Kisha D.
Well as some of you know I have been hoping to have the RNY for a good while now. I posted a message last week that God had sent me an angel that was going to loan me the cash to pay for my surgery. Well a few days ago I learned that it was not only one angel but he had in fact sent three, a mother and her two kids. I have always been close to all of them and I love them dearly. I never imagined in a million years that anyone loved me enough to give me such a special blessing. I was overweight as a child, but as I got older in my early teens lost 80 pds or so and was weighing in at 110 pounds. I have to say that was the happiest time of my life. I actually had a life and was able to do all the things other kids could do. Well as time went on I got married and in no time had gained a substantial amount of weight. I would go on diets and lose weight only to gain it back plus some. I began to have medical issues when I was 18 yrs old. It started with high blood pressure and diabetes. My parents paid several thousand dollars trying to get me help for weight loss. You name it I tried it. I lost my father and brother in law in a car accident when I was 20. With that being said I am sure you know what came next...your right DEPRESSION. I was miserable already hated living and now my best friend was gone forever. I began to eat more and more as food was my comfort; my best friend. Later on came the irregular menstrual cycles and polycystic ovarian syndrome. Every doctor I went to said all your medical conditions are weight contributed....ok so lose weight and this will all go away? I got so sick of hearing its your weight till I wanted to puke. I think I had a ear infection one time and they said well you know if you would lose some weight you wouldn't get ear infections....lol..... I was then told I was insulin resistant. Just great>>>> now its gonna be even harder to lose the weight. By the time I was 25 I was bigger than ever. I really hated my life and everything about it. I didn't even consider I was living I was only walking around breathing. I hated getting dressed, never wanted to go out of the house. When I would look in the mirror I didn't know the woman looking back at me. I just knew that I hated what I saw, and nothing was normal or happy about looking at that woman. I could hear her begging for help and screaming let me outta here, I don't belong in here. Where am I????? Please I want out of here repeating the same thing over and over in my head on a daily basis. I went through a divorce right after I turned 24 and was single for 5 yrs. I lost a little weight at this time but not enough to mention. The going out got old quick and I found I was spending lots more time with my best friend again....yep it was FOOD >>>> This went on for a few years and all my medical issues were only getting worse nothing was getting better. I met my wonderful husband and married him 2 days after I turned 29. He tries his hardest to help me and encourage me that I can have a better life once I am healthy. I have depended solely on him for quiet some time now. I must say he has been understanding about my health conditions and supports my decision to have the surgery. When I was 30 I was told I had sleep apnea and was put on a c pap machine. I also was diagnosed with fibromyalgia which is constant pain in several different areas. The swelling was terrible and the pain was also. No one could understand how I was hurting so bad or so it seemed. You are just lazy you don't want to do anything was the response from a select few. This was not true at all. Could they all not see I was dying on the inside and now the outside as well. My life was slowly coming to an end. I could not work anymore and my duties as a housewife were very limited. I was miserable, tired of hurting physically and emotionally. So now I am 32 and on several different medications with the majority causing weight gain. I have been unable to lose the weight on my own for 17 yrs or more except for the one time but then I still gained it all back and more... so what will I do now ? The truth is I knew what I was going to do; I was going to die if I didn't find a way to do have this surgery. It was such a shock to me the day my angels came with the great news. When the daughter offered I was speechless for a minute, but then said you are kidding me, you would really do that for me? Yes she said. You are going to have this surgery Kisha we love you and we want to help you get your life back. We need you to be here with us and healthy. I couldn't hold back the tears of joy that streamed down my face as I looked up at her and saw that she was crying right along with me. Its all going to be ok Kish as she sometimes calls me. Don't you worry about nothing. The mother walks in and says you know we have been talking about this for some time and I just think its the right thing to do. There is three of us and we can chip in and do it together. God has been good and we have been greatly blessed. So we all sit and talked about everything and the daughter says I am gonna ask brother to help to. She did just that without wasting a day he was asked within 24 hrs and responds how much does she need? The sister responding back with the amount and he says yes just let me know if there is anything else she needs. I am so blessed. Thank you Jesus and thank you for this wonderful family that I have had the pleasure of being a part of their life and them of mine. Their mother as she has always supported me and encouraged me throughout my battle with obesity as well as other problems that I have faced in my life. I will never forget the kindness this family has shown to me and what they have meant to me in my life. The support that has came from their mother for so many years now means more than she will ever know. They have all blessed me in so many ways to be able to live a normal, healthy and happy life. Words could never express what their love and kindness has meant , not just this time but so many times through out the years. My new life is being made possible, my dream is about to come true only because the three of them cared enough to stop, look at what was happening to me, listen to that silent voice coming from within me to please give me my life back, to let me find the true person I knew I had hid inside of me dying to come out. They are loved and cared for deeply. What SPECIAL people they truly are! Amen
