General Tso was so not worth it

May 20, 2013

Tuesday... blah. Work is really starting to grate on my nerves.  It's in part due to me not really feeling like I totally get what I'm doing and part me just not wanting to do it! LOL Today I am going to get down to business and make sure that I am getting everything done that I need to do today. No more procrastinating. When I sign off of work at 5:30, I want to feel like I did everything I needed to do today instead of it all just waiting for me tomorrow.

I also feel this way about my weight loss... NO procrastinating.  Before the surgery, I would be on a diet and lose weight and feel like I needed to give myself a break because I had been on plan for so long. I can't let that attitude back into my mindset.  I need to make sure that I'm not letting myself think like that. I struggled some yesterday and had fleeting thoughts of just going ahead and eating pizza because I wasn't really doing that great today anyway... and also I deserved a cheat day! Ugh... WRONG!

Yesterday was a test.  I woke up after a great week of weight loss and felt ready to go.  I had coffee and cottage cheese and ham for breakfast. Then around 12 or so, work started getting on my nerves and I started having crazy cravings for carbs. Like, out of no where! I checked my calendar and I am PMSing.  So I knew why I was all of the sudden so irritable and cranky.  At lunch, I go in the kitchen to make something and nothing looks good! I hate everything. I grabbed a piece of that stupid General Tso chicken that has been in the fridge forever and ate it! Gross.... I then threw the rest out so I couldn't eat anymore. But did that stop me? Nope, I went and ate 6 cheetos. WTH!?!? I stopped myself pretty quickly and grabbed some water and got out of the kitchen.  I spent the rest of my lunch in my bedroom then grabbed this leftover zucchini pizza thing I made Sunday night and ate that for my real lunch. It didn't have nearly enough protein but that's all I wanted.

I then ate veggie chips and salsa when I got off work because I was seriously craving salt and carbs.  The veggie chips aren't that bad, 11 carbs for the whole bag because I got the individual portion bags from Costco.  I can only have that kinda stuff if they are in small bags.  I didn't even eat the whole bag but still... not any protein in those.

I did go to yoga last night and that felt good. Jason left me a rose in my car when I was at the gym and that made me feel really good. My cravings were a little easier to manage after that.  I got home and ate a piece of cheese, some shrimp and cucumbers.  I still wasn't anywhere near where I needed to be with protein so I also drank a protein shake. That put me at 71 grams of protein which is pretty good but it sent me over my calorie goal for the day.  I weighed this morning and was up like .4 lbs so not too bad.

Today I am committing to very low carb and super high protein.  Protein shake and maybe some turkey sausage for breakfast. Chicken sausage and shrimp for lunch. Snacks will be deli meat and cheese. No veggie chips! I need to limit those to like twice a week. Not sure what is for dinner tonight but you can bet it will be meat and veggies. I have two days before I go see my PCP who hasn't seen me since December, before my surgery.  I can't wait to hop up on that scale this time! I think I weighed in at 356 last time... now I will be at least 80 pounds lighter. What a great feeling! I just need to keep focused on my water, my protein and my weight loss. Can't let those naughty thoughts creep in!

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