Kimberly L.

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Well, I made it through surgery and I was able to come home the next day after dinner.  They wanted me to get through three meals without any problems, which I was able to do.  I'm still having a little pain, but I believe it is the drainage tube.  I swear, it feels like it is poking my insides!  Hopefully I will get it removed tomorrow when I go back for my follow up visit.  I see the dietitian first and then the surgeon.  I can't wait!  LOL.  I think I will feel so much more human after that. 

I got to see Peggy in the halls and we chatted, so that was nice.  I've been having trouble keeping up with all the water and protein, but I'm working on it.  I think that will come with some time.  I think I need a different protein than the milk recipe, because it is giving me some stomach problems and also doesn't taste that good!  Today I tried one of the things I got from www.BariatricEating.com, and that was ok.  I may try another one later tonight or sometime tomorrow. 

And as of this morning I am down one pound from the morning of my surgery! LOL.  I'm not worried about that just yet.  I gained while in the hospital, which they said was totally normal, so basically I'm back where I started now.  Maybe by the end of the week I'll be down some. 

Better go for now.  Will write more later.

Kim :0)

I'm now down to just a few days before surgery.  It is starting to not feel very real to me, like it is a dream I'm going to wake up from and I'm having more doubts than I was.  I'm not afraid, really, I just keep thinking I'm going to go crazy from head hunger.  Today for example, my DH made a roast in the crock pot.  It is one of my favorite things to eat, along with the potatos and carrotts and he made crescent rolls too.  I was going all day smelling that cooking and just kept wondering what am I going to do post op when something like that is getting fixed and I know I can't have any.  Will I just get to where the smell is good enough?  Will I eventually be able to eat that, only smaller amounts in the future?  Or will I end up smashing up the carrotts and dribbling the juice over them to try to get some of the flavor.  It is nuts how much I'm worried about what I might never be able to eat again and how upsetting it is getting to me.  Makes me think it would probably be a very good idea to find a shrink around here who could help me deal with some of the food issues.  That is something I will have to seriously think about.  I have been finding myself kind of not thinking about it the last few days - staying away from OH.com and forgetting my spriometer exercises and getting sick of doing them even though I know I need to.  Weird.  Still, I am looking forward to the losing weight part, and have caught myself wondering how much I may weigh at different dates or events that will be coming up this summer.  How much will I weigh at my BIL & SIL's fourth of July picnic; how much at my wedding anniversary; how much at my DD's 4th birthday, etc.  Part of me is very ready, but part of me just isn't... Not ready to start exercising, not ready to eat out of those tiny little cups DH bought for me, etc.  I know it will be OK, but am just getting more nervous I guess.  My Mom & Dad will be coming down on Wednesday and my house is a mess, so I will have to be cleaning a bunch the next couple of days.  I should've been cleaning today all day, but just didn't feel like it at all.  The cold is a bit better, but not gone alltogether just yet.  Have a horrible headache right now though, and I need to go do the spirometer thing I guess.  Will post more later.
Kim :0)

Well, I'm down to less than two weeks to go.  This week I started taking my antidepressants that my surgeon offers anyone who isn't already on them.  I also started using my incentive spirometer.  That thing is so much harder than it looks like it would be!  We went to visit my brother-in-law and sister-in-law, but I still didn't tell my SIL about the surgery.  I really thought I would, since she has had it, but it honestly just never seemed like the right moment to blurt out "hey guess what?!" or anything.  I'm sure I am overly weird about telling people about this.  Yesterday (saturday) I worked all day with my good friend LaRhonda.  She is my closest friend at work.  At the end of the day I finally just told her.  She was sweet.  She hugged me and offered to pray for me and asked me lots of questions and told me how jealous she is because she wants to do it too (way too skinny - silly thing thinks she's big but isn't at all - very beautiful girl.)  It may end up all over my office but oh well.  I don't mean I think she will tell people, but I've felt like if I tell anyone at all I may as well just make an announcement in staff meeting or something.  It is OK if that happens.  I will probably tell my other friend Linda too, because we all talk and it would just be easier that way.  I talked to my OH friend Leisha who had her surgery on Monday & she seems to be doing well and was happy to tell me what to expect, so that was very nice.  I'm just looking forward to it now and am ready for the actual surgery bit to be over.  Will probably spend the next couple of weeks trying to catch a bunch of stuff up at work before I go on leave and trying to get all my last meals in!  Kidding!  OK, maybe not.  Must be time to go to bed!  I'm in the basement and my DH is playing Gears of War on XBox, and my three year old is watching, which is not good.  It's always a shock to the system to hear your sweet three year old little girl say, "Sh*t, yeah!" just like the soldier dudes in the game.  Better get her upstairs...

