Katherine T.
|
Before |
3 Months |
6 Months |
10 Months |
1 Year |
19 Months |
Difference |
|
|
Weight |
286 |
224 |
193 |
158 |
149 |
136 |
-150 Pounds |
|
BMI |
52.3 |
41.0 |
35.3 |
28.9 |
27.3 |
24.9 |
-27.4 |
|
Category |
Super |
Morbidly |
Severely |
Overweight |
Overweight |
Normal !! |
Priceless |
|
Size |
Tight 3XL/26/28 |
2XL/22/24 |
M/L/16 |
S/M/10/12 |
S/6/8 |
S/6 |
Indescribable |
|
Bust |
51.50" |
41.00" |
36.00" |
32.25" |
32.00" |
31.00" |
-20.50" |
|
Waist |
49.25" |
41.50" |
36.50" |
29.00" |
28.25" |
27.00" |
-22.25" |
|
Hips |
59.00" |
55.00" |
47.00" |
40.50" |
38.50" |
36.00" |
-23.00" |
|
Thighs |
32.50" |
27.50" |
25.00" |
21.50" |
20.50" |
19.75" |
-25.50" |
|
Calves |
18.75" |
16.50" |
16.00" |
14.75" |
14.00" |
14.25" |
-9.00" |
|
Arms |
18.00" |
15.50" |
14.00" |
12.00" |
11.00" |
10.50" |
-15.00" |
|
Total Measurements Difference to Date |
-115.25" |
||||||
November 2002
My name is Katherine T -- I am currently 5' 2.5" tall and weigh 286 pounds. I have been obese for as long as I can remember, but it was only recently that my weight started to cause physical problems (pain in my ankles & heels, shortness of breath, severe fatigue, etc.). I had been considering weight loss surgery in the back of my mind for a while, but it was the combination of constant pain & discomfort and seeing the news special on Al Roker's story that pushed me into actively pursuing the option. I immediately started researching on the web and ordered every book I could find at Amazon.com on the topic of gastric bypass surgery.
My first contact with Chestnut Surgical & Newton Wellesley Obesity Associates was a phone call to request information on November 18. They were very friendly and promised to send out a registration package -- I received it in the mail 2 days later (November 20) and mailed back my registration form the next morning. Thus begins the waiting ...
December 5, 2002
My husband and I attended an obesity surgery support group meeting at Newton Wellesley Hospital this evening. I had heard that they are typically packed, but the heavy snowstorm that blanketed us during the day kept attendance to a minimum. No post-ops were in attendance, so they scrapped the agenda and had an open forum for questions and discussion with the nutritionist, psychologist, and 2 surgeons. It was nice to hear stories of others who are in the pre-op stage, since many of their concerns and obesity-related experiences are similar to my own. Dr. Gazmuri stopped me on the way out to comment that I was quiet (I didn't ask any questions), but he'll get his fair share during my consultation :-) Truth be told, I just don't like bringing attention to my morbidly obese self any more than absolutely necessary in any group setting.
December 13, 2002
Just when I decided that the post office lost my registration form or I transposed digits in my contact phone number, I finally got the call from NWOA to schedule my consultation -- it will be January 27th at noon. I am on the cancellation list and hopeful that something might come up sooner. Regardless, I am very glad to be over jumping every time the phone rings thinking it is NWOA :-) I was told to start taking vitamins and calcium supplements daily and I immediately called my primary care physician's office and arranged for the referrals.
December 30, 2002
Well, four weeks left until the consultation. I thought I was over anticipating calls, but now I find myself constantly hoping/waiting for a call to let me know that an earlier appointment opened up due to a cancellation :-)
My entire immediate family now knows that I will be having the surgery and they are all very supportive (if a bit worried). I got a number of books & guided imagery tapes on surgery/recovery for Christmas, all of which have been added to the 'to be read before surgery' pile. I have read through almost all the books I bought/borrowed on gastric bypass and am very eager to get on with the process. I was told that surgery dates are currently running about 4 months after the consultation date, so my surgery will probably be in late May/early June. That is closer than I anticipated, but still seems so far off!
Last night I stopped at my sister's house and my nephews (ages 3 & 4) were playing X-Men on their Playstation. I was hurt when they commented that a particularly large character on the game is "fat just like Aunt Katherine." I know that my weight is the first thing people notice/remember about me, but it is still painful to have something like that voiced. I will be glad when people notice me for who I am rather than how fat I am.
January 6, 2003
Sally from Dr. Gazmuri's office called around 9:15 this morning -- they had a cancellation for noon and wanted to know if I could make it. I was completely psyched to get in three weeks early! I immediately left work and raced home for all my paperwork, finished writing out my questions for Dr. Gazmuri, and headed off for the hospital.
I met with Cindy, the psychologist, first. We discussed my support structure, my past, my family, and how I am preparing for surgery and post-op life. Cindy was able to answer most of the questions I had about the hospital stay, e.g., that Newton Wellesley has special bariatric beds to help you into a standing position, the catheter comes out after 48 hours, the NG tube normally comes out while in the recovery room, etc.
Afterwards, I watched a video discussing the risks & complications of gastric bypass surgery. There was nothing too shocking since I had done my research online and through books beforehand.
Next I met with Sue, the nutritionist. She took my weight and a "before" picture, then we talked a lot about my food diary, my eating problem areas, things I should do now to lose weight before surgery, and the post-op dietary situation. She was pleased that I gave up fast food as a New Year's resolution since her theory is "if it has a drive-thru, drive by it." They would like to see me lose a few pounds before my next appointment.
After meeting with Sue, I was sent back to the waiting room for a little while. I was then called in by Dr. Gazmuri, who was great about taking the time to answer my questions. We discussed the risks and the care plan for before and after surgery. Like Sue, he also stressed that losing weight and exercising before surgery will make the surgery easier, my recovery faster, etc. He requested that I bring my husband along with me next time.
I then set up my next appointment (Feb. 7) and met with Sally, who gave me the all-important "Passport" binder with information on diet, exercise, post-op life, the mentoring program, and other related topics. My last stop for the afternoon was in the hospital lab to get blood drawn.
