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Ok, I'm not that creative with the blog titles. 

Alot has happened since my last post.  I received my insurance approval within four days of submitting the paperwork.  I attribute much of that to the staff at Dr. Kligman's office.  I know I'm the annoying patient who calls all the time, but they were able to get my stuff navigated through the system.  

So I had the following pre-operative appontments. 
5/27  -  Bloodwork  -  The technician was able to get much of the blood she needed on the first try, which to me indicates her skills.  She had to move to my hand and do the next one for the remaining 4 viles of blood. 

I had to get another EKG while I was there, all I can say is they need bigger gowns.  My breasts were not covered which is absolutely embarrasing.

5/30 -  I had to get an ultrasound and Upper GI x-ray.  Out of all of the tests I've had, I will say that the Upper GI X-Ray was the hardest one.  That stuff they give you was horrible.  The process wasn't painful, but I threw up multiple times because I couldln't keep the liquids down.  

6/4  -  I met with Dr. Kligman and his staff one last time.  His staff was really nice.  Mary B gave me a orange, which helped since Dr. Kligman was late and I hadn't taken in my lunch portion of the liquid diet.  So far I ahve lost 8 pounds onthe diet in 6 days.  Though there were some days where I did have a more substantive mea.  

my impression of Dr. Kligman is that he is a very professional surgeon.  That is the main thing you can ask of someone.  His staff makes him more complete and adds more of a personal touch.  he is very honest, which is again something you would want.  

I have told most of my co-workers about what I am doing and have been surprised at how much they are supportive of what I am oing.  I haven't faced any opposition, though I have only shared it with the immediate staff in the office.  

Each time I speak about it, I am trying to be more confident about what I am doing.  I was s afrad to tell one of my mentors because I was ashamed that I need significant help to lose the weight.  She was surprised at how much I weighed, but understood why I'm doing tthis when I shared with her the health conditions i have racked up associated with my weight.  

Ok, this post wasn't supposed to be a novel, so I'll run.  My parents are coming Friday, so I have to get ready for that.  

More to come. 

Not much to report.  

I met wth Dr. Kligman and found him to be a wonderful man.  he is firm, but kind.  

All of my materials are ready to go and should have been submitted to the insurance company.  So now I wait.  I'm really hoping to be able to have my surgery right after my class ends on May 4 with my final paper due May 12.  

My students arrive on June 2, so I'm hoping that I'll be up and running by then.  

One aspect that dos make me said is the fact that my neighbor who has seen me all the way through this process has to lose some more additional weight, delaying her surgery.  Maybe it's God's plan, but my hopes were built on us doing this together.  I felt extremely bad that she was delayed once again in that she's be going for this surgery for two years now to only have been delayed time and time again.  I look up to her alot.  She sacrificed her chance for going to surgery in order for her son to go for surgery first. 

I'm a little tired, so I'm headed to bed.  Pleae continue to keep me in your prayers.  Now that I'll be doing this alone, I'll need as much support as I can get. 

Hey everyone:
Things have picked up around here.  I have gotten all of the clearances I needed to fulfill my requirements.  My neighbor who has been going through the process together with me went to Office Depot and made copies of all of the reports, charts, and lab in put them together in a binder.  By the time we got it together, I was so impressed that there was a concise document with all of my information.  It was so pretty!

So I had my appointment with Dr. Fullum on Thursday.  It was great to see him again.  He is such a personable professional.  He switched from University of Maryland to Howard University to head up their department and to gain a Center for Excellence for the unit.  After talking to me he sad that he would go into great detail the day before surgery, so I as like whoa, we need to talk to my parents.  He was patient enough to give my parents a call.  The call went great though Dr. Fullum told my parents that I was Type 2 diabetic which isn't something I had out righ told them.  They don't really see a distinction between insulin resistance and extreme cases of diabetes.  I hadn't gone into much depth with my mom because she is now dealing with both her sister and brother who are diabetics with some severe complications.  But I do think that the conversation with Dr. Fullum was the right thing to get my parents to understand why I am a candidate for surgery and why I wanted to do it. 

