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4 years ago, I was recovering from RNY Gastric Bypass at Vanderbilt University Medical Hospital. Today, I am happy and healthy and life goes on.
As I type this I am wearing size 10 Eddie Bauer jeans - a far cry from the size 24 elastic waist "jeans" I wore the day of my surgery. Recent blood test showed normal readings, although I do continue to take two medications for cholesterol and triglycerides. The reading are normal with medication instead of astronomical with medication.
Food will always be an issue for me but one I manage instead of the other way around. I know I am in control and I CHOOSE what I put into my mouth. I cannot control life.
I can report that life does go on without bingeing and "stuffing" down my feelings. I can report that there are times when life is not fair and it kicks you in the gut and you can survive those times without raiding the fridge. Truth is ... all problems eventually go away, weight is here to stay.
Losing weight did not and will not solve all of my problems. It is one less thing to worry about.
A few short weeks ago I danced at our daughter's reception and it was one of the happiest days of my life. I stopped for a brief moment in the church where she married and said a special thank you to God for letting me live to see that day and that I am healthy and I feel wonderful.
I don't know who reads this but if you want to know if there is life after gastric bypass I say AMEN and YES!

I remember "back in the day" when I was researching WLS and came upon this site. I then decided to blog - mainly for myself - but also as a diary of my thoughts, fears and what I hoped would be my success for maybe a few interest family members and friends. Whenever I read other's post I was curious why they stopped blogging after about a year of surgery. I vowed not to be like that. OOOPS!

What has happened? LIFE!!!
Let me stop right here and throw my hands up in the air for a "Thank you Jesus" moment. My heart soars with the events of the past nearly 4 years.
I work full time
I dress in heels and skirts and I feel awesome
My weight is stable and controlled
I live WITH the limitiations and I choose not to dwell on them
I Choose to be happy almost everyday
I sleep better
I feel better
I look better than I did 10 or perhaps 20 years ago
Whenever I meet new people they are SHOCKED at my before pictures
My marriage survived and mostly thrives
Almost everyone in my family accepts my decision - some more than others
Travel is much more exciting

What do I look forward to?
I will be the mother of the bride in 4 months and my dress is GORGEOUS!
I will be able to play with my future grandchildren
I look forward to the future because only God knows what lies ahead for me, but with his help, I can do anything!

In closing, I heard someone the other day say, " I would rather burn out than rust out"! 
Maybe it won't be so long before I post again - but then again - life happens.

I am working again - mainly part time hours but working nonetheless. I actually like what I am doing. I am learning new things and the three days a week I work fly by.
Everyday, I do my hair and make-up and get dressed with high heels. That feeling has not worn off yet. I love the feeling of wearing dresses or skirts and high heels. The running joke is that I will wear them until I fall and break a hip. Among other things, since WLS, I have lost one entire shoe size and since I LOVE shoes I have replaced many of them. Now, since I am not carrying so much weight I can wear heels again. I do feel like a real girl - a pretty girl.
Less than 50 days until I turn 50!

The really BIG birthday is quickly approaching and something that feels a bit like dread is creeping in. That's the bad news but the good news is I did not look nor feel this way when I turned 40 or when I turned 30. I am at the best physical shape of my adult life. I am enjoying the summer and summer fashions for the first time in decades.
So, action is the best answer for inaction so here is the PLAN:
Counting down from 100 days gives me a daily reminder
Getting some goals down for this time frame
Making something good happen everyday
Hitting 50 is not like hitting a wall! (Remember that!)

