IrishHurler

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It's the end of the summer and I haven't put on any weight.

It's been years since I've been able to say that.  Summer for me is a time for beer, brats and good company.  I'll admit, I did have a few beers and I had a few brats -- but no buns and in limited quantities.  I was worried that I would be the guy going off to barf in the corner of the yard at a party somewhere.  That didn't happen.  I took it easy.  I ate slow.  I did what my band has been teaching me to do.

I'm still down over 30 pounds from when I started in April.  I can get up off the floor without feeling someone has a knee in my back.  The bulging disk in my back hasn't flared up in months.  My son is no longer embarrassed to have his friends see me. I've gone from a tight 48 inch waist to a loose 46 inch waist. 

But still, I'm not there.

I'm still looking forward to the day when I can put on my wedding ring without it cutting off my circulation.  I'm hoping I can do that in another 20 pounds.  I know I can lose 20 pounds by the end of the year.  I just know I can.  (My band is now at 4.5cc's and I don't want to do anymore unless I don't have any more success over this next few months.)

My end goal right now is 240.  I know I'll still be overweight but at least I won't be morbidly obese.  I was very comfortable at 240.  In fact I was pretty comfortable at 265.  But at 240 I could jump super high in taekwondo class.  I was invited to a first of the year taekwondo class last year and I couldn't do most of the things I did a few years ago.  There was a little yoga excercise and I just couldn't bend that way.  By the first of the year I hope to go back to that class and move easier.

And then there's that wedding ring. 

 So lately I've been thinking a lot if I want to get a whole bunch of fills.  I'm really not thinking that's something I want to do.  I've seen the way that a band tightens up.  I'm getting a 2.5 cc fill on Monday -- my first, but do I want to be the guy who has to always have liquid or chewable vitamins?  I don't think so.

If I have a fill greater than 4cc's I think I might have trouble getting vitamins down without chewing them.

That would suck.

So this is going to be my goal -- get my first fill and then start dieting more in earnest.  I don't know if it will do what I want it to but what if I can get away with just having one fill and then I start losing weight and keeping it off?  I could avoid the whole business about not being able to even swallow my morning vitamins.

Now I know the band is tighter in the morning.  I don't mind taking the vitamins at night.  It sucks to have to wrestle with this.  I'm going to take a wait and see approach.  If one fill does it and I can stick to a plan where I lose some weight, I'll stop at just one fill.  If that doesn't do it, I'll re-assess. 

Protein bars are a perfect alternative to meals when you're on the road and don't have time to run home to cook.

Luna (yes I know they're supposed to be made for women) bars have a lot of protein. The Peanut Butter Cookie ones don't suck. The raspberry white choc macadamia nut ones are pretty good.

Pure protein choc peanut butter bars don't suck but I don't think they're as good as the southbeach peanut butter bars.\

I know these aren't glowing reviews but they are quick fixes that can get you through the next 3 or 4 hours before you can get to a real meal.  They'll give you the energy you need and satisfy your hunger.

 Doctor Regan is an interesting guy who I think is genuinely caring and concerned.  He must have a difficult job.  I say this because when patients come out of surgery I would think that most of them regret having done it, at least for a day or two.  That has to wear on him.  At the same time, he has to be heartened to see the positive impact on his patients as the post-op months and years move on.   He has a great staff, and his nurse, Sue Dugan, is spot on excellent.  Her sage counsel and quick responses have enhanced my entire experience.  Dugan is both concerned and caring and you should take advantage of her as a resource.   But you should know, that Dr. Regan is very clear and very firm that if want to get weight loss surgery the success or failure is up to you.  Weight loss surgery is a tool, not an easy fix or a panacea.  I don't know that he would accept lazy or unmotivated patients who want the surgery to change their lives without effort and to Dr. Regan I have to say, "Good for you".  I also owe him a note of thanks for minimizing the scars from the surgery.  I think I will barely be able to see them in a few months.   I appreciate that Dr. Regan didn't sugar coat what I was about to go through and will go through over the next few years.  It wasn't an easy decision for me and he and his staff respected that.   The bariatric patient weight loss support groups are really geared toward people who have had gastric bypass surgery and advocate for gastric bypass surgery.  How can you blame them for supporting the decision they have made -- I am just glad it did not affect my decision to stay with the lap band.  The nurse running the meeting, Mari, was wise and quick to point out that the lap band is the right choice for many people, while gastric bypass is better for others.   The staff dietitians offer great counsel and are wise beyond their years.  However, the pre-op diet consultation with your family should be prior to the 2-week requirement that you start the liquid protein diet.  Fortunately they did make themselves available when I called and offered spot-on advice that made it bearable.   What a sweet sweet feeling it was to speak to other pre-op lap band patients at the pre-op diet consultation.  I am heartened to hear that St. Mary's will soon be structuring fills at the same time each month so patients can talk to other lap band patients.   As for aftercare, I didn't want much but still they followed up with phone calls to check on my healing progress at home.  A 3 week post op visit as been scheduled and I'm looking forward to my first lap band fill at 6 weeks.   I did get the sense that Dr. Regan is a busy man and while I don't think I saw him prior to being put under for anesthesia, I may not have remembered due to some work by a top-notch anesthesiologist.  The next day Dr. Regan stopped by to check on me and stayed until all of my after-care questions had been answered.   Overall, I'm happy to have chosen Dr. Regan.