Here is where my head is spinning.  Dr. Fullum just moved over to Howard University, so he doesn't have all of his old staff.  So the current ones are new to bariatric sugery.  He didn't have a dietician and was still using the old forms from UMMC.  My neighbor who is much heavier than me couldn't get her blood pressure and weight taken because they didn't have a blood pressure cuff big enough for her nor a scale big enough to weigh her.  The hospital was generally clean and there didn't appear to be utter choas.  Which was what I had envisioned Howard being like.  But I am extremely concerned about the neighborhood and the support system piece.  I hate to say this, it feels like Dr. Fullum is a one man show right now.  

I had a chance to look on the UMMC website to look at their bariatric unit and it looks awesome!  The rooms are beautiful, the ratings are high, and the support system is there.  The OH members who have gone through Dr. Kligman recommend him and seem to present him in a positive light.  My neighbor and I have an appointment to see Dr. Kligman on April 9th, so I'll know more then.  

So that's what going on.  Please pray for me and the decisions I have to make.  But one good note, I love my cpap machine.  It has given me a level of normalcy during my waking hours and I am no longer fighting sleep.  My blood pressure has been stable at 123/80 which is a vast difference from 167/108 that I consistenty had at the beginning of this.  Yippe!  Of course, I don't want to use the cpap machine forever, but it has helped me a great deal.  After meeting the respiratory therapist she said that I had stopped breathing 117 times in an hour and only got into REM sleep for about 10 minutes.  I haven't gotten vivid dreams, but she said hat should come back in time.  

Thanks again for the support

Ok, it’s been a while.  Though a lot has been accomplished since then. 

I had my second sleep study done and supposedly the technician was able to get my snoring and sleep apnea under control.  I was still hooked up to a number of wires and sensors that monitored my brainwaves’ and sleeping patterns.  It is amazing that just positive pressure could correct many of the problems I have had with sleep over the past couple of years.  Right now, I feel so exhausted and worn down from lack of sleep and the evasiveness of a good quality rest.  I honestly believe that if I don’t correct the sleeping patterns and difficulties that I won’t be able to finish my graduate degree nor take on more challenges at work.  Fatigue sometimes feels as though it slows the processing power of my brain.  And the funny thing is, I am aware of it.  When the technician woke me up from the study, I felt wide awake and ready to go.  Not necessarily rested, but it was certainly better than a normal nights sleep.  Now later that day, I was exhausted again.  But if that little bit of improvement is any indicator of what is to come with the CPAP, then I’m ready for it.  The pulminologist didn’t even require me to come back for the test results, my sleep apnea was so severe that they put a rush order on my machine.  I’m supposed to get it on Wednesday.

 

I saw the psychologist who is supposed to be sending my report and evaluation tomorrow. 

 

I’m scheduled once again to see the pulminologist on March 18^th for a final check up.  Hopefully, I’ll get my clearance from him.  At that time, I’ll be done!  I’ll have everything that Dr. Fullum and the University of Maryland required for my surgery.

 

Speaking of Dr Fullum, I have a quandary to figure out.  For anyone who is listening or reading, you advice and experiences are always welcomed.   Back in December 2007, I had my initial consultation with Dr. Fullum.  He is a very pleasant and knowledgeable surgeon.  I was incredibly impressed with his kindness and seriousness about the surgery.  But the big est thing that I was excited about was that he was willing to speak with my parents during my next appointment to talk through questions they might have about surgery. 