Overall, I couldn't be happier with Dr. Gazmuri and his staff. Everyone was friendly, patient, and well-informed. I was told that I can expect a letter within 2 weeks outlining my surgery date and the dates for the pre-op testing, pre-op support group (different from the regular nightly support group), and other appointments. I can't wait to find out my surgery date!! :-)
January 8, 2003
Today I exercised for the first time in over a year. I went down to the gym at work and found my locker, sneakers, and workout clothes exactly as I had left them. The sweatpants were tight, but I geared up and hit the treadmill without missing a beat. I quickly discovered that I am VERY out of shape. Within less than 5 minutes, my back was screaming for me to stop and my legs were getting mighty tired. I pressed on for 15 minutes total, getting in a paltry half mile. While my pace and endurance were discouragingly slow, I am proud of myself for working out at all. Starting to work out again is a big step toward adopting a healthier lifestyle. The best part is that with the help of WLS, I know that I will succeed in losing weight and keeping it off this time :-)
January 11, 2003
I have a surgery date!! My surgery is scheduled with Dr. Gazmuri for the morning of May 15, 2003. I will be calling on Monday to find out about being put on a cancellation wait list for an earlier date.
Yesterday I joined the local Curves for Women fitness center. I had never been to one before, but I was hearing the name over and over again from others in the gastric bypass process and decided to check it out. Their basic setup is a series of resistance machines separated by small platforms in a circular layout. You can start anywhere in the circle and you move around the circle, alternating between marching/walking on the platforms and working on the machines. I was a bit shocked and skeptical to find out that the time on each machine/platform is only 35 seconds, but it was a good workout. I went again this afternoon. The only drawback is that their hours are awful -- they open late, close early, and have a whopping 3 hours of time open on Saturday morning. That makes it tough to get there during their hours of operation.
January 24, 2003
Last night I underwent a sleep study at Sturdy Hospital in Attleboro, Massachusetts. The technician, Ray, was very friendly and helpful, but the overall experience was less than pleasant. I found it very difficult to sleep with all the wires and equipment attached -- electrodes glued to my head, face, neck, chest and legs, a microphone taped to my chin, a pulse oximeter on my finger, a contraption taped over my upper lip with prongs going into my nose, and four bands around my chest and stomach. I felt like I would break something if I moved. The bed was hard, it was noisy, and the "private room" was a three-walled bay of about 7' by 10' containing a bed, a chair, a rolling table, a sink, a video camera and medical equipment. Not exactly a comfortable night at home -- I've never been so happy to get up and dressed at 5:30 a.m.! :-) I immediately came home and slept until late afternoon, grateful that I had taken the day off of work. For anyone else having a sleep study, I would highly recommend bringing a watch. I kept waking up during the night and it was very frustrating not knowing if I had been asleep for minutes or hours.
January 30, 2003
I finally got the results of my sleep study back. The good news is that I do not have sleep apnea. The bad news is that the test was abnormal, so I have to see an ear, nose and throat specialist in a couple of weeks.
My husband and I attended the pre-op information session at Newton Wellesley Hospital, at which Drs. Gazmuri & Thayer gave a presentation on various aspects of the surgery and then hosted a Q&A session. Even with all the reading & research I have done over the past few months, it was still a helpful session. I learned things specific to NWOA, such as that their mortality rate is lower than the national average (they've lost 4 patients out of roughly 1,075).
February 6, 2003
My husband and I attended a fabulous support group meeting tonight. The speaker had gone from over 550 pounds to somewhere in the low 200s in the past year after having gastric bypass. It was amazing to see the before pictures, because seeing him in person I never would have guessed he had once been severely obese. It was very inspiring to hear his story.
February 7, 2003
My husband and I met with Dr. Gazmuri for a follow-up meeting today. Dr. Gazmuri was very happy to see that I had lost 9 pounds since we met last month. We primarily talked about what I am doing to prepare for surgery, my husband's concerns, my concerns about pain, and the emotional issues to be dealt with post-op. They are looking into running two operating rooms rather than just one on Tuesdays if they can get the resources, and promised to contact me if they have an earlier opening due to that or due to a cancellation. I was a little dismayed to find out that they only submit insurance paperwork 2 months before surgery (I am still three months and one week away), so I won't find out about insurance until sometime in March.
February 11, 2003
I had my weight and measurements taken at Curves when I went in for my workout today. I have lost 15 pounds (down from 286 to 271) and 8 inches in the past month :-) The bummer is that I haven't noticed any of it. I guess I shouldn't be too upset about that since the whole purpose of losing weight right now is to be healthier for surgery & recovery. I will worry about the pounds and inches AFTER surgery.
Just to clarify, I have not been a perfect angel about eating. There are days that it takes everything I have not to pull into a fast food drive-thru. I have an entire list of foods I want to have before surgery ... eggs benedict, pina colada rum cake, filet mignon with caramelized onions, sweet corn tamale cakes, and the list goes on. I know I may be able to have a bite or two of them post-op, but I feel better knowing that I am able to have and fully enjoy them one last time before surgery. If I didn't, I know I would feel ripped off and bitter if I can not (or choose not to) have them again post-op. The trick is that I have only been indulging in list items once or twice a week. The rest of the week I have protein shakes, salads, whole grains, and other "good" foods.
February 14, 2003
I received an approval letter from the insurance company today! That was a great Valentine's Day surprise, especially since I was pretty sure I wouldn't hear from them until next month. It is a great relief to have that approval, since that was the last hurdle. There is no way we could have possibly afforded the surgery without insurance, so the worry that they might not approve had been hovering over me like a dark cloud for weeks. Now that I know it will happen, I am completely psyched!!
March 4, 2003
Not much to report -- the waiting is still driving me crazy and I still lunge at the phone every time it rings just in case it is the surgeon's office calling with an earlier date. No luck yet. My scheduled surgery date is just over 10 weeks away now. While I was at the pharmacy today, I picked up some of the things that the surgeon's office recommends (gauze, tape, thermometer, Tylenol, GasEx, etc.).
I have gained back 2 pounds of the 15 that I lost. I slipped on ice and fractured my ankle, which brought the workouts to a screeching halt. This is my fourth week with the air cast on, so I should be free and clear soon. The sooner I can get it off and get back into a regular workout routine, the better off I will be.
March 5, 2003
I just got a call from Renee at Dr. Gazmuri's office. They had a cancellation, so my surgery has been moved from May 15th to April 1st! I can't even begin to express how excited I am at this news. Less than 4 weeks to go now!!!
