Lindsey W.
In motion...
Jun 12, 2013
2 weeks ago, I had my PCP fax in a clearance for surgery. I expressed the need for things to be rapid since we are on such a crazy schedule with my husband working out of state 2 weeks out of the month. She sent it in on Friday, May 31. On Tuesday, the 4th, I heard from the patient assistant that I could go ahead and start my liquid diet because my consultation was scheduled for that Friday and she found 2 open surgery dates – the 17th and the 19th. I told her the 17th would, ideally, be better for us with my husband only having a week and a half home at that point. She couldn’t technically hold that date since the Dr. still had several more days of seeing patients before my consultation but hopefully it would still be open by Friday. Later, she emailed me saying that she penciled me in for the 17th but shhhh… WOW, how nice?!
So, Wednesday, the 5th, started my liquid diet and so far, so good. Down 4 lbs by day 2 and as of today, Day 7, I have only cheated once and that was 2 nights ago with a loss of 11 lbs so far. As much as I didn't want to admit defeat, I did tell our patient assistant last night via email just to be on the safe side. I got a phone call with a nice 2 minute long voicemail from the nurse manager telling me why it was really important not to let it happen again. She was really sweet but I could understand there was a serious tone in her concern for my safety, i.e. my liver not getting cut or "broken" from what I've read. I'm doing much better and 1 day closer to Monday.
Wow. Monday. It'll be here before I know it. I have to say my mind is going 90 to nothing....just on overdrive thinking about how things WON'T be anymore. For instance, one thing I'm thinking is that my relationship with food will never be the same and it's almost kind of sad in an odd way. As thankful as I am to be having this surgery and changing my life, my mind takes me to food and how it has always been the centerpiece around everything here in the south. Celebration, let's eat. Happy Birthday, let's eat. You got your driver's license, let's eat. You're getting married, let's eat. Literally, everything I'm surrounded by is food. Or maybe I'm feeling that way since I can't have it. Am I the only one thinking like this before surgery? I'm excited but a part of me feels like I'm losing something...besides weight...and that's the relationship I have with food being the center of everything we seem to do around here. How do I bring a change in my lifestyle around friends and family if they aren't making the change? Is it a constant battle against my mind for the rest of my life? I'm 28 so I'm hoping to have alot more left to live. Maybe I need to redirect my thoughts and focus on the positives instead of the negatives. How did any of you cope with these thoughts and what do you do today 1, 2, 3+ years out of surgery?