 

In late January, I got wind of the fact that Dr. Fullum was leaving UMD and was going to Howard University Hospital.  At first I was thinking, this is a no brainer.  I will follow Dr. Fullum to his new location.  But as I am getting closer, I have some reservations about going through Howard University.  I am glad the Dr. Fullum is bringing his knowledge and experience to a community that needs to address obesity and the health consequences that come along with it.  But Howard University is located in one of the worsest part of DC where crack heads, drug dealers, and gangs are constant mainstays of the community.  I am unsure as to the quality of the hospital, but am concerned about my parents coming to Howard and seeing the quality of both the hospital and the surrounding neighborhood.  While Dr. Fullum was at UMD before leaving, he indicated that my neighbor and I would be one of the first ones he would operate on once he got to Howard.  That can be seen as an advantage but also a disadvantage.  Originally, Dr. Fullum’s patients were going to be transferred over to Dr. Kligman who was there before Dr. Fullum at UMD.  I’ve never met Dr. Kligman, but have heard that he can be somewhat harsh initially but is seen as a competent surgeon.  I have heard that the quality of UMD is quite good.  UMD has already obtained its Center for Excellence status when Howard University would be just starting the process.  So what is a girl to do.  If I stayed with Dr. Fullum, I could very well be looking at an April surgery date.  If Iwent with Dr. Kligman, I would be looking at least a May surgery date. 

 

I have an appointment with Dr. Fullum on march 20, 2008.  So I want to be very honest with Dr. Fullum about my reservations.  I just wish he had stayed with UMD another month until I could get through the process. 

 

My parent’s tried to start a conversation about surgery since I told them I had an appointment.  They don’t understand why I couldn’t just diet and exercise.  Or what co-morbities mean to my health.  That’s why I was hoping that Dr. Fullum could address some of their concerns.  They did say that they would support me.  But it’s kind of like support without acceptance. 

 

On the other than, my boss and I did have a conversation about surgery.  I told her I would know more after my appointment on the 20^th, but she was awesome about understanding that this is something I want to pursue to improve my health.  Yeah!

 

That’s it for now.

 

Things are moving along in the process.  I got the results of my sleep study which indicated what we already knew,  I have severe sleep apnea.  Essientially I am losing about 100 minutes of sleep.  That is alot when it usully only turns out to be about 4 hours of sleep.  Sometimes I am so exhausted.  So I have my second sleep study for February 28th.  

My other tests came out good.  I am not allergic to other things besides some trees which would indicate a mild seasonal allergy.  

I have my psych eval on February 29th.  

I'm hoping to have everything ready to go to Dr. Fullum on the second week in March.  It seems so far, but I'm sure that'l roll around pretty soon. 

I finally went to the doctor to take care of this cold I have been having for weeks.  I had gotten over the origional cold, but kept a cough that was realy annoying.  Then Thursday I started coughing up nasty mucus and having cakey stuff come out of my eyes.  Doctor gave me some antibiotics, zyrtec, and eye drops for can't you believe, pink eye. 

So things ae moving right along. 

Nothing too much to update.  But I had my sleep study done this past Saturday.  I was surprised that I slept at all, but somehow I did.  The sleep technician was very confident that I do have sleep apnea and a bad case of it.  

Sleeping has been something that I've struggled with for years.  With me going to school in the evenings and wanting a more active lifestyle, I feel that this is holding me back.  I don't have energy to go anywhere after work.  And I don't feel rested when I wake in the morning.  I've even been caught dozing in meetings.  

I have an appointment with the pulminologist next week and I think the psychologist as well.  Things are moving right along. 

I was looking at Biggest Loser and kept feeling discouraged that I haven't been able to exercise and lose weigt on my own.  My dad keeps saying that he just feels that I could do it with just diet and exercise.  

Yesterday, I had my pulminary function test done.  Wow, that was a workout and it is totally counter intuitive.  Who would have thought that breathing could be a challenge.  For one, I am not use to breathing out of my mouth, so my rythym wasn't quite right.  The technician said that my numbers looked pretty good.  But that the doctor would have to give me a definitive answer on what the numbers mean.  

I was suppposed to see the psychologist this week, but will have to reschedule.  She cancelled out on us.  But it worked out that I could go to a meeting that I needed to attend.  