March 17, 2003
Getting closer ... but time is still dragging :-) Last week I attended the pre-op support group meeting, at which the two Sues (nurse & dietician) reviewed the blended diet and what to expect the day of pre-op testing, the day of surgery, and during the hospital stay. It was very helpful. The only traumatic news is that they give you an abdominal injection of Heparin when you get to the hospital on the morning of surgery. That wouldn't be so bad except that they do this BEFORE you are sedated in any way. I know this should be the least of my concerns considering everything else my abdomen will be subjected to that day, but for some reason I am fixated on that injection. The nurse said it's nothing and will feel like a bee sting. That may be true, but bee stings hurt!!! (Yes, I am a wimp when it comes to pain.)
This morning I made arrangements to rent a hospital bed for the initial time home after surgery. Insurance won't cover it, but it seemed worth the cost to be able to stay on one level of the house and not sleep on a flat bed right away. We have a recliner, but it is the only chair in the house that I can't get out of :-)
I got my disability paperwork from the surgeon's office on Friday. My employer is not privy to the nature of my surgery, so I was very happy to find that the note from the surgeon's office simply states that I will be having "major abdominal surgery" and therefore need to be out of work for 4 to 6 weeks.
March 30, 2003
Now that I am in the final hours, I am so excited I could burst (although that would undoubtedly delay my surgery) :-) I still have one day left, but everything is packed up, the grocery shopping is done, the hospital bed has been delivered to our living room, and I am ready to go. I feel like a little kid the night before Christmas.
Last week I went for my pre-op testing. It took nearly 4 hours in all, but most of that time was spent waiting. First I went for an abdominal ultrasound to gauge the condition of my gallbladder. I wish they would just take the darn thing out so that I wouldn't have to worry about it, but apparently they only take it out if there are gallstones. Next, I went up to Dr. Gazmuri's office and met with a nurse (Nancy) who re-iterated the importance of not having any last hurrahs and answered my last minute questions. They took my weight and gave me the final okay for surgery, then sold me the Bari-Buddy bear and abdominal binder that I requested. My next stop was the Wikstrom Surgical Center, where I signed my life away on what seemed like 101 consent forms and requested a private room. I then met with Mary, a surgical center nurse, who took down my medical history, showed me how to use an incentive spirometer for breathing exercises, and went through what to expect during my hospital stay. Next was a physical administered by Aric, a 3rd-year med student, followed by a meeting with the anesthesiologist. The last stop for the day was in the lab to have blood drawn. The most painful part of the experience was trying to find a space in the parking garage -- somehow I always end up parked on the roof.
April 24, 2003
I made it to the other side! My surgery went well and I haven't had any major complications. I had hoped to update the site more frequently with my progress, but I wasn't feeling up to climbing the stairs and sitting at the computer until this week. I'll try to recap the past few weeks as best I can.
Day of Surgery - April 1, 2003
My surgery was in the afternoon, so waiting all morning to leave for the hospital was torture. I almost ate a cracker -- I was cleaning up and had absentmindedly started to open a box of Cheez-Its before I realized what I was doing. I would have been pretty upset (and embarrassed!) if my surgery had to be postponed because I accidentally ate a Cheez-It the morning of surgery! :-)
Things went pretty quickly once we arrived at the hospital. I was given my lovely hospital bracelets at the Wikstrom Surgical Center registration desk, then my husband and I were wisked upstairs to the pre-op waiting area on the second floor. I changed into a hospital gown and was covered with heated blankets -- life was good. Then the nurse came in for the abdominal injection of Heparin. That was not so good. It burned and stung for about 15 minutes after the injection, so much so that I checked to make sure the needle hadn't broken off under my skin. Fortunately that was the worst part of the process. The two IVs went in without a problem (one in my left hand and the other in my left forearm). The pre-op nurses, anesthesiologist, surgical nurse, and Drs. Gazmuri & Thayer all came in to say hello at various points in time. Everyone was very friendly and upbeat, which helped to put me at ease. My huband and I said our goodbyes at 1:30 and I was wheeled to the operating room. I remember moving to the operating table, but as soon as I was there the lights started swimming over my head and I fell asleep. The next thing I remember is half-waking in recovery in a fog a couple of times. The first time I was being reprimanded for trying to remove the oxygen mask and get up, the second time I was completely nauseated and had to use every ounce of energy to croak out that I was going to be sick (they put something in the IV to stop that and I fell right back to sleep). The third memory is being wheeled down to my room. The student doctor said that I must be doing well since I tried to escape from the recovery room. My husband arrived shortly after I got to the room -- it was great to see him.
I felt great for about 24 hours after surgery. I was asleep most of the time, but I spent the time I was awake telling people that it wasn't as bad as I expected. I spoke too soon -- by mid-afternoon on Tuesday, the pain kicked in with a vengeance. I honestly don't know if I would have gone through with surgery had I known how much pain would be involved in the first week.
The Hospital Stay - April 1 - 4, 2003
The people at the hospital were great. The student doctors came in several times a day beginning at about 5:00 a.m. to check on me. Dr. Gazmuri would stop in later in the morning, and then again in the evening with Drs. Partridge & Thayer. The nurses seemed overworked, but were generally friendly and helpful. The kitchen staff sent up a vase of daffodils on my tray the day after surgery, which was a very nice (and unexpected) surprise.
Overall, I was pleased with the hospital. There were, however, some communication issues that concerned me. The first was that I was told I would be progressed from clear juice to broth & Carnation Instant Breakfast by the time I left (this was told to me both before and during the hospital stay by the doctors). Instead, I got the same exact "meal" every meal for my entire entire stay (3 one-ounce cups of diet cranberry juice and 3 one-ounce cups of NuBasics clear protein drink). That was frustrating. The other problem was that I was not given my normal maintenance medications for asthma & depression. By day 3, I was wheezing, my oxygen was low, and was crying for no reason -- all the result of not having had my medications for days. I hadn't questioned the absence of medication because I figured the hospital staff must have had a reason for stopping all my drugs ... it turns out they didn't. I guess the lesson learned is to question things if you think they are wrong, because the hospital DOES make mistakes.
I had been concerned about how to fill the time during my days at the hospital, but I didn't unpack my books/magazines or so much as turn on the TV the whole time I was there. To be honest, I'm not sure what I did. I slept a lot and did my required walking tours around the surgical floor. I wasn't up to talking on the phone or having visitors. I was glad to have the catheter removed on my third day in the hospital, but getting out of bed to go to the bathroom was torturous at best. The Bari-Buddy bear became my best friend since keeping it pressed against my stomach helped with the pain. It was definitely not a great week in my life.
