fmjchang

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I'm not too proud....I've only lost 5 POUNDS from May 30th which was my last weigh in.  I'm mad at myself because I KNOW I need to try harder and work out more.  So I'm at about 169 right now and I told myself I should be at least 150 by now.  That's all gonna change now because I have started exercising and drinking more water.  I dunno if anyone out there feels the same but I'm starting to think I might need a fill.  My appointment with Dr. V is on July 7th and I'm hoping I can speak in more details with her.  Thanks for everyone's support.

<3 Marsha

So yesterday I left the hospital at around 1pm and I must say that Englewood hospital was amazing.  I felt comfortable the staff was friendly.  I do miss the dilaudid painkiller because I feel like the oxycodone gets stuck in my stomach or something, as much as I cut it up.  I think the worst thing is the gas after the surgery, pain can go away with the oxycodone but the gas is just annoying and I just have to keep walking around to get it out.  I really want to thank Dr. V all her staff, all of Englewood Hosp. staff and my family, because without their support I couldn't have done it. 
I must say I do miss food right now.  The shakes fill me but watching everyone grill for Memorial day is a bit of a downer.
Okay well off I go to rest my bod. 
Thanks to those who sent me kind msgs before my surgery, I really do appreciate that and everything went well. God Bless you all!
---Marsha---

Tomorrow is my surgery day and I am a bit nervous and still in shock cant believe my insurance approved everything.  I am very lucky and excited to start a new life that doesn't revolve around food all the time.  I'm tired of being hungry all the time.  I need to live my life for me and my family. 
---Marsha---

Wow.  There are so many things running through my head right now.  And I am wondering whether my insurance will cover this, approve this, but how much and what will I have to pay?  My husband nags me about making sure the insurance pays and find out all the details because I always get in trouble for not double checking and believing everything people say.  Well at least I've gotten him to support me more in this journey I would like to take to be healthier and live a longer life with my family.  And of course, I want to look and FEEL beautiful again.  As many of other people I'm sure, when you have gained sooo much weight over time, it takes a toll on your mental health.  You avoid the weight scales, you avoid the mirror and things like that.  I can't stand that.  I can't stand the feeling where I just want to rip off the fat and get my energy back.  I don't want my son or husband to be embarrassed of taking me out.  I want to look my real age of 23 and not 33, in which many people think I am.