I'm trying to balance these doctor's appointments with not taking too much leave.  Part of my job is to deal with reasonable accommodation of employees with disabilities.  Many of the cases that I am currently working have to do with time and attendance issues.  Supervisors complaining about the employee not being available and having too many doctor's appointments.  I hope that mine never gets to that level, but it has certainly made me more cognizant of it. 

Tomorrow is the sleep study.  A co-worker of mine is going to take Denver for me.  She has two poodles, so it'll be interesting if he will get any sleep.  Tonight, I'll sleep on a quilt so it'll have my scent in it.  Last time that he stayed there, she said he hid behind a treadmill terrified.  I would have liked for him to stay with a puppy raiser in my community, but I get a feelin that she thinks that I depend on her too much for things.  

I'm actually a little worried about the sleep study.  I have to report at 8:45 p.m.  Normally on the weekends, I stay up until 2:00 a.m. or later.  I am just that way, I feel that sleeping schedule is so out of wack.  I feel sleeepy during the day, but wide awake at night.  There are a number of blind people who have the same thing.  Somehow I'll get to sleep at some decent hour. 

I'm thinking that my surgery won't happen until April.  f it happened during the early part of March, that would be great.  But my mom's retrement party is March 28th and I just booked tickets to go home.  Pretty soon, we'l probably need to have that conversation of dates.  I get the feeling that she's excited that I'm getting checked out.  But we haven't talked about the surgery since that one telephone conversation. 

Oh well,  time for bed. 

I just wnated to write and let eeryone know how I'm doing.  I'm moving along in the process.  I have now gotten clearance from the endrocrinologist, cardiologist, and today the gastroenterologist.  

the biopsies that he took during my EGD came back ok.  It does concern me that there were some enlarged glands.  But Dr. Mostaghim assured me that it shouldn't effect surgery and doesn't necessarily indicate cancer.  

One thing that I have noticed since I have gotten my blood pressure under control is that I don't hve as many headaches and I'm not as light sensitive as I am normally.   That is a huge thing.  Normally, the lights are off in my office. but lately, I can stand to have them on.  I don't know if this is a direct correlation, but hey, as long as I'm feelng better. 

I have started taking my dog out for 30 minute walks, so I'm starting to at least establish some kind of schedule.  

That's about it.  

Wow it  has been a while since I have posted.  Things have been busy here.  I am grateful for this whole process.  I feel that I am getting the best care that money can buy.  In addition, I am continued to be blessed by people around me who are supportive.  I have not shared openly with co-workers of my intentions to have surgery. 

 

After the cardiology testing, I spent another week worrying over what the results would say about my cardiovascular health.  When I first went to see the cardiologist my blood pressure was 167/120 which is dangerously high.  This was the highest it had ever been, though it was an indicator of what it had been progressing to over the past four years.  After starting Caduet and quitting caffeinated drinks my blood pressure was 124/90 when I went last week.  Dr. Dakak was incredible.  He is a joy to meet and answered all of my questions.  His staff is phenomenal.  My results were normal and I don’t have any blockages that I need to worry over.  So I now have his clearance for surgery.  He does feel that it would be a good option for me to continue to lose weight.

 

On Monday (1/7) I had the upper GI.  One thing that I have come to find out during this whole ordeal is that I have very small veins and a professional needs to find them.  The nurses couldn’t find any and the anesthesiologist had to come and apply some kind of pain medication and find the vein.  The staff were very nice though.  During a vitals check, we did notice that my temperature was slightly elevated.  Boy, was that  an indicator of things to come!  Dr. Mostaghim was very nice and explained what he found after the procedure.  He did indicate that I had a slight case of gastritis and he removed some polyps from my stomach for biopsy.  He doesn’t think it is anything serious, but it is something I’ll have to come back to get more results.  

 

After that, I have been battling what seems like the flu.  Fever, sinus congestion, shivering, coughing, and aching muscles racked by body for about a week.  I am still suffering with a cough, but for the most part I am feeling better.  I hope to be back on track to get the chest x-ray and pulmonary bloodwork completed. 

