WELL,HELLO EVERYONE I have waited some time before telling my story I wonder why doing this has bothered me. Its almost like standing in front of group of people and admitting I have a problem. But then again isn't that what I have been doing my whole life after all its not like you can hide it. Fat is fat but that being said I and the people who have loved me have made my fat special. I am a robunesquerobunesquesp (sp,) smart, self confident beautiful woman. I am some one who can do anything she sets he mind to nothing stands in my way and up until now I believed all of this. I have not been able to get my wt under control oh-ya I could lose a certain amount and feel better but something always stops me froall.This it all.This is not like me I don't do things half way. so why is it that it has always been my wt? I have tried everything but surgery. for the last 10yrs or so I have been watching and wlsearching wls opts. as an er nurse you only see the bad, but everyone who had the surgery no matter what was wrong stated that the only regret they had was waiting so long. for the last 5yrs myself and one of the er docs (who has been like me most of his life he is 5 yrs older) have been looking at where we would go who would do it and studysg any studys that were published. 8 months ago I made a life changing career move and left my beloved er and went to neonatal intenicue care (nicu). Talk about different worlds, er taught me that life can change in the blink of an eye. ICU has reinforced the family values I have. I LOVE THESES BABIES!!! We'll need less to say I went from running all day to standing the wt is harder to control I'm 39yrs old and my ankles hurt my legs swell on my days of I'm not as active I don't have the same energy so I'm deciding to take control of my life and my wt because that seams to be what is controlling it now. Ibaricetxthe baric tx center and have a meeting sch for DEC 8 to speak with the surgeon. I called my Dr friend and ask him " tell me a reason why should not have it done." he said he cant think of one I ask if he wanted to go with me he said he could not because he was having knee replacement surgery he wishes that 5yrs ago he would have acted. So here I am on this site which is the BEST!! and taking control of the only thing in my life which has beaten me this is WAR!! It may have won battles but I WILL WIN THE WAR!!!!