15 days post-op and I'm relieved.

Why?  Because I was starting to be concerned -- concerned that this surgery meant I would no longer be the strong guy.  I would no longer be able to do hard manual labor.  Today I pushed it.  Yes, I know, doctors orders and all that and yes, it was in the back of my mind.

But today I had some heavy pieces of a tree that needed to be moved.  I split them and tossed them in a wheel barrow and hauled them down to the curb.   I know -- bad, bad man.  But this was more than just a household chore for me -- this was me being able to tell whether I would ever be able to do hard, physically taxing tasks and I completed them without ripping my guts open.

Well, maybe not completed.  A small dose of sanity crept in and after I hauled some of it down to the curb I took an hour break.  Then I moved more down to the curb and I think I'm done for the day.  There will be other days to finish the task but it felt good to be able to accomplish this task -- really, really good.

The day before I went in for surgery that was one of my major concerns.  Will this surgery compromise my ability to do what I identify as a mans responsibilities.  Will this surgery essentially neuter my ability to be a good provider and do what needs to be done around the house.  That day I worked to split and stack about two cords of wood.  It felt good, but I was worried that it may have been a last hurrah.

Nope.

I'm not going to push it anymore today.   After all, I do recognize that my body still does need some rest.  And while we're on the issue of rest, I was able to sleep in my own bed last night.  Yeah, that's right -- my own bed.  It was really, really nice.  As much as I appreciate the comfort that the recliner gave me for the past two weeks, to sleep in my own bed was a major milestone.

I'm looking forward to more milestones as the days, weeks and months progress. 

 I was traveling in Europe a few years back with my uncle and we made a stop in Amsterdam.  

Both of us are mobidly obese.  

A middle-aged woman on the street pointed to us and told two men she was with "look at the two fat men" and laughed.  I stopped my uncle, pointed at the woman and said, "look, that's what happens to all the old prostitutes in the red light district".

Perhaps it wasn't the most tactful, but I'm not one to appease or accept rudeness.

Last night I was in a fair amount of pain.  I had hiccups that were intense.  My old standby of drinking a pint of water straight down is now out of the question.

I didn't know what to do.

So I went into the chat group at lapbandtalk.com and found at least a temporary solution -- peanut butter.

I had the organic smooth stuff in the house (lucky me) and within a few minutes the problem was gone.  Now it did come back later on, but I took another tsp of peanut butter and went to sleep.  This morning I have no problems. 

I didn't expect it, but I went into the hospital last week at this time weighing 290.  I weighed myself on Wed after coming home and I was 299 having eaten little more than broth and jello.  I doubt I took in more than 300 calories on Monday and Tuesday.

It was all water.

It's a week later and my abdomen is still firm around the incisions.  I weight 292 now and my stomach and digestive parts are singing like a very gross symphony.   Things were definately changed with the band.  I'm anxious to see if my continued diet will drop me into the 280's for next week. 

I wonder.... I wonder if that's why so many babies are so fussy and cry a lot and sleep a lot after they're born.  They have never before eaten food and their digestive system is learning how to process food.  Hmmmm....

Well I didn't expect this, but migrating to semi-solid food (cottage cheese in this case) has led to some serious cramping and excessive gas.  

The only way to deal with this appears to be walking and, well, letting the gas out through the back side.

I think changing back will take a while longer.  I'm ok with that since I believe I'm still getting what my body needs with the magic broccoli soup.  But even that is getting old.  

Well, maybe not magic, but it certainly did the trick and I don't feel like I've just run a half marathon.

Earlier today I was feeling light headed and ill.  I had felt weak since the surgery on Monday and have been just dealing with it.  My doctor told me I was to be on liquids this week -- mostly broths and jello, that sort of thing.

Simply put, I was not getting in the nutrients and calories I needed to allow my body to heal.  So I veered slightly off program tonight.  It started out with me making a chicken stock.  I baked a chicken for 70 minutes at 400 degrees.  The idea behind the overcooking was I wanted the chicken to be golden brown and the skin to be carmelized and a little dry when I followed it up by boiling it in water.  That way I could get a richer, better tasting broth.

But there was that frozen broccoli in the freezer....

I decided to change things up.  It's been 5 days since the surgery.  I made the broth, then I mixed in some chicken, some broccoli and some broth and blended it together with the hand blender.  It made a creamy soup that kicked ass.  I ate about 3/4 of a cup and within a few minutes I was no longer light headed or dizzy and I felt good.  Actually good.  In fact, the best I've felt since before the surgery.

There was about 2 talespoons of chicken in what I ate tonight as well as 3 tablespoons of broccoli.  The rest was broth.  Do I feel guilty?  Not really.  I've been vigilant and I believe what I did tonight will put me on a healing path. 

I have gone 6 hours without pain meds and I'm very pleased with how I feel.  I think I wasn't getting the right stuff in me and now I'm all set to start the healing.  Before, I just felt like I was treading water.

Now the healing begins.