Lizzie F.
My story is probably the same as many of you out there.
I have ALWAYS been concious of my weight, and I was told I was fat from a very young age. I can't remember a time growing up when I wasn't on a diet. Looking back at photos from my childhood, I can see that I was a bit bigger than other kids my age, but certainly not overweight to the point where dieting was necessary. My younger sister was always rail thin, so that made me look bigger as well.
My mother was overweight as a child, and I think she was so afraid of that happening to her own children, that she pushed dieting on us very early. I certainly don't think that my weight problem is my mother's fault, but she was the first person who made me think I was fat. My grandfather (my mother's father) was also very critical of appearances, and my grandmother as well. Over the years, various people who were important in my life, all told me I was fat, or ridiculed my body. I think then I just believed that I was fat, and that became my identity. The fat girl.
I learned to develop my "personality", since I knew I wouldn't be getting anywhere on my looks. I was very smart and bookish. I tried to make parents proud of me through my school work. I was also a good singer and I played the piano. I'm also known as the "funny one" in my group of friends. Not that it's a bad thing, but it's just how I learned to cope.
I think there are many reasons why I over eat, and I know I'll have to deal with all those reasons once my crutch is taken away.
Somehow, in all this emotional disfunction, I managed to meet the man of my dreams. We have been together for 9 years, married for 5 years, and have 3 of the most beautiful, healthy children in the whole world.
I can't wait to be able to run around the soccer field with them, chase them around the yard, and basically just be active with them. They are are very sweet and compassionate boys who would never say anything to hurt my feelings, but I sometimes wonder if they are ashamed of me, or if their friends make fun of them because of my weight.
My youngest son is only 2 years old, so with any luck, he won't have any memories of Mommy being overweight.
I am so excited about having this surgery!!