 

I have the sleep study scheduled on 2/2 and that would complete all of the testing that know about.  Yippy!

 

I pray that things continue to go well. 

 

Thank you all for all of your support. 

 

The holiday celebrations around the house were pretty good.  We had a number of family members over to the house throughout the day on Christmas and the few days following it.  Mom made some pretty good dishes, dumplings, green beans, biscuits, turkey, ham, and more.  Can anyone say YUMMY!  I have done pretty good about only getting one serving and laying off the cokes.  Though I do feel a twang of craving for something more like the carbonate taste from a coke.    We had simple gift giving and that was good.  I was just happy to be home with family, presents weren't that important to me. That has been the case this year and progressively truer ever since I left home.  I guess since I am financially self sufficient, I don't want or need alot of extra stuff.   I got some silverware, a clock radio with some nice internal speakers, a sweater, and a nice wallet.  I got my dad a digital voice recorder which has become his latest play toy.  I can occasionally hear him testing it out.  My hope was that he could record simple notes or numbers if my mom wasn't here to right it down for him.   He doesn't have enough vision to read print and doesn't know Braille.  So I thought this would be a good solution. . I was hoping to get both my parents a membership to the local gym.  My dad has been doing some walks around the community for exercise, but my mom won't go with him.  I told them that's what I wanted to give them both.  But my mom said I should wait to see what bills I have for school before getting anything for them.  I know it is an excuse not to go.  The biggest thing that makes me frustrated is that my dad won't encourage my mom to go with him on the walks.  I almost think she doesn't feel like she can.  My dad said I would be waisting money getting a gym membership for them.  So it is a stale mate.  The only thing is that I have to be encouraged to take what ever measures I need to take care of myself.   My uncle who probably considers me like a daughter, had to be put into the hospital the day after Christmas.  we saw him Christmas day and it was pretty clear that he wasn't feeling well.  He has diabetes, high blood pressure, and a number of other things wrong with him.  His wife found him in a slumped position late Christmas night.  Hearing about this makes me want this surgery even more.  I know too many people with uncontrolled diabetes management and it is slowly but surely killing them.  And I can see myself in that situation in forty, thirty, or even twenty years if something doesn't change.    My parents and I haven't talked about the surgery, despite the fact that I am pushing for March.  I have been taking Caduet for the past week and half and have been fairly impressed with the numbers I see for my blood pressure.  It actually has come down to normal levels.  I don't take my blood pressure around my parents because I don't want them asking a bunch of questions.  The heart palpitations have stopped or barely noticeable.  That is a big relief in itself.    I hung out with some friends last night and it was great to spend time with them.  We caught up and it felt like we were picking up where we had left off the last time we all were together.  I was a bit sad when it was time for me to come home.  I wish we were all closer together physically so that we could spend more time together.   Today I went to church and it was pretty good.  Usually when church lets out, I go and hug the older women of the church.  Everyone was happy to see me.  But one of the ladies commented that I was getting too fat and asked what I weighed.  I could have balled right there.  It makes me even more self conscious.  I was supposed to get together with a college friend of mine who I had a crush on, but I haven't called him back to set something up.  Primarily for the same reason.  I shared my feelings with my mom, but she didn't get it.  She said that I should be just me and not try to be someone else.  But I wanted to snap back at her by saying what if I wasn't happy with myself physically?  I know I should go see my friend, but am finding it hard to do so.    I am now understanding why people who are severely obese become prisoners in their home.  It probably initially starts out as not the result of the inability to get out.  But because of a fear that people will judge, make harsh comments, or not understand what struggles they face.  As times goes along, then it becomes an issue of physically can they get out of the house and eventually the bed.    Even with being blind and having the coke bottle glasses, I never was really conscious of myself or had a sense of poor self esteem.  But this trip has brought up feelings of self doubt that I need to deal with.    Everything else is okay here.  Denver is great.  I think he's enjoying the back yard and some of the freedom that comes with it.   More later.