Kim :0)

Don't really have anything to say today, so I guess I'm just journalling and taking up space.  That's OK.  We went to my pre-op class this past week.  It went fine.  Sometimes I feel like people are starting at me for being the skinniest one in the room at these things, which is such a novel experience.  And the nurse kept trying to hand all my stuff to Dennis, which we laughed about.  But nobody has ever said I'm too skinny for the surgery or anything, and they took my "before" picture that day and I looked like a flipping cow.  Also, I was starving in there and the only thing I had to eat with me was a bag of M&M's that were stashed in my bag.  So here we were, snickering at ourselves while sneaking M&M's in the back of the class full of people about to get weight loss surgery.  It's a wonder they didn't kick us out!!  But I skipped breakfast and was starved!! That's my excuse anyway.  And I was careful not to let anyone else see it.  And we did try to eat a healthy lunch in the cafeteria, so there was that at least.  Still, I felt bad, bad, bad.  :0)  Can't say as I learned a lot more than what I'd already learned for myself though.  I did ask the dreaded birth control question.  The nurse said I can keep taking my birth control pills and no need to switch to a different method or add an extra one or anything.  Of course I'd hate to do that and assume all was well, only to get accidentally pregnant, so might use a little extra precautions just in case.  I think coordinating all the vitamins and supplements might be a bit daunting at first, but I suppose it will get easier with time.  I also got my sample package from www.bariatriceating.com.  That was just like Christmas!  It had a pretty package with pretty paper inside and a ton of different things to try out.  I even got a shaker cup to mix the shakes in, a little rubber bracelet, and a sugar free sucker!  I haven't tried anything out yet... can't decide if I should start trying them all now to see what I like, or if I should just wait till after surgery, since everyone says my taste will change.  The book they gave me in the class had a recipe for a protein supplement they want us to use if we can. It is just milk mixed with powdered milk basically.  You can blend it with ice to make it like a shake, and you can add sugar free flavored stuff to it as well.  I may order some of those DaVinci syrups to try in there.  I got one in my package.  I think it is caramel, which I don't like much, but it might be good in a shake maybe.  Might try to find some sugar free chocolate syrup or powder to try to put in.  I did find the chewable lactaid stuff so hopefully won't have too much trouble with the shake.  She said I could use the Lactaid or Soy milk instead, but not as much protein that way, and I would have to add egg powder??  Something like that.  Would probably rather try to add a flavorless protein powder instead.  I guess that is it for now.  Just 4 weeks to go!!

Kim :0)

Nothing really to report today, but I have exactly one month till my surgery date!  So that's exciting I guess.  I went to another support group meeting last night.  I'm starting to get to know some of the people there a little bit.  Everyone seems so nice! 

I ordered the big sample pack from www.bariatriceating.com.  It is supposed to be here on Friday I think.  Hopefully I can find something in there I can tolerate. 

And tomorrow is my dietitan class.  I have to get up and the flipping crack of dawn to be there on time.  Dennis is going to take the girls off to school and then drive up separately and meet me there.  There's no way for us to take them first and still get there on time, as Reilly can't be dropped off before 7:30.  I think I'm supposed to be there by 8:15 at the latest, and it's an hour away when it's NOT rush hour.  So I figure I'm going to need to leave by 6 or so, maybe earlier.  I am SO not a morning person.  I do wish we could drive up together though.  But oh well.  No way for that to happen.  I'm just glad he's going with me at all.

I'll write more after the class tomorrow.