First Week at Home - April 4 - 11, 2003
I left the hospital on Friday morning. Despite having a rented hospital bed, I could not get out of bed the first night -- I was in severe pain that was exacerbated by any movement. Fortunately my husband was an angel, waking up every 3 hours to bring me my pain medication during the night. The pain continued for several days -- I spent 99% of my time either sleeping or pacing around waiting for the next dose of pain medication. I took Roxicet until Monday morning, when a night of horrible drug-induced hallucinations and nightmares led me to dump the rest of the bottle down the drain. I tried to get something more powerful than Tylenol but not as evil as Roxicet from the surgeon's office Monday morning, but their resolution was to call in a prescription for Vicodin (to which I am allergic) late Monday afternoon. Too tired to keep trying, I gave up and grudgingly switched to Tylenol. I was still in pain, but that was tempered by the fact that I was losing weight at a rate of about 3 pounds a day.
On the tenth day after surgery, I returned to the hospital to have my staples removed. Dr. Gazmuri was out on vacation, so I saw Dr. Partridge instead. Surprisingly, it didn't hurt at all to have the staples removed. I was terrified of having them taken out because the incision was obviously not ready to just be set free to fend for itself, but they reinforced it with a row of glued-on Steri-strips.
About a half hour into the trip home from the hospital, I noticed a couple of wet spots on the front of my sweater. When I pulled out the sweater to look, I found that I had sprung a leak. The entire bottom of my sweater (and top of my pants and the seatbelt) were completely soaked through with a sticky, clear reddish-orange fluid. In a panic, we raced back to the hospital. I wasn't in pain, but I was pretty frightened by the volume of fluid coming out of the incision -- by the time we got back to Dr. Gazmuri's office, my clothes were so wet that I could have wrung them out. As it turns out, it was not a medical concern -- it was just seroma fluid. Dr. Partridge and the nurse taped gauze over the hole, helped me dry off my clothes a bit, and sent us on our way.
Second Week at Home - April 12 - 18, 2003
On Saturday, we spent the night in the emergency room at Milford Hospital -- only this time it was because my husband Tim was having abdominal pain. It turned out that he had gallstones and would need to have his gallbladder removed ASAP. They wanted to admit him to Milford, but he preferred to go through Newton-Wellesley Hospital since we had just gone through my surgery and he was familiar with their surgical process. His consultation & pre-op work were done on Tuesday and his surgery was on Friday. While I was at the hospital, I stopped in to Dr. Gazmuri's office because the bottom Steri-strips (over the area of my leak) had fallen off and the incision now had a gaping (and still leaking) hole. They had a nurse look at my incision, but still felt that the hole and persisting leak were not a problem. Once again they taped on the gauze and sent me on my way.
I went to the hospital with Tim on Friday for his surgery. Some of the pre-op staff recognized me from a couple of weeks before and said that it looked like I was doing great. I decided to stay at the Doubletree hotel near the hospital so that I could minimize the need to drive back and forth. My sister Amanda and I waited at the hospital until we got a call from the surgeon to let us know that Tim was in recovery, then went to the hotel for a bit before returning to the hospital to visit. Tim was doing well, but we didn't stay long (Tim & I both needed naps). Amanda & I returned to the hotel, where I faced the challenge of ordering room service on a gastric bypass blended diet. I ended up ordering the kid's spaghetti and just eating the sauce off of it. Sleeping in a flat bed (as opposed to a hospital bed) was also a challenge, but with the help of 5 pillows and a folded up blanket I was able to cocoon myself enough to be comfortable.
Third Week at Home - April 18 - 25, 2003
Tim returned home from the hospital on Saturday. Getting home was a trick. I am still not feeling up to driving long distances -- it is uncomfortable to twist around and I get tired & dizzy unexpectedly. However, since he was not supposed to drive, I picked him up at the hospital. The combination of his pain medication and being a passenger was making him sick, so he ended up taking over the wheel part way home so that he could control when he stopped to get sick on the side of the road. It was pretty pathetic. While I am sure that having abdominal surgery of his own gave him a new appreciation for what I had been through, having two people recovering from surgery at the same time is not a good situation. If nothing else, anything that fell on the floor was as good as gone since neither of us could bend far enough to pick things up :-)
I lost 24.5 pounds in the week after I got home from the hospital, then managed to stay at exactly the same weight for 10 days despite the blended diet, walking, etc. By the end of those 10 days I was angry, bitter, and crying constantly. I still don't understand how it was physically possible to go that long without losing weight under the circumstances. However, the plateau ended a few days ago and I am now losing at a rate of about a half pound per day. All in all, I am now 36 pounds below what I weighed when I started this journey.
My energy level is increasing from the sleep-filled days of the first week, and I am walking nearly a mile a day. I still get exhausted unpredictably -- yesterday I was full of energy and decided to take a shower. As I was rinsing the shampoo out of my hair, I was suddenly so tired that I thought I would keel over if I didn't get to bed immediately. After a short nap, I was fine. That also happens if I walk too far -- I go from being okay to seriously considering lying down on the sidewalk to take a nap. Hopefully that is something that will resolve itself soon.
I haven't had many problems with nausea & vomiting. When I do throw up, I know why (I ate too fast, I took a sip of water too soon after eating, etc.). I can tell it is going to happen right away -- it starts as a feeling that whatever I ate or drank is stuck in or just above my stomach. Within a few minutes, I start feeling nauseous and salivating. Vomiting itself isn't so bad -- the quantity is very small and there isn't vile stomach acid involved. It is rather like having the food come right back out intact, which is unusual but definitely preferable. Forgive me for the details, but I am fascinated at how different the experience is from pre-op vomiting.
Anyway, my next appointment with Dr. Gazmuri's office is on Monday. This appointment is to take the next step in eating, moving from the blended diet to solid foods. I am very much looking forward to this, since the only thing I've really chewed since surgery is my Flintstones vitamins. Food just isn't the same when it is liquefied. I'll post again next week to update you all on my progress.
Fourth Week at Home - April 26 - May 2, 2003
I am finally able to eat 'real' (as in un-blended) food again! Yesterday I had my 1 month follow-up appointments with Dr. Gazmuri and the dietician. All is going well. The bottom of my incision is still separated and leaking a bit, but Dr. Gazmuri said that it should close up soon.
