I can admit it.. i'm not where i should be

Apr 14, 2011

Sooo.. today was my official 7 week weigh in and while i got on the scale 2 days ago and it said i was 223.3 i got on today and i'm up to 224.0. At first i was a little taken aback at the increase on the scale... i mean i don't weigh myself daily so i never really see the day to day fluctuations on the scale and i have to admit i'm now glad i don't!
I'm not feeling like i got jipped on the scale or anything either so i had to think about why that was. And if i'm honest, which i've promised myself i would be i've been towing the line ALOT since surgery and i really need to get myself back on track. Here are my confessions:

1. I've picked up smoking again.. i know how dangerous it is, especially for me after WLS and considering I have asthma, but i just haven't been able to walk away from it. i told myself it was going to be my only vice now that i've had surgery. Well i obviously lied to myself there as well because this isn't my only confession. Truth is i've been testing the waters waaay too much after being only 6-7 weeks out of surgery.
2. I'm eating whatever i want, when i want. While i'm hyper aware of what calories/ sugars/ fats I'm consuming at any given time i'm not journaling my food so i don't have a picture of what the day looked like. And while i think i have a great memory when it comes to details my mind is truly like a sieve and i can't even remember how many grams of protein i've consumed for the day! Not good. Not to mention, i'm not supposed to have sweets at all and i've bitten into chocolate cake,  a cupcake, strawberry ice cream, and little dark chocolate morsels. Why you ask, mostly to see if i could.. again testing the waters. I've also gotten myself to the point where i can have bread too. My Dr's don't recommend this until you're 6 months out, but here i am.. eating it.  Don't get me wrong, i'm happy that i can have a taste of things i like and that i'm tolerating just about everything quite well, but if i'm not journaling then i don't have a true picture of ANYTHING, not what i'm missing in my diet or where i am in regards to calories. This has got to change right now!
3. I'm not taking ALL of my vitamins either. i'm taking my multi and b12 the way i should but  i'm taking calcium like 1x / day instead of 3 and i haven't been taking my iron at all. I've just got to make time to do this. That is all.

While i'm struggling in those areas i can say positively that i've started working out. I'm doing Zumba and i like it so far. I do want to incorporate more walking and should invest in a bodybugg or something to track my burn. I know that i've entered a new lifestyle and i'm so happy with my journey thus far but if i truly want to see the results i'm seeking i need to use my pouch in the best possible way and I'm going to start right now. Just b/c i've messed up a bit doesn't mean that i should continue doing so. I struggled with that before and i'm not going to let that be a problem for me going forward.. any suggestions for getting these things on track will be appreciated!

Hope everyone is happy and healthy! Have a great weekend!

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