JessyNana
5 lbs gone!
Mar 21, 2008
I was still messing around for a week or two after I got my fill. I had fairly decent restriction, but I was getting hungry in between meals. Of course, I wasn't really following the rules and eating enough protein, and eating it before everything else, so no big surprise there. I had been toying with the idea of going back into my surgeon for a tweak, but thought I should probably actually follow the rules for a while and see how it goes before I do that.
So I really got my ass back on the wagon over here.
I've been tracking my nutrition almost every day at SparkPeople.com. I've made sure I've gotten in all my protein, I'm drinking water like a fiend (and having to pee every 45 minutes as a result), and in the course of about 1.5 weeks, I'm down 5 lbs! I'm extremely stoked about this. I just need to make sure I stay on track with my eating and not get all crazy, and to keep my perspective so that when things slow back down to 1-2 lbs/week I don't get discouraged. For the moment I'm thinking that a tweak is not necessary.
While reading the various topics in the forums here I've been doing a lot of reflecting on my own viewpoints about food. I tend to have a more liberal view on the types of food I should be eating than some other bandsters.
What I mean by that is, I'm a bit of a food purist. I don't feel like artificial sweetners, and high fructose corn syrup, and whatever the hell they have to do to salad dressing and mayonnaise to make it low-fat, are really good for me. It's just a personal opinion thing. So I use real mayonnaise in my tuna salad. I use real butter. I buy the dip made with real sour cream. I don't eat sugar-free or fat-free anything, and I check every single pre-packaged food I buy, from jelly to instant oatmeal, for high fructose corn syrup. My band already limits my portions. I just go an extra step and track my calories to make sure that I can have the regular mayo or a handful of potato chips and still stay within my range for the day and get in enough protein and fiber.
Because here's the thing. I've seen people on this site refer to the band as a "diet with a scar". And I don't agree with that line of thinking. For me, the band is about making a permanent lifestyle change. And a permanent change to a more healthy relationship with food does NOT preclude things like chips or ice cream or cookies or french onion dip or grilled cheese sammiches with bacon or whatever it is that you like. It just means that you need to be mindful of how much of those things you're eating, and how often, and how that fits in with the rest of what you've eaten for that particular day.
I had some really good discussions with my therapist about this. There's nothing wrong with a handful of M&Ms. There IS something wrong with a handful of M&Ms every single day. Moderation. Think it through. And for heaven's sake, don't beat yourself up if you have one bad day. It's not going to undo everything you've done. Just shake it off and do better tomorrow.
I don't call this dieting. I call this eating like a normal person. Skinny people do this on their own without even thinking about it. They don't sit down and eat a whole pint of Ben & Jerry's, or an entire bag of potato chips, or a box of cookies all in one sitting. They don't stuff themselves to finish a huge-sized portion of food that they are served at a restaurant. Their brains and their bodies are already wired to make them stop when they've had a smaller portion. My brain and body aren't wired that way (I SO got jipped), and I've had to take a different road. That road includes having to pay attention, because my brain and body can't do it on their own. So I guess if you want to call it a diet you can but...meh.
I don't anticipate needing to track my food intake every single day forever...but I'm training myself to think about food differently, and part of that process is counting the nutritional content what I'm eating each and every day, for now. But this isn't an all or nothing proposition. If you want a cookie, for goodness sake, eat a cookie. Don't deny yourself until you're about to freak out over it. But just eat ONE cookie. It works, I promise.
So I really got my ass back on the wagon over here.
I've been tracking my nutrition almost every day at SparkPeople.com. I've made sure I've gotten in all my protein, I'm drinking water like a fiend (and having to pee every 45 minutes as a result), and in the course of about 1.5 weeks, I'm down 5 lbs! I'm extremely stoked about this. I just need to make sure I stay on track with my eating and not get all crazy, and to keep my perspective so that when things slow back down to 1-2 lbs/week I don't get discouraged. For the moment I'm thinking that a tweak is not necessary.
While reading the various topics in the forums here I've been doing a lot of reflecting on my own viewpoints about food. I tend to have a more liberal view on the types of food I should be eating than some other bandsters.