I was a little surprised at the volume of prescriptions and supplements required now that I am at the 1 month mark -- in addition to Zantac twice a day and 2 children's chewable vitamins, I now have to take B12 supplements, calcium supplements twice a day, an iron supplement (Vitron-C), and Actigall twice a day. When I picked up the Actigall, I noticed that birth control pills were listed as a drug interaction on the CVS drug information sheet. I talked to the pharmacist and found out that the estrogen in birth control pills pretty much cancels out the effect of the Actigall. I guess THE pill is one less pill I have to take :-) Of course, now I have to see my PCP to get a non-hormonal form of birth control. Arrgh.
I asked the dietician about my bouts of dizziness and exhaustion, and was told that it is probably a simple matter of dehydration. Looks like I will have to try harder to get in more than a quart a day. Being a former chugger, I have trouble drinking all day in small sips ... I feel like I am trying to fill a bucket with an eyedropper.
After leaving the hospital, I went grocery shopping. I never realized how hard it is to avoid sugar! It seemed like it was in everything ... bread, crackers, ketchup, mayonnaise. I ended up having to go to whole-foods stores (Trader Joe's and Bread & Circus) to find sugar-free alternatives for several items, some with fructose and others just unsweetened. I was never so happy that the deli at the grocery store has the express option (placing the order by computer and picking it up from a bin 15 minutes later). Had they not, I probably would have been killed for buying a few slices here and a few slices there of each item I wanted :-)
My first meal was chicken salad (just ground chicken breast with lowfat, no-sugar-added mayo) on half of a whole wheat mini-pita. It looked small, but I only got about half way through it before I suddenly got the post-Thanksgiving-dinner-I'm-full-and-about-to-burst feeling. Somehow the portion sizes seem a lot smaller in "real" food than they did in liquids -- that is going to take some getting used to! I'll have to get some really tiny plates to fake myself out. So much for wedding china ... I think my best bet now is a doll-size tea set :-)
In any event, my weight is down to 248 pounds. Despite a 38 pound loss (286 to 248), I still don't see or feel a difference ... I can't figure out where the heck the weight is coming from. Regardless, I find it amazing that I have lost more than I could comfortably carry even before surgery (the rough equivalent of 2 buckets of cat litter!). Hopefully my body will get a clue and catch up with the scale soon!!!
May 5, 2003
I have lost a few more pounds in the past few days, now weighing in at 245 pounds for a loss of 41 pounds overall. My BMI has dropped from 52.3 pre-op to 44.8, so while still morbidly obese, I am no longer in the super obese category :-) The weight seems to be coming from my legs, as my pants are all getting way too long ... either that or I am getting shorter! Unfortunately I can't switch to a smaller size since my stomach, hips & thighs are not shrinking in proportion to my legs. I know that my wrists are also smaller -- I can circle my wrist with my thumb & index finger and have them touch without a gap now (previously there was a gap of about an inch when I tried to do that). I don't think there is a visible difference yet, but I will have a better idea of that once I have a picture for comparison with the mug shots taken the night before surgery.
Eating has been tricky for the past couple of days. I seem to be having problems with meat and eggs. I tried marinated grilled chicken and it was too dry -- no matter how much I chewed it, I couldn't get it to an acceptable consistency to swallow. I had the same problem with the chicken in the soup I bought from Bread & Circus. Turkey lunch meat was moist enough, but it came right back up. Ditto for ham. I had a few bites of egg salad last night and it sat in my stomach like a brick, leaving me with nausea and dry heaves over an hour later. I have been able to tolerate blended foods and cheese, so I am going to go back to things I know are okay (cheese slices, protein shakes, baby food fruits, etc.) for a few days to see if that helps.
My hair is starting to fall out. I know that is to be expected, but that doesn't make it any less emotionally painful. I was squeezing the water out of my hair after washing it yesterday and there were clumps of hair left in my hands. When all was said and done, I lost enough hair during one shower to provide a full hair transplant for a Barbie doll (or make a flowing toupee for the cat). I am getting no sympathy whatsoever from my essentially bald husband -- he seems to think it is funny.
On a happier note, my incision has FINALLY stopped leaking. It took 5 weeks after surgery, but it looks like the bottom of the incision is finally closing up. I was starting to think that it would never heal :-)
May 12, 2003
It has been a slow weight loss week -- I have only lost 2 pounds since last Wednesday. I suppose better 2 pounds than nothing, but it is still frustrating when the weight loss slows down like this. Regardless, I am halfway to being below 200 pounds again ... that was a happy realization.
Now for the strange news -- I **AM** getting shorter! I've thought that for about a month and my husband mentioned something yesterday. We got out the tape measure and sure enough I am shrinking vertically! I've been 5' 2.5" since high school -- for simplicity I usually rounded that to 5' 2". As of last night, I am 5' 1.5" ... a whole inch shorter than I was before surgery (6 weeks ago). How weird is that? Like I wasn't short enough already :-)
June 1, 2003
Today is the two-month anniversary of my surgery! My weight loss has been very slow for the past few weeks, to the extent that I only lost 7 pounds this month (which is both frustrating and absolutely pathetic given that this was only my second month out of surgery). Lack of regular exercise has to be the big factor, because I have been eating, drinking and taking all my vitamins according to plan. I got fed up with myself on Wednesday and joined a large local gym. I still have my membership at Curves, but I need to cancel it because it just isn't a good fit for me post-op ... I would need to skip certain stations, I want more aerobic variety, I miss the satisfaction of seeing improvement in weight load when strength training, and their hours of operation are just awful (no weekends plus they open late in the morning and close early in the evening). I've been to the gym daily since joining, putting in 2 miles a day on the treadmill and/or elliptical trainers. I feel like I got hit by a bus and I have blisters on both heels that required stumbling into a store immediately after leaving the gym to buy band-aids (more on that in a minute), but hopefully the effort will pay off in faster weight loss. I didn't go through surgery to lose a measly 7 pounds a month. I have an orientation with a personal trainer on Monday to pull together a routine that includes strength training. I would like to try Pilates classes, but the instructor felt that I shouldn't sign up until I have clearance for intense abdominal work (e.g., crunches). Because I had an open incision, that means it will probably be a few more months -- the last thing I need is to rush into it and end up with a hernia.
