Grn4MyEyes
More crap
Oct 24, 2007
ARGH!!!! I hate this!!!
Sep 25, 2007
I hate this crap!!!!!!!! I've had a headache for a couple of weeks. I also had a a cold/flu as well. Well considering I'm a Fentynal patch I'm still in considerable pain in my face. The Dr. is sure it's sinusitis, face swelling...mild ear inflammation...pressure around my sinus's sends me thru the roof, and the migraine is a perfect circle around the sinus spot. Dr sends me to hospital for CT...guess what? NOTHING!!!! Even the Dr said he didn't think anything would show up because none of my tests have made sense.
My arms and hands have been swelling like crazy, yet today of course the swelling went down when I went to the Dr. Yet I have a rash on one arm, and what he called phlebitis on the other. But he has no clue what's wrong with me, and I'm starting to feel like i'm going crazy!!! I have that appt with the Rheumatologist end of Oct, but at this rate I don't even know if he's gonna find anything...
My damn Dr today looked at me and goes what do you want me to diagnosis, because with your history of not making any sense you have as just as much a chance of hitting a diagnosis as I do...How messed up is that? Especially since it's true. So I'm at home, with severe sinus pain, severe headache and my eyes feeling like they are being pulled from my sockets sometimes!!! Oh yeah that's the other thing...I feel like my eyes are drry, yet I can cry, but when I wake up in the morn it feels like when I open my eyes, and move my eyes around it feels like they rip away from the wall behind my eyeballs....Plus I'm seeing things occassionally in my peripheral and he has no clue how.. I'm supposed to go to an ENT to see what they think....
All this crap is starting to drive me NUTS!!!! I know I'm babbling and probably making no sense fully, but I'm just venting and being pissed off....Any suggestions are welcome!!!!
Moved up appt!!
Sep 21, 2007
YAY!!! My rheumatologist's office called today and they said unfortunately the Dr I had the appt with passed away unexpectedly, and that my appt was going to be changed to another Dr if that was ok..I'm like considering there's not other Dr's even available BEFORE the end of the year, umm YES...Then she gave me the good news..she could move up my appt to Oct 30th!!! FINALLY maybe someone can figure what the hell's wrong with me!!!!!!!
New check up....
Sep 01, 2007
All my nutrient/proteins, etc are all normal. Just the virus's still there, and my liver enzymes are pretty elevated, but doesn't understand why, because everything else is normal. He did say to me he's not sure a rheumatologist is going to work because 95% of the meds they could prescribe me for pain I can't take at the moment. They are either NSAIDS, which I can't take, or some form of a med that will lower my auto-immune system and well duh, that won't work either because it's already low enough on it's own.
Well it's once again, just another waiting game, with no end in site. I'm tired every day. I ache every day. I'm in pain every day. I'm weak every day. It just goes on and on. So until next time......I'll just keeping up my strength for the next day to get thru...
Another day...Another Pain
Aug 28, 2007
Unfortunately though now I have MORE problems. For some reason my blood pessure has gone way down. It ranges from 90ish/60ish or bottom number even goes down to the high 50's. I'm supposed to have another follow up with my oncologist in 2 weeks to go do another full panel to find out where my WBC(white blood count) is at, and see where my epstein barr virus and such is at as well.. I called them though today about my low BP and they are doing the Blood work tomorrow, and follow up with the Dr on Friday. They want me to keep them informed abnout my BP and if the headaches and weakness gets too be too much they want me to call them so he can meet me at the ER...*sigh* I hope it's nothing more than just some crap that's easily fixable.
But anyways, just sick and tired and being sick and tired dammit. Off to lay down again cause I'm weakness is coming on again...
Will it EVER end?
Aug 10, 2007
Then I have people say maybe you're depressed, maybe you need to see someone. Well I have and it doesn't help. Why? because they seem to assume that my *depression* HAS to be based off my past....ummm NO it's based off the fact I regret this surgery as it seems to have ruined my life, because since I had it I've had nothing but problems. for 17 months since I haa the surgery. Hospital stays, TPN's, sickness, pain, virus's noone can explain and now this??
Sorry doc, but this doesn't have anything to do with my past and if my mom was mean to me..LOL it has to do with I don't know anyone that wouldn't probably start to feel isolated and being a complete anomoly because Dr's can't figure out what's wrong fully with me...Plus my husband works out of town so often, I don't have really any outside friends, and even if I did I can hardly function because of pain and such so this *depression* is because Im sick of being sick!!! I want a normal life again. Their answer is to for some reason find out *why* I'm depressed...umm I already know and told you...ok then well let's find out why being sick is depressing you...Let's look at your childhood? Ummmm this has nothing to do with my childhood..Being sick is depressing me..and noone can give me a reason really why I'm sick!! THAT'S DEPRESSING!!! sheesh...some people.
That's another reason I started this blog...To vent....*big breath* I just want to get thru one day without hurting...I did this surgery to be able to spend time with my family doing things that I normally couldn't do because I was too fat or large or out of breath, couldn't walk for long periods of time etc...Now I'm 125lbs and still can't do anything, but now it's because I have multiple virus's..walking hurts everything inmy body. I don't sleep well...fill in the blank and I have it. That's why I'm depressed. I had a good child hood...Noone molested me..noone abused me beyond compare..nothing. Give it aa rest Doc and accept I'm depressed because I'm sick and until I'm NOT sick..I'll continually be SICK OF BEING SICK!!!!!!
Chew on that for a while!
why me?
Aug 09, 2007
