jlb2204

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I am 4 months preggers and I am weighing in at 188pnds! so my BMI is almost 25! Even though I should not be looking at my BMI since I am with child! but I keep loosing wt so I am fine with that. I am not trying to, I eat good, but I guess the baby wants to eat my extras!!! So maybe I will weight less then before I was preggers by the time this is all said and done? Only time will tell! I dont want to see the dreaded 2's but if I have to then I will try to keep it very very low! 

Well I will keep you all updated if you care! 

Happy New Year

YAY I AM FINALLY OFFICIALLY IN ONEDERLAND! I have been fighting the low 200's for months now! finally am seeing ones and I am on my period too so I am very happy! I just thought you all should know! hey look at my BMI! it is 27.8! Getting smaller! 

HIP HIP HOORAY!

Well I hit a minor set back with my weight loss. I was stuck for a LONG time and even gained a few pounds, but it was all due to my medicine I got put on for depression called amitriptyline. It caused me to gain weight and retain ALOT of water! yikes! but now I am back on track and loosing again, 6 more pounds and I will finally be in onederland! Remember my goal is 180 so I am pretty darn close! I was beginning to feel like I was doomed to walk the planet in the low 200's for the rest of my life! But I dont think that is the plan!  So wish me luck on getting to my final goal! I have lost 7 pounds in one week now that I stopped taking that stupid pill! It's soooo frustrating! I just want to be 190 by May 7th , cause that is my one year follow up with my surgeon~! 

getting closer to onederland, wearing a size 14!

I am now at 214 pnds. weight loss is a little slower but that happens! It sucks to be so close to onederland yet 15 pnds away! lol! I will be there soon enough I know. So 199 pnds is my newest goal! that will put me almost to my goal goal of 180 pnds. Yee haw! I still can not believe I will be seeing the ones cause I was in the 300s not to long ago, well last year at this time I was 366pnds! whoa momma! lol

I weigh 222pnds~! I cant even believe it! I am sooo close to the ones it is unreal! 180 - 185 pnds is my goal weight! That is seriously not far away at all!  that will have my bmi at 26 but seriously I dont want to look skelatal! I am a big girl and I want to look healthy! Any way that is my exciting news for the week!  : )

I am 227 today and yest was 229! yay!

I am 229pnds! I am soooo close to onederland I can feel it! I never want to be fat again,  though I still think I am bigger then I am. I am always analizing my body and pulling skin up to see what I would look like with a tummy tuck. I am truely happy and blessed, but will it ever be good enough? I need to tone my body more. I slack in that department. I did buy weights though so I need to get back into the groove of serious exercise. I know I am depressed maybe it is winter blues, maybe it is wacked out hormones? cause I have been bleeding for 3 months straight almost! I dont know but I just got put on cymbalta this week, so I am praying that it helps. I am having some side effects like insomnia, dizziness but I was told it should go away. So hopefully this med kicks in and gives me my mental health back! I just am also really stressed out lately about ALOT of things. Some things I shouldnt let get to me but it is easier said then done. I picked up one of  my old nasty habits again but I am going to quit AGAIN! My fiance doesnt know and he would kill me if he knew but right now that is one of the ways I can manage this stress! Anyway things will get better I know so pray for me!  Thanks

Its nice that when I bring pts back lately ALOT of them are making WOW  comments on how much weight I have lost. Other pts are making comments to the other nurses about me when they bring them back too! It is very nice, and I feel happy about that. Yesterday a pt told me she wasnt sure if I was me or not! lol! Well that is my little happy brag for the day!!! YAY

It is funny how people can take the little things for granted. I remember not to long ago like last December I couldnt cross my legs. I also remember that my shoes came untied and I literally could not just bend down and tie it. My skin was sooo tight feeling in my legs and I was so fat that my fiance had to get down on the ground for me (while I was crying because of it) and tie my shoes for me! That is sad. I also recall last year at the same time sitting in my computer chair, and leaning back slightly in it and the next thing I know I am on the floor cause I broke the chair in a few spots! and it was a heavy duty chair! (sad) Also at work I had on 5x scrubs and I ripped them so I was in the bathroom for 15min attempting to sew them up the best I could. That was reallly a wake up call for me! I now wear XL size scrubs!!!  Also last year I went to Craigs Cruisers and just fit in the go cart but you shoulda seen me try to get out of it and while ridding in it I thought I was gonna die it was sooo uncomfortable. and it took me like 5 min to get out. I went to Craigs Cruisers yest and fit comfortably in the go cart, but I could not help while standing in line I had this fear that I wasnt gonna fit or be able to get out. I wonder if that fear will ever go away? Do you ever forget that you arent morbidly obese any more?   YIkes!?  This surgery is alot to get used too and I still have 58 pnds or so to loose till I am at goal but that to me is like 20pnds cause I had almost 200 pnds to loose at the beginning! I am 238pnds now and shocked! I am very happy with this! I can not wait to be 185! That is my goal. But I never want to take the little things for granted again, I dont want to live as if I still am morbidly obese but I dont want to ever forget the hard ships of it either!