Nannyre2U

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†  Beauty for Ashes Volume 3 is what my latest Journal's Title reads.  Volume 1 contained all of my pre-op stuff--questions, apts., thoughts, studies, notes, etc.  There were the before pix and the after pics.  Whenever my magazines and newsletters came in, I'd study them and insert any note worthy lessons inside it.  It was filled to the six month mark with the miracles that happened during the first  days and weeks  of my recovery from a lifetime of obesity.  Beauty For Ashes Volume 2 was the beginning of yet a new chapter when I decided to jumpstart a stall in weightloss and diary my food and liquid intake along with activity for a period of time.  It too contained apts., pictures, thoughts and the likes.  In the inside cover of that journal, I posted my Louisiana Handicap I.D. card, since I no longer consider my self  handicapped.  Other pictures and cards and notes were included as well.  Somewhere mid summer, my journal came up missing and I was distraught.  I could only commit my feelings to God but my fear was that someone other than me would find my journal.  My journals have always been MY journals.  I have never given thought that someone other than myself would have access to them and the thought of it falling into the wrong hands troubled me alot.  Nonetheless, I began Volume three on the day that Paul went to have his surgery.  I knew I needed to continue dialouging and during such a crucial time too!  So first stop before surgery center was to Books a Million to find just the right one.  I have been writing my thoughts for a life time.  I find it to be much cheaper than a therapist and more beneficial too. (Let me interject that I gratefully located Volume 2, trapped beneath the springs of my recliner--mangled and broken--but recovered just the same!) I am currently half-way thru Volume 3 of Beauty for Ashes and this volume contains information about my thoughts one year out.  It has greeting cards from people congratulating me, some that I didn't know much more than a year ago.  It has pictures of the new me that I'm learning to love as well of pictures of the old me that I hardly recognize.  On the anniversary of my surgery, I sat down and looked through my first two journals and marveled at the journey I've been on.  I can honestly say that I am a living breathing miracle.  Without wls, I do not think I would be here today. Looking back over the year I want to shout to the world--NEVER,NEVER, NEVER, GIVE UP!  It's my motto, my creed!

You gotta dance like noone's watching!
Current mood:  loved
Category: Life

I've got one of those cute little debit cards that come from a dept store that you can load money onto.  This one was designed for fathers day last year.   It's on my calendar on my desk to serve as a reminder to me of who my dance partner is.  It's a close up snap shot of  two pair of legs, one in suit with polished black shoes.  The other is a child's bare feet planted securely on top of those nicely polished shoes.  Each morning as I report for work, I sit at my desk and see what my day holds and catch a glimpse of the dance.  I don't have to go through this life danceless.  I don't even have to go a day without my dance.  If I listen real intently, I can hear the faint tune of the song my Father is humming in my ear, as he holds out his hand and invites me to dance...