Here it is the last days of April and Tennessee keeps changing its mind as to which season it is! I think I can idenitify with the uncertainity.
I have started my 4th week of yoga instruction and I am beginning to see some progress. Sometimes I look at myself in the ceiling-to-floor mirrors at the Y and I feel a surge of pride because I can do so many things I could never do before and then in the next minute I can only see some middle age woman who can't straightened out her legs and do whatever it is the other people seem to do easily. 
So, what to do with this multiple personality battling it out in my mind? WHO am I anyway? WHAT am I? I think the answer is as fluid as the Tennessee weather. I am whatever I think I am. I am responsible for letting those nagging thoughts of self-doubt have a place in my mind and take up space. I have come so far and I am so much healthier than I ever have been. Why do I obsess over 12 pounds that would put me at my "ideal" weight when 140 pounds ago I couldn't even IMAGINE being here??? Pardon the pun, I think the "me" image I feed is the one who wins

Sunday, March 30, 2008
I am so grateful winter is over. It was a dark, drab and depressive time for me but as the caterpillar turns into a butterfly so I hope to be too.
My new body is taking some getting used to but I love the results. To be honest, not being surrounded by the extra weight first and then the excess skin now has left me feeling very vunerable. Getting over the tummy tuck was emotionally harder than the gastric bypass. The results were immediate and my older brain could not really wrap itself around the change. Plus, I feel the need to "explain or justify" my decision to have plastic surgery as if maybe I don't deserve to look better. Screw that! It's a done deal and I might as well get over it and enjoy life.

One week down and I am still here! I think the further you get from surgery the less traumatic it seems and that is OK with me. The past weekend was rough as I had unexpected problems with the pain medicine Percocet. I had horrible thoughts and disturbing visions and probably what was one of the longest nights and headaches of my life. By Saturday, a change in meds and more rest made all the difference in the world. 

I head back to the doctor tomorrow and then another appointment next week so between the two maybe some of my attachments can be removed. 

Two important questions you may have in mind …

1. How do you look?
2. Is Rick still alive? 

 First, it ain’t pretty but it is better everyday. There is so much swelling you can’t really tell what the final outcome will be. (FYI – 4 months for the initial results, final results can take up to a year) 

Second question: I can report with all sincerity that Mr. Church has been Mr. Florence Nightingale! What a trooper! He has taken care of my medical needs more than I anticipated. He hung in there when percocet made me extremely mouthy and bitchy. I know you cannot imagine me being mouthy! He has kept me fed and showered and medicated. He has kept the house picked up and the dogs out of my way. I seriously owe him BIG TIME! Maybe I’ll give him a peek under the sports bra. LOL

Two years out and I am at home recuperating from a tummy tuck and breast lift. I didn't give too much thought before I had gastric bypass, thinking that losing weight would be enough. The strange thing is how much my thoughts have changed over the past two years.

Last week I did something I have probably NEVER done before in my life - I ran 1/2 mile! Up to this point the ONLY things I have ever run is my mouth. As a kid, I was sick a lot and got out of PE as much as possible. (Funny, I thought that was a good thing all those years ago.)  I never played sports. Yeah, it was a surprise to me to be obese. LOL

I have been walking on my treadmill 4-5 times a week since my last post. Right now, I am on the treadmill for one hour and doing  about 3.5 miles.  A couple of weeks ago, I got this wild idea that maybe I could run and gave it a try. At first, I held on to the bar so tightly my forearms hurt for days. But then, I just ran. It's not pretty and it is not fast but I CAN DO IT. One of my personal goals is to be able to run one mile in the great outdoors.

Tweny-two months out from surgery and I am stil in awe of the whole process. I still would do it again - in  a heartbeat!

Ok, I have decided to walk 10,000 steps a day. There, I blogged it so it will happen. Isn't that how it workds? Cyberspace is so awesome!
I just got back from Seattle, WA and can I say it was beautiful and vibrant and I want to move there and live like a hippie? I never saw so many people on bikes unless it was when I lived in Germany over 10 years ago.
Seattle defies the same city, different day mode of travel. Fresh food, eclectic shops and really great coffee.
I am also embracing the fat girl that resides inside of me. She see food - she like food. UMM Food Good! AND I am embracing the thinner adult in me that says it's ok to have a bite and not roll out of a resturant, bloated and sick.
Well, I digress - 10,000 steps. I started in Seattle and I am going to continue here in Tennessee. Maybe if I started walking 10,000 steps a day from TN I could be in Seattle in a matter of years ....