jporter
Surgery date - August 15th. Sooo excited. Looking forward to a whole new life.
8/14/06- Well, I have to be at the hospital at the crack of dawn. I'm the first operation of the day. I pray that the doctor and other OR personell will get a good night's sleep and be at their best in the a.m. I'm not sure I'll sleep at all!!!
8/20/06- I've been home for a few days now and starting to feel better. The surgery and the hospital stay went smoothly. I'm following the protien shake part - stage 3 - and I'm finding it hard to get everything in. I get distracted for long preiods of time doing things like exploring this web site!!!
8/28/06- Two weeks tomorrow! Down 16# as of yesterday. Having alot of food thoughts, not a craving for anything specific, just a desire to eat!! I'm afraid that when I get back to solids I'll overeat!!. I'm just taking it one day at a time for now. Scripture tells us not to worry about tomorrow - so I just keep replacing the bad thoughts with good ones.
9/6/06- Went to see Dr.Choi today. I am doing well and she is pleased with my progress. I do need to increase my fluids, though. She felt I was dehydrated plus I've also had a problem with constipation and more fluid will help that , too!! Then I saw the nutritionist and I progressed to stage four of their diet plan. I now can have pureed foods and things like cottage cheese and yogurt. I tried some cottage cheese when I got home. It tasted good and I was pleased and amazed that 1/4 cup filled me up!!! I stopped as soon as I felt full and using every ounce of strength I had and praying the whole time; I returned the uneaten portion to the container and put it in the fridge. All done without taking another bite or licking the spoon. For me this was a major accomplishment.
9/30/06- Back at work for a week now. Everyone was so supportive!!! They all say that they can already see a big difference, I'm down 36# and I have a new hair-do. Feeling good, no major problems so far.
10/22/06- I'm now down 46# and feeling great. My biggest problems are:
1) not exercising regularly.
2) eating too fast and not always watching the before and after fluid restrictions.
3)falling back into old habits. For example, I catch myself taking bites when cooking or putting away leftovers.
I'm happy to say that there is a difference now. Before , I would promise myself to start something like exercising and then after I'd blown it a few times, I would give up altogether. Now, I think about the surgery I've gone through and how stupid and hypocritical it would be to give up . After all, I now have this great tool to help me, and this great web site to support me, so I just look at any mistakes as a bump in the road. I now truly believe that if I hang in there long enough and as my body changes, my mindset will change too. It's a wonderful , liberating new life. I'm no longer a slave to food!!
10/30/06- Feeling great. I have now lost 52#!!!!! I can't believe it!! I'm going to see the doc and nut later this week. I've been tracking my food on Fitday.com and I think I will print out some of the reports and bring them with me. It will help me to remember my questions.
11/14/06 Just got back from a visit with Mom in Vermont. Her memory has gotten so bad, it's really sad. She seems to be content, but I question how long she can remain safely in her current living situation. It was a challenge to stay on track with my foods while I was there. I was able to use the computer in the library to go to fitday.com and enter what I'd eaten. Not enough protein and water and my fats were too high!! Still my total calories were within target and I had lost two more pounds when I got home. (I like Mom's scale - it is 10 pounds light!!!!) I'm down a total of 58# so far and am going to work this week on consistent exercise.
11/17/06 The 15th was DH's birthday. The whole family went out to eat. We had a really nice time and I did well with my food. I was able to come home and track it all on fitday. Last night we called my Mom and after I got off the phone I was overcome with a wave of depression . She didn't remember my visit, sending home a b-day gift for DH , or even how far away I live from her. Even more depressing than the fact that she is slipping away, is the way I dealt with it.. by binging. Of course it was nothing like what I would have done in the past, but that was only because of the limitations of my pouch. It's the behavior that scares me!! I felt hungry, but it was in my head, and I grazed for the rest of the night. The same old telling myself not to, and then doing it anyway. Yikes!! I know I need alternative coping skills, but am at a loss to come up with any satisfactory replacements.
