Journeys begin with the first step and all that crap :-)

Oct 07, 2012

I took that first step a year ago and then i sat down and took a nap. Now I am awake and finally started the process again a few weeks ago.  I am so ready to make this change and to feel healthy again.  I am out of breath constantly and sometimes even walking outside with my husband or into the store feels like a horrible effort.  That's so sad to me.  I am 30 years old and I feel 300.  I miss feeling pretty and enjoying fashion and accessories.  I rarely get dressed up anymore and i don't ever feel completely comfortable in my clothes.  I want to make a list of reasons why I want to do this and continue on my weight loss journey.

1. I want to be able to fly on a plane again without having to stuff myself into the seat and get a seat belt extender.
2. I never want to have to worry about fitting into restaurant or concert hall chairs.  I went to an Elton John concert with my husband this spring and I couldn't fit into the ampitheatre chairs.  We stood in the breezeway the entire time and the night was horribly depressing.  I never want to put myself or my husband through that again.
3. I want to ride rollar coasters again.
4. I want to fit in my clothes again. I can't wear about 85% of my clothes. I have so many different sizes in my closet and I have given away so many nice clothes because I just don't think I will ever be able to fit in them again.
5. I want to exercise in the gym again and not feel like everyone is starring at me.
6. I want to stop snoring at night.
7. I want to be comfortable in my body and want to feel sexy again.

There is my preliminary list.  Those are just a few things I look forward to changing. I miss my outgoing and fun life.  I feel somewhat trapped in my body and in my fat.  I am ready for this to be over.  I am ready for a huge life change and it has to be soon.  I am only 30 but my blood pressure is high, my moods and depression are out of control and I am constantly out of breath. I don't want to ruin my body anymore and shorten my life.  I want to change....

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