I mentioned in the last paragraph that I ended up with blisters on my heels. The reason is that my sneakers are now too big! My feet were sliding in and out of the back of them while I was walking on the treadmill, resulting in pain & blisters. I went to the Reebok outlet to get new sneakers and found that my shoe size, which was 9 wide width pre-op, is down to 8.5 regular width! I didn't see that one coming :-)
In general, things are going well. I have occasional discomfort to the right of my incision, but my understanding is that this is the normal result of the internal stitches pulling as the abdominal muscles continue to heal. I still get sick on occasion, but it is invariably because of eating too fast or not chewing well enough. I haven't tried anything with sugar in it, so I am still going on the assumption that dumping is a possibility -- it is safer to make the assumption that it will make me sick than to test the theory and risk finding out that I have no adverse reaction to sugar. I don't have any cravings for sugary foods (which is amazing considering that I had cravings for sweet food all the time pre-op), so this hasn't been an issue.
Despite the slow pace of my recent weight loss, I am down 48 pounds overall, 15 pounds from before surgery and the remaining 33 post-op. That is still an average loss of 3.9 pounds a week post-op, so I guess I shouldn't be too disappointed. Hopefully with the addition of an intense exercise regimen I will be able to report much higher losses next month! :-)
June 30, 2003
Tomorrow is the 3 month anniversary of my surgery, and all I can say is wow -- the past three months have gone by so fast!
Dr. Gazmuri indicated that his expectation is for patients to lose 30% of excess weight in the first 3 months after surgery. I have lost 62 pounds thus far, or 35.2% of my excess weight, weighing in at 224 as of this morning. I am pretty happy about that. I have been losing .5 to 1 pound a day for the past week, so I am also thrilled that the pace of my weight loss has picked up again.
This month I figured out that while I don't dump on sugar like some others do, even the smallest amount completely knocks me out. I inadvertently got a tiny smudge of frosting on the side of my hand earlier this month while pulling a cupcake out of a box for my nephew. I licked it off without even thinking about it, and within minutes was suddenly so tired I thought I would keel over. Later this month I had the same thing happen consistently whenever I ate chicken that had been marinated in teriyaki sauce. Even a couple of grams of sugar causes me to lose focus and go into "death is imminent, must lie down" mode. While I am kind of glad there is some evil involved to keep me away from sugar, the zero tolerance policy my body has taken makes finding "safe" foods very challenging -- it seems like there are hidden sugars in just about everything. My favorite of the names given to hidden sugars is "evaporated organic cane juice" -- that was what was in the teriyaki sauce. Very sneaky.
I haven't vomited in weeks, although I admittedly still have episodes when I eat too fast and end up feeling absolutely horrible until the food digests. I don't know if I will ever completely resolve that little behavioral flaw. I am still losing my hair, but I have gotten used to that. I feel like I have lost enough hair to cover my husband's head at this point, but my hair was thick enough to begin with that I still have plenty left for now. It is more of a nuisance than anything else. The only other thing that has been a problem recently is acidity. I can't drink orange juice or acidic teas because they burn my stomach. A couple of weeks ago I was having acid-related pain anytime I didn't eat for more than an hour or two. Dr. Gazmuri put me right back on Zantac and that resolved the problem right away. All things considered, I think I am doing quite well :-)
While I have made progress, I was rudely reminded of how far I still have to go while watching America's Funniest Home Videos last Friday. I was shocked by one of the videos, which started by panning over a beach scene in Hawaii and ended with the backside view of an oversized person leaning over doing something or other, with a voiceover to the effect of "this is the beach at Waikiki ... but this [panning over to the person's backside] is the big island". Yeah, hardy-har-har ... very funny. The person pictured was probably 200 pounds at most, and the audience laughed like crazy. What shocked me even more was that this particular video was chosen as one of the top three for awards at the end! Yes, discrimination of the overweight is alive and well. It amazes me that it is so publicly acceptable to torment people because of their weight. I may be losing the pounds physically, but I will never forget the emotional pain of being obese in today's world.
July 30, 2003
I am still 2 days away from my 4 month anniversary, but I had time to post tonight so I am jumping the gun a little bit on my monthly profile update. I will try to get some 4 month post-op pictures to post on the site in the next few days.
I started this journey in the "super obese" category (man, was that a slap in the head to discover! I knew I was large, but had no idea I was that large). By the end of the first month, I had dropped down to "morbidly obese". As of today, I have dropped down one more notch to "severely obese" ... I'm sure others here will understand the excitement in that. While I am still over 100 pounds overweight and weigh nearly double the ideal weight for someone my height, I am making solid progress.
I am starting to see a pattern in my weight loss. I seem to lose weight rapidly in the last week or two of each month (a pound or so a day), then go up a pound or two out of nowhere and stay the same for the weeks until the end of the next month. This is the third month out of four that I have seen this happen. As frustrated as I sometimes get on a day-to-day basis while my weight is staying the same, I know that my body is just playing catch-up. When I look at the big picture I feel that things are going as well as I could hope for.
I feel absolutely fabulous. I was noticing just today that I can do a lot more without getting winded. As an example, the trip from my desk at work to my car in the parking lot involves walking up several flights of stairs and a hill. Before surgery, I would arrive at the car feeling like an unhealthy 100 year old woman, my lungs and legs burning and my breath coming in wheezy gasps. It would often take a several minutes and the use of a rescue inhaler for my heart rate and breathing to stabilize so that I could actually leave the parking lot. Four months later, I bound up the stairs and get to the car feeling perfectly fine.
This month my hips finally started shrinking, allowing me to drop from size 24 (3X) to size 18 pants and size large shirts! Now that I have started wearing smaller clothes, I am getting amazing feedback from people (including strangers). The rapid size changes have made keeping up with clothing a challenge. I had put hope in the clothing exchange at the Newton Wellesley Obesity Associates support group meetings, but they are too much of a zoo to be useful. There is no organization to it -- the "exchange" is a massive pile of clothes on a table surrounded by a crowd of vultures (of which I was one). Finding something in a particular size is nearly impossible -- I came in with a large box of clothes and left with one pair of jeans. In retrospect, I probably should have taken the box so I could cut out some arm holes and wear it as a shirt ... I'm getting about that desperate :-)
Seriously, I did end up swallowing my pride and going shopping at the local Salvation Army. I was a little dismayed to find that they sort items by color rather than size -- that made it a very l-o-n-g shopping trip, but I did find some really nice stuff to get me through the next few sizes on my weight loss journey. I dared to buy a pair of size 12 jeans. I have NEVER in my adult life worn less than a 14, and even the 14s in my past were only items that happened to be generously cut. Even as a child, I always had to shop in the plus size departments -- I still remember being mortally embarrassed by having to shop in the "Pretty Plus" department at Sears while my siblings and friends went off into the land of skinny clothes. I am cautiously optimistic that this time I will break the size 14 barrier and explore the world of tiny clothes that has always been out of reach.