Kim :0)

So lets see... lots has been going on this week I guess.  I got the offical date finalized and got my dietitian class scheduled and my pre-op testing is scheduled.  Seems like everything is speeding along now.  Yesterday I made out a leave slip and asked for a week of sick leave and the second week of annual leave.  I didn't specify on the slip itself that it was for surgery as I wasn't really sure I wanted the lady that does payroll knowing anything.  I put on a sticky note to my boss that said something like, "Jim - leave request is for surgery.  Please keep confidential.  :0)  I am told two weeks is fairly reasonable if there are no unforseen complications.  If I am feeling up to it I may return sooner.  If I require any additional time, I will call and discuss.  My leave will be used by then so I will be looking at leave without pay or advanced sick leave.  Will try to avoid any of that!  Thanks so much.  Kim :0)"  I didn't get a chance all day to get it to him as he was in meetings all day.  But at the end of the day it was just me & him left and he had stepped out of his office for a minute, so I ducked in and put it on his desk.  We chatted for a bit, and I mentioned to him I had put a leave slip on his desk, but I wasn't positive he heard me.  I left for the day after that.

Then this morning I came into work and he came over to put some lists on my desk and we said good morning but nothing else.  I then got all paranoid that he didn't get my leave slip and it had blown off his desk or something!  But a little while later he came & got me and took me to a private interview room and wanted to be sure I was OK.  He said I of course didn't have to tell him anything, but that he was concerned about me and wanted to know if everything was OK.  I just went ahead and told him.  I explained why I was doing it, and talked about all the health problems I'd started developing this last year.  I asked him if the timing was OK regarding work and if there was anything in particular he wanted me to try to concentrate on before going on leave.  He asked me about the procedure and if it was dangerous so I told him a bit about that stuff.  He wanted to know where I was having it done and how long I would have to be in the hospital and stuff like that.  He was very supportive and not at all annoyed about me taking off work or anything at all like that.  I didn't think he would be, but I wasn't at all sure I was going to tell him what I was doing.  I feel a lot better for having done it, and it made me think maybe I should just be open about it.  I did tell him that I may decide tomorrow to tell everyone so not to be surprised if I changed my mind.  He said he would keep it just between us until and unless he heard differently from me. 

And then tonight my mom called so I went ahead and told her my insurance had approved me and it was a go and when.  I know she'd been praying like crazy I'd get denied or decide not to do it or something.  She says she was praying I would lose the weight on my own.  That just ain't gonna happen though!!  :0)  She seems OK, but I know she is worried.  I wish I could help her not to worry so much.  She did ask me some questions.  She wanted to know about hair loss and lose skin.  Same things I'm worried about !! LOL.  Actually today after support group meeting last night I'm more worried about stinky farts at work!  I don't want to be in my cube surrounded by coworkers or in an interview with a client and have a big ol loud fart rip out!  OMG!!  I'd die of embarrassment!  Guess we'll find out.  I just hope if that is a problem for me I can at least have time to jump up and run to the bathroom!

That's enough for one night!  My hands and arms are starting to ache from all the typing.

Kim :0)

Copying this from a post on the boards so I remember it later.  Some of these sound like yummy no-bake cookies!!

PROTEIN BALLS I
1 cup Peanut Butter
1 cup rolled oatmeal -- not the instant stuff
1 cup protein powder
5 packets Sugar substitute

Warm the peanut butter in microwave about 30-40 seconds -- it melts it and makes mixing in the other ingredients much easier. Add the oatmeal, protein powder, and Sugar substitute and mix well. (If needed, you can add a little bit of water to make it easier to mix) Roll into walnut sized balls, refrigerate. Store in fridge in zip-lock baggies. This recipe makes 20-24 balls.

Protein Balls II
1 cup of protein powder (chocolate or vanilla)
1 cup of non-fat dry milk
1 cup of rice crispy cereal
1 cup of peanut butter
Sugar substitute to taste
Cocoa powder mixed with Sugar substitute

 

Add the Protein Powder, Dry Milk, Cereal and Peanut Butter in a mixing bowl. Mix thoroughly making sure that all the dry milk is in the mix and not really visible. If you like it really sweet, add some more Sugar substitute to fit your taste. Form the mixture into small balls (about 1.5 inches in diameter) Roll in the cocoa/Sugar substitute mix. Refrigerate.