What I mean by that is, I'm a bit of a food purist. I don't feel like artificial sweetners, and high fructose corn syrup, and whatever the hell they have to do to salad dressing and mayonnaise to make it low-fat, are really good for me. It's just a personal opinion thing. So I use real mayonnaise in my tuna salad. I use real butter. I buy the dip made with real sour cream. I don't eat sugar-free or fat-free anything, and I check every single pre-packaged food I buy, from jelly to instant oatmeal, for high fructose corn syrup. My band already limits my portions. I just go an extra step and track my calories to make sure that I can have the regular mayo or a handful of potato chips and still stay within my range for the day and get in enough protein and fiber.
Because here's the thing. I've seen people on this site refer to the band as a "diet with a scar". And I don't agree with that line of thinking. For me, the band is about making a permanent lifestyle change. And a permanent change to a more healthy relationship with food does NOT preclude things like chips or ice cream or cookies or french onion dip or grilled cheese sammiches with bacon or whatever it is that you like. It just means that you need to be mindful of how much of those things you're eating, and how often, and how that fits in with the rest of what you've eaten for that particular day.
I had some really good discussions with my therapist about this. There's nothing wrong with a handful of M&Ms. There IS something wrong with a handful of M&Ms every single day. Moderation. Think it through. And for heaven's sake, don't beat yourself up if you have one bad day. It's not going to undo everything you've done. Just shake it off and do better tomorrow.
I don't call this dieting. I call this eating like a normal person. Skinny people do this on their own without even thinking about it. They don't sit down and eat a whole pint of Ben & Jerry's, or an entire bag of potato chips, or a box of cookies all in one sitting. They don't stuff themselves to finish a huge-sized portion of food that they are served at a restaurant. Their brains and their bodies are already wired to make them stop when they've had a smaller portion. My brain and body aren't wired that way (I SO got jipped), and I've had to take a different road. That road includes having to pay attention, because my brain and body can't do it on their own. So I guess if you want to call it a diet you can but...meh.
I don't anticipate needing to track my food intake every single day forever...but I'm training myself to think about food differently, and part of that process is counting the nutritional content what I'm eating each and every day, for now. But this isn't an all or nothing proposition. If you want a cookie, for goodness sake, eat a cookie. Don't deny yourself until you're about to freak out over it. But just eat ONE cookie. It works, I promise.
Starting Over
Mar 07, 2008
I was originally banded on October 20, 2004. I was very successful at the beginning, losing about 40 lbs altogether between the start of my 2-week pre-op protein shake diet from hell and about 6-8 months post-op, but a number of factors contributed to my "lap-band delinquency"; an insurance change that resulted in my after-care no longer being covered. A work schedule that didn't allow for me to get in for adjustments very easily. A feeling that I could do this on my own without the support of other banded people...
The end result of the whole thing is that I'm 3.5 years post-op and I'm back up to my pre-op weight. Granted, it took a LOT longer to get back to this point than it did the first time, but it's still really easy to feel like a total jerk about the whole thing. But I refuse to view myself as a failure. I can still make this work for me. I need to re-dedicate myself to the effort.
On February 28th I went in for my first adjustment in 3 years. I hadn't lost any fluid at all, which makes me wonder how I lost so much restriction - by the time I was able to get in, I was able to eat WAY more than I should have been able to, which made it so easy for me to fall back into old, bad habits.
In order to make sure that this backslide never happens again, I've decided that I need to be more pro-active about seeking out support from communities like this one. I'm hoping that I'll be able to find some other banded friends to help me hold myself accountable for the things that I'm doing, or not doing, as the case may be.
Here's to a new beginning! Cheers! :)
The end result of the whole thing is that I'm 3.5 years post-op and I'm back up to my pre-op weight. Granted, it took a LOT longer to get back to this point than it did the first time, but it's still really easy to feel like a total jerk about the whole thing. But I refuse to view myself as a failure. I can still make this work for me. I need to re-dedicate myself to the effort.
On February 28th I went in for my first adjustment in 3 years. I hadn't lost any fluid at all, which makes me wonder how I lost so much restriction - by the time I was able to get in, I was able to eat WAY more than I should have been able to, which made it so easy for me to fall back into old, bad habits.
In order to make sure that this backslide never happens again, I've decided that I need to be more pro-active about seeking out support from communities like this one. I'm hoping that I'll be able to find some other banded friends to help me hold myself accountable for the things that I'm doing, or not doing, as the case may be.
Here's to a new beginning! Cheers! :)
