mzlaura
What a ride......
Dec 14, 2013
It's been almost 9.5 months since my gastric bypass surgery and YET it still feels like yesterday! So much to say and reflect on. I've had my moments of complete happiness, sadness, confusion, failure, success, you name it i have probably had it. ONE thing i will say here and now is that this journey was much more different than i thought it would be. My stalls have ripped me apart and caused me to think i am a failure. I had some false assumption that i would be down at least 100 lbs by now and i just hit 80lbs today. So i am a slow loser and it will take me longer than most to hit goal.. OK! I didn't think i would be one that would dump and not be able to eat 4 bites of pasta but alas yup i cannot eat carbs anymore.. well i can if i want to pay for it by vomiting and severe stomach pain. NO THANKS!!! I didn't think i would develop a herniated disc in my back at 3 months post-op but I DID! I didn't think i would develop gastritis at 1 month post-op BUT I DID. I didn't think i would develop a ulcer at 7 months post-op BUT I DID. I am still dealing with severe constipation. Soo much to deal with at 29 years old. I am on over 20 medications a day for pain, etc.. Now before hearing my horror stories and deciding not to do the RNY ask yourself this...... IS IT WORTH IT? Are you in a much worse place now?? Are you able to handle the roller coaster of a ride approaching and potential side effects? Don't think for a second that it can't happen to you because it certainly can. The crazy thing is yes i have had 2nd thoughts through this journey and even regretted it at times but i would still do it all over again... crazy right?? NOPE not to me.
I want pre-op people to be aware of things that may and can happen don't think for a moment your an exception to the rule because you are not. As you can see above i have gone through a lot through my journey and i will deal with my surgery the rest of my life and still battle my demons FOOD, DEPRESSION, ETC. That will never go away. Even with me losing 185 lbs almost i still deal with these issues. I love my new body i went from a high weight in 4/2011 of 401 lbs to currently 216 lbs. I still see myself as a fat girl though.. when i look in the mirror i still have a hard time seeing how much i changed. I still tug on my fat i have left and hate it. I have lots of hanging skin that i will likely never be able to get rid of because of not being able to afford it. That's realistic though expect it! I would still do this all over again though despite everything.. my ulcer will eventually heal and my back hopefully will get better. I think it's important to know the great, the real, the bad, and the WOW.. to this surgery. It's not a game, you live with this decision the rest of your LIFE. Make the right one for you. Some people breeze through without 1 issue great for them. It's funny how some days you can feel collar bones and your face looks way to small and you think i am too bony... then you see your belly and think i am still too fat.... I DO IT ALL THE TIME! The surgery does work but you have to do your part too it's legit real not people just trying to make up stories. You will gain your weight back and stall even more if you don't follow the rules. You have to take vitamins the rest of your life another REAL STORY. I was one of the people who was so excited for my surgery that i thought i knew EVERYTHING haha think again... anything you learn on paper DOES NOT prepare you for the real deal. I will continue to lose SLOW but i just have to learn to be okay with that. It's what my body wants to do. Hope someone can read my blog and at least learn something or understand more coming from a person who has had this surgery. Goodluck to all you pre-ops and do know i DO NOT REGRET THIS ONE BIT. I just thought it would important for you all to see what i have to say 100% real.