My hair is still falling out at an alarming clip. I shed like a persian cat, but surprisingly there doesn't seem to be a noticeable difference overall. Hopefully the hair loss will slow down before it creates an obvious cosmetic impact. I've heard other people say that they take zinc for this. I went out and bought some earlier this month, but I just couldn't add it to the pile of daily pills ... it takes everything I have to take the pills I need, let alone adding extras that may or may not help me. From what I have read about the hair loss, my impression is that the hair is already dead and is just falling out now as new hair grows in its place. Given that, I am very skeptical that taking supplements would have an impact anyway.
I didn't get sick at all this month! I have been doing really well at sticking to protein, avoiding sugar, getting in my water, chewing carefully, eating slowly, etc. I eat pretty frequently (usually 4 or 5 meals a day), generally an ounce or two of chicken, pork, tuna, edamame (soybeans) or cheese at a time with occasional fruits & vegetables for variety. Bread, potatoes, pasta, and rice leave me with an uncomfortable feeling, so I leave well enough alone and avoid them. My areas of weakness are exercise, which I have only been doing a couple of times a week, and getting in my vitamins & minerals every day. I find myself missing a day here and there on the latter, and I know I have to rein myself in on that to avoid serious issues down the road. Knowing is half the battle -- I am aware of my weak points and can focus on bettering them in the coming month.
That's all I had to write about this month. I hope everyone is doing well regardless of where you all are in this process!
September 1, 2003
Five months out and still losing steadily. I updated the stats table to my current loss ... a total of 82 pounds and 62.75" gone so far! :-)
Unfortunately we are in crisis mode at the moment. We found out on Wednesday that my nephew Nate has cancer. He just turned four in July. He had a malignant orbital tumor removed from behind his eye on Thursday and it appeared that it had infiltrated bone. We are waiting for the results of a CAT scan to find out if it spread before they caught it. In any event, he is having surgery again today to take bone marrow for testing and install a central line into his chest for chemotherapy. Nate is doing well and is in good spirits, but it seems that the tough part of it all will be the next six to twelve months. It is really frustrating that it is the "cure" that will make him so sick. Between trips to the hospital and taking in Nate's 5 year old brother Brad, things have been very hectic this weekend. I am still angry at the universe for letting kids get cancer and pretty sure that I will never have children of my own only to have something like this happen. On the plus side, I have not been using food for comfort despite being an emotional basket case this week. That is a big change from life before surgery.
I had a bunch of stuff I wanted to write about this month, but I can't remember any of it right now. I will write again sometime this month once things have calmed down a bit and I have regained the ability to put two thoughts together.
September 7, 2003
Now that the news of Nate's cancer has sunk in, I am in a little better state of mind. The news is not good -- he has a rare form of adult fibrosarcoma and there is a good chance that even if he survives he will need a heart transplant and reconstructive surgery to his face. However, this is not a support group for that, so I will move on to a relevant topic ...
Having lost 3 more pounds this week, I am SO close to being under 200 pounds (current weight is 201). That reminded me that I have been wanting to list out goals. The list below is what I am able to think of at the moment -- I will add to it as I reach the goals and/or think of others. NOTE: List moved to end of postings.
October 7, 2003
Six months out and all is well. As of this morning, I weigh what I did through most of high school. My body mass index is in the plain old obese category ... no longer severely obese, morbidly obese, or super obese. I have lost 95 pounds and 69.75 inches so far -- that far exceeds where I thought I would be just over six months out from surgery. I thought I would be lucky to lose 100 pounds in the first year, but it looks like I will hit that goal this month. And the inches ... I have lost more in inches than my height. Can't beat that! :-)
My 30th birthday was this past Friday. I decided to buy myself some new pajamas as a treat since mine were all still size 3X and were trying to kill me in my sleep (it is amazing how twisted up one can get in pajamas that are several sizes too large). I went out and bought 3 pairs in a size XL. Later that night, I was all psyched to change into my comfy new jammies ... only they were all way too big!! I was disappointed at having to wait, but thrilled to have finally broken the 'X' barrier in letter sizes :-) I have to admit that I felt a little sad and lost at the store when I went to exchange them. I feel like I don't belong in the normal size department ... like security is going to come out and let me know that someone my size isn't allowed to shop there. Regardless, I did swap them for larges (which are still quite loose) and am down to size 16 in pants and M/L in shirts. It is funny because I look at my clothes as I am putting them on and they look so small compared to the sizes I used to wear that I am convinced that there is no way they are going to fit. Somehow, however, they do.
I still screw up on occasion. My husband and I went to Bertucci's for my birthday dinner and I ate half of a roll. It expanded and I ended up feeling miserable for hours. I know that bread and pasta don't agree with me anymore, but sometimes I step over the line and have to pay the price. Do I miss certain foods? Yes. Do I regret my decision to have surgery? Not at all. Gastric bypass surgery changed my life -- I have energy, I feel better about myself, I am no longer depressed. Without my weight dragging me down physically & emotionally, I am a better person, a better wife, a better friend, a better employee. I still have a long way to go, but my life is already changing in ways that I never anticipated. That is worth much more to me than the ability to eat a roll or have a piece of cake.
