How do you spell HOPE?

Nov 11, 2008

For probably the last 22 years my health has been in the toilet.  First there was the back problem and the horrendous complications in 1986 from a very simple out-patient procedure to which I had to have numerous surgeries and procedures to resolve that.  (My life remained sedentary as a result of unresolved back issues and the pounds added.)  Then there was the courageous attempt on my part to resolve the back pain in 93 with the surgery to remove the corrupted discs.  More sedentary lifestyle, more packed on pounds.  In 2000, I had surgery in my neck and both hands to remedy the challenges of living in this messed up body.  More sedentary lifestyle, more packed on pounds.  Throughout it all, I have had multiple hospitalizations to treat an uncontrolled asthmatic condition.  One of the major forms of treatment for each of these conditions is steroids and guess what steroids are known for--packing on pounds.  It would be unfair to place blame totally on my health or lack of especially in light of the fact that I live in South Louisiana where food is a celebration, a medication and a hobby.  Today I am carrying around what amounts to another person in the form of poundage and believe me, it is no easy chore.  The past few years have caused me to enter into depression as a result of pain, fatigue (and hopelessness).  And so there you have the picture of my existence until a couple of weeks ago when I met a lady in my community.  We hit it off instantly and I soon learned that she had recently lost nearly 100 pounds as a result of bariatric surgery.  My interest peaked and I turned it into a prayer.  "God, if this is for me, then open doors, if not, then close each door along the way."  And the rest is almost history.  I discussed it with my family and my pastor and we prayed because God had to make a way for the finances since my insurance would not cover $14,000.00surgery they say is elective.  In this day and economy with investments taking a dive, what better time to use some of that (retirement) money to invest into MY future. From the scheduling of appointments and tests, to finding parking places, this has been smooth sailing.  Today I am scheduled for my final apt--a psychiatric exam before I report for my surgery on Monday.  I'm a little anxious about the psychiatric visit and hope that the doctor doesn't recognize that I have been mascarading as a normal person all this time!  (smiling).  Anyway, if you are reading this, I spell HOPE as this chapter I am in right now.  Hope that maybe I can get moving again.  Hope that the next astma attack doesn't do me in.  Hope that I can walk, even run again. 
Hope--an Amazing Virtue!
Thank you God!

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