My Original Journey

May 24, 2011

POST_OP
1-24-06 Well 3 1/2 yrs have gone by. I still work at managing my weight. I've gone back to old BAD eating habits and still have between 50 - 85 lbs to get rid of. Exercise is still the easy piece for me. It's the eating what I shouldn't that is stumping me. The nutritionist I hired hasn't worked at all so I'm pursuing someone with expertise in Post-bariatric surgical patients.

12-4-02 Gained 4 lbs. It's been really busy since Thanksgiving. Still eating cookies and milk. Still throwing up. Still exercising only 2x a week. I must double that and 1/2 the food.

11-23-02 Wow! It's been 6 months. I'm amazed at how much weight I've lost and how even my small clothes are too big. I'm down 75 lbs in 6 months. I've gone from a sz 28/30 down to a sz 18/20.
I've been on a plateau for 6 weeks because I'm eating too much and not exercising enough.
I'm eating everything out of Pyrex custard dishes and very small saucers. I can hold more food than I "should" and am still used to stuffing myself. Just because 'I can' doesn't mean that 'I should'.
This surgery does not fix the cravings or the compulsive overeating. Choc Chip cookies and Milk are still my favorite comfort foods. The cookies make my stomach upset. I cannot process the milk sugar. When I eat and drink together, I throw up. Yet the urge to eat/drink them are still there.
It still upsets me that I had to resort to surgery to reduce my weight and embrace my health. Yet, I know that I know that nothing else did or would work for me.
Now, to get thru the Holidays and all those cookies!

6-6-02 Tomorrow will be 2 wks post-op. I'm healing so fast that they released me from hospital a day early. Within 5 days I was walking 1/2 mile daily. Week 2 has been more painful than week 1 was. I have a sharp, stabbing pain above my navel. Dr. Tillquist says its a staple too close to a nerve ending and it will dissolve within 2 weeks. So far, I'm down 21 lbs. Although, I'm still of the opinion that this surgery is NOT the "easy way out" or "Cheating". Granted, if I could have kept the weight off by any other means, I would have.

PRE-OP
5-17- 02 What a week it has been!?! I'm stressed beyond belief. Grandma's cat died after almost 22 years, my best friend was laid off and now the surgeon's office has called and said I have heart damage and they can't proceed until they get clearance from my primary care provider.
So back and forth between Kaiser and Dr. Tillquist. Of course, Kaiser wants to schedule all these elaborate tests but it will take 3-6 weeks to get in, so just cancel my surgery until after that. I DON'T THINK SO! Kaiser's excuse is that they need to check all the other people who are seriously in danger of having a heart attack first, so I'll just have to wait. My response was that they are not going to hook up anyone to a treadmill if that person is seriously in danger of having a heart attack, and my surgeon is booked up for months. Besides, if they can't get me in, Kaiser was going to have a hysterical woman on their hands. I suggested to them that it might be more effective to just get me an appointment for their tests before next Thursday.
After all this research, and classes, and fear, and struggle, I have finally come to believe there is hope for me and Kaiser just wants to snatch that away from me one week before surgery because they don't want to have to work harder at providing prompt, appropriate medical care? I DON'T THINK SO!
If you ask me, the door above every Kaiser facility should read "Abandon hope, all ye who enter here." They are inexcusably pathetic.
So I have a stress-test on the treadmill next Tuesday. And so far, I'm still scheduled for surgery on Friday.

5-14-02 I was at the hospital for pre-admit testing and couldn't believe my weight struggle has gotten to this point. Why me? Why this? I'm so very effective with goal achievement in Every other area of my life. Why this? Oh well. If it helps, let's do it.

5-3-02
MyLifeByDesign was amazing. I have pictures of sunsets that are amazing. The whole class was so loving and supportive. I'm glad I took a 10 day vacation that was an immersion in joy and relaxation. I'm clear about how to strategize my vision and integrate it into my hectic, busy life. I feel so much peace. I'm looking forward to surgery.

4-12-02
Kaiser doesn't do it Lap. Still scheduled for surgery May 24. Meanwhile, I'm off to Hawaii for 2 weeks to take a seminar "My Life By Design". We swim with the dolphins as part of the class. I'm looking forward to this!

3-22-02
I finaly got ahold of Kaiser's surgery dept today, after lodging complaints with their customer service. They scheduled me to meet with Dr. Lucas in early May. They will call me back Monday to tell me whether they do RNY laproscopically. My credit union loan approval to self-pay will be in on Monday. If Kaiser will do it Lap, then I'll have them do it.

3-13-02
I met Dr. Tillquist today and was immediately scheduled for surgery on May 24, 2002. I'm nervous but excited. I have 2 friends having it before then so I'll get to see firsthand. I still cannot get insurance and am looking at financing my home for the cash for the surgery (about $19K).

3-2-02
I've been thru two series of Kelly Elliott's Bypass Support classes now. The first time scared me so badly that I went out for beer and pizza and cried for 3 hours. Then decided to walk away from the surgery research for a year. I've been back at it since the first of the year, realizing that EVERYTHING I have tried, has failed. I cannot expect different results by doing the same actions.
I have an appointment with Dr. Tillquist April 2, and Dr. Snyder April 3. I will choose who I want on my medical team at that point.
I cannot get insurance independently because I'm too fat. I've given up all hope with Kaiser. Kaiser is pathetic to deal with and having seen some scars that Dr. Davis left in her wake - NO WAY! The Weight Management team of Kaiser Colorado is judgemental and has excuses why they cannot do anything other than collect data and more money. If I had time to fight it, I would report them to the Insurance Commissioner. They are THAT bad.
5'5", Started at 290lbs. Dieted down to 260. Looking at the surgery, doing a ton of research. This surgery scares me yet I know I've tried everything else.

1-7-02
Still scared. I'm being considered by Kaiser in Denver. I finally got the vision in my head of me as a size 10 or 12. It scared me to death. I've lost tons of weight in my life and never been able to keep it off.

0 Comments