 

PROTEIN BALLS III
1 cup peanut butter
1 cup sugar free honey
1 cup unflavored protein powder
1/2 cup grape nut cereal
sprinkle of cinnamon
sprinkle of Sugar substitute

 

Mix peanut butter, honey and protein powder together till well blended. Form into balls. In another bowl mix grape nuts, Sugar substitute and cinnamon together. Wet peanut butter balls with water and roll into grape nut mixture. Place in frig and grab when you need a yummy snack!

 

PROTEIN BALLS IV
1 cup peanut butter
2 scoops of chocolate protein powder
1/2 cup low carb special K cereal
3 tablespoon of sugar free maple syrup
1/4 cup chopped nuts
oatmeal (not instant)
3 packets of sugar substitute

 

I mixed everything up in a bowl and then rolled them in oatmeal.

 

PROTEIN BALLS V
1 cup protein powder
1 cup peanut butter
1/2 cup sugar free maple syrup or honey

 

Mix together well and roll into balls - about the size of a ping pong ball. Store in a Tupperware or Ziploc bag in the refrigerator..

 

PROTEIN BALLS VI
1 cup protein powder (chocolate or vanilla)
1 cup non-fat dry milk
1 cup rice crispy cereal
1 cup peanut butter
Sugar substitute to taste
cocoa powder mixed with Sugar substitute

 

Add the protein powder, dry milk, cereal and peanut butter in a mixing bowl. Mix thoroughly making sure that all the dry milk is in the mix and not visible. If you like it real sweet, add some more Sugar substitute to fit your taste. Form the mixture into small balls ( about 1.5 inches in diameter) Roll in the cocoa/Sugar substitute mix. Refrigerate. Each ball has about 10 grams of protein.

 

 

 

PROTEIN BALLS VII

 

1 cup Special K Cereal
1 cup of oats
1 cup of peanut butter
1 cup of protein powder (I used chocolate)
1/2 cup sf syrup or honey
mix and roll into walnut size balls
I added craisins last time

 

This last one is the one I made. I doubled the recipe and put it in the bottom of a 9x13 pan,  refridgerated and then cut into bars. Everyone loved them in my preop class!  

Here is a bookmark I have for the pb diet...
http://obesityhelp.com/forums/amos/action,replies/board_
id,4856/topic_id,3120648/cat_id,4456/a,messageboard/

 

OMG, I just got a voice mail from Heather at Dr. Jones' office saying she got my approval letter from my insurance and wanting to tentatively schedule a surgery date of 5/11/07.  I am freaking out a bit.  I was to call back and leave her a voice mail to say if that date worked for me or not, and then she will call back again to schedule all the other stuff I need to do.  I still don't have any idea what my out of pocket will end up being.  I should probably figure that out before scheduling anything, I guess.  I called back and said that date was fine.  I'm so nervous and excited now.  I have to really decide that this is what I want and no backing out now!!  I feel like vomiting a bit.  :0)  Anyway, will write back after I hear back from her again.

Kim :0)

I am so sick of being fat.  Tonight when picking up my daughter from daycare I slipped and fell on the wet tile and broke my left elbow.  The extra bad part is I did this exact same thing to my right elbow back in September or October and that one still hurts!  I've managed to go my whole life without breaking any bones and then during my 2nd pregnancy after getting really big I fell and broke my tailbone.  Then right after she was born I fell on the stairs and re-broke my tailbone.  This was in 2003.  Then this fall I broke the right elbow and now my left!  The ER doc said the type of fracture I got was fairly common if you fall and try to catch yourself with your arm outstretched.  I feel like it is trying to catch all that extra weight is what is causing my fractures.  This sucks.  I'm having to hunt and peck with only one hand! 

I got my return receipt from the insurance packet yesterday, so I gave the insurance people a call today.  They said they received my packet on 3/19/07 and it typically takes about 30 days to reveiw... so now I'm waiting.  :0)

Kim :0)