October 17, 2003
I made it to the century club! I find it hard to believe that I have lost 100 pounds since I started this journey, but I am thrilled with the results so far. As I approach my lowest adult weight (7 pounds to go), my body is changing in ways I have never seen in myself before. I am feeling bones that I never knew I had ... last night I was lying down and my chin bone was hitting my collarbone, which was rather shocking :-) I find that I am freezing most of the time after losing 100 pounds of insulation. That is a wild shift from the past, as I have always kept a small fan going on my desk at work to battle being hot all the time. Not anymore! I am technically still 76 pounds over my "ideal" weight, but it is anyone's guess where things will level off. I think the next few months will be even more exciting than the last six and a half, simply because I am entering new territory. I can't wait to see what comes next :-)
November 3, 2003
Seven months out and all is well. Today is my second wedding anniversary and my husband has a "new" wife ;-)
I had my first episode of "dumping" on Halloween night. That was super frustrating because I went to great lengths to avoid any and all candy, including the sugar-free kind. To get around the whole trick-or-treater thing, I met my husband at the mall after work for dinner and a movie. We ate at D'Angelo's (a chain of sandwich shops in New England). I had a chicken stir fry d'lite pocket, no sauce, no cheese and only ate some of the chicken and vegetables. Within minutes I started to not feel so great -- I got the awful tired feeling I get after eating sugar. It only got worse from there. I suffered through the movie because going home and facing waves of children in costume banging down the door didn't seem like a great alternative. By the time we got home, I felt like I was going to freeze to death, my abdomen hurt like #@^$*, and I was more nauseous than I have ever been in my life. In a ranking of bad health experiences, this would be number 2 ... with the first few days post-op being number 1 and a root canal being number 3. It took over eight hours for everything to finally clear out. My digestive system still isn't happy when I eat, but it is nothing compared to Friday night. Hopefully that will be the last time I ever go through that.
Aside from dumping, it was a great month. As of today, I am 8 ounces away from my lowest adult weight. I am wearing size 14s and Mediums in most clothes. I wore a dress the other day that has NEVER fit ... I bought it on sale years ago (1998?) when I was at my lowest weight and it was just a smidge too small to wear comfortably. Last week I decided to give it a try and it slid right on. Woohoo! The concept that I can shop for clothes pretty much anywhere boggles my mind after years of being stuck at plus size specialty shops.
I am getting to a point where people whom I haven't seen in a few months don't recognize me. Even people I do see fairly often (people at work, my parents, my siblings) say I look like a totally different person. I am still grappling with that in my own head. I look in the mirror and see the same person as I did six months or a year ago ... I know I fit into much smaller clothes and the scale & tape measure show major progress, but my self-image hasn't caught up. Hopefully it will at some point, because self-loathing is not a good thing. It would also be nice to not worry every morning because my clothes (which look tiny compared to what I was wearing 6 months ago) look too small to fit my body. I panic sometimes that this is all some kind of fabulous illusion that will burst like a soap bubble and leave me back where I started ... or perhaps a dream sequence from which I will suddenly wake up. It is hard to trust that it is real (and permanent) this time.
I met with the surgeon on Friday morning and my weight loss is about 20 pounds ahead of where they expected me to be at 7 months out. I wasn't really sure where I was supposed to be, so that was a relief. Dr. Gazmuri lectured me about not exercising daily, but I knew that was coming. Everything else seems to be fine. Barring any problems with the bloodwork, my next appointment is in January.
February 4, 2004
I am no longer obese! I am down from super morbidly obese to just overweight ... and thrilled to be where I am. I started out at 286 and at 10 months post op have lost 128 pounds, to a current weight of 158. I found a Weight Watchers weigh-in book from when I was 11 years old and I weigh over 20 pounds less now than I did then! I am wearing size 10 to 12 pants and small/medium shirts. I still don't see it in the mirror, but Dr. Gazmuri said this is normal and that it can take up to 2 years for the brain to catch up with the body.
I survived the holidays unscathed. I was really worried about Christmas, which is very focused on food in my family, but it wasn't a problem at all. It didn't bother me nearly as much as I thought it would when everyone else dug into the dessert table. Even better, relatives who hadn't seen me since before surgery didn't even recognize me! My grandmother and aunt asked my sister who the woman in the living room was ... they were shocked when they found out it was just me :-) My mother cried when she saw me dressed up, and it had only been a couple of months since I last saw her. Those are some of the priceless post-op moments I love.
When I am not making people weep, I still struggle with some things. I don't think I will ever really like exercise. I do it several times a week, but only because I have to. I still can't eat bread, rice, potatoes, or other starchy carbs. Thanks to the surgery, my body is very good at communicating when I do things I shouldn't -- like not chew well enough or eat too much or too fast. The latter usually gives me the hiccups, but I also still get that feeling like food is stuck in my chest when I anger my digestive system. It is actually a positive thing because the occasional pain and suffering keeps me in line :-)
I find it difficult to accept the saggy, baggy elephant thing I have going on with excess skin. I knew that it would happen, but I wasn't really prepared for the physical reality of it. After unsuccessfully trying to better the situation with intense exercise and weight training, I am convinced that the extra skin is not going away without reconstructive surgery (at least for me). I haven't decided if I am willing to go through the pain and expense to take care of it. The memory of post-surgical pain from the gastric bypass is fading, but still fresh enough that I shudder to think about going through another surgery. I really can't get another leave from work this soon anyway, so I have until 2005 to think about it.
In general, my life is exponentially better than it was a year ago. I am feeling a little more confident and less self-conscious. I have the energy to work and play. I even signed up for tap dance lessons starting next month! I am amazed at how much a life can change in just 10 months, and hopeful that the trend toward the better will continue as time passes. I can't even begin to express the gratitude I feel toward Dr. Gazmuri, his staff, and the people on this site who share their experiences, stories and support.
April 1, 2004
Hard to believe that a year ago I was in the hospital just coming out of surgery. One year post-op I am sitting here wearing size 6 jeans!!! For all the fuss I made about being able to wear a size without an 'X' in it, I can't complain about the x in six :-)
I have been writing regularly about how much my life has changed for the better, so I won't babble on about that again. I weigh less than 150 (albeit just barely) and I am happy with that. I would like to get to 143 (or less), but there is no profound basis for that ... it would simply mean I was half the person I used to be. I still fall into the "overweight" category by BMI standards -- I would have to get down to 136 to classify as "normal". I'm not sure that is realistic for me, but then again I never thought I would get where I am either.
I am starting to forget that I even had surgery. Maybe forget isn't the right word, since obviously being a post-op is something that changes everything and will impact me every day for the rest of my life. What I mean is that the behavior has become automatic for me -- I steer clear of sugar and disallowed foods without even thinking about it now. Sometimes I see someone else eating a dessert or having a drink and it occurs to me that I would like to do the same, but I would also like to quit my job and spend my time at leisure ... that doesn't mean I am going to do it. I am not bothered by or obsessed with what I gave up to get where I am. I still bear the scars of years of obesity, some physical but mostly emotional. My incision scar, which looked huge to me immediatel
