newyearnewme2015
Hello, my name is Tanicka. I am 44 years old. I work a full time job I spent most of my life caring for, my ex-husband, children, aging parents and grandparents, and other misc. family and stressful situations. I am the type of person that is loyal and will always be there. If you need me, I am there no matter what. More times than I should have, I have sacrificed my needs for the needs of others.
Being a giving person has been a blessing and a curse. It is a blessing because I feel wonderful helping others. There is no greater joy. However it’s a curse because I used so much time caring for others, I wasn't taking care of my needs. I lost myself for a long time while taking care of others. I felt as if I was in a dark room and couldn't find the switch to cut on the light. The saddest part is that some of those I cared for didn't truly care for me back. Some really devastated my self-esteem and self-image.
I have decided to do something for me. I cut away a large amount of negativity in my life and cut a number of negative nellie's out as well. Now I would like to tackle my next personal goal. MY WEIGHT!!!
I have been overweight or severely overweight for most of my life, I was always the biggest girl in my class. I can’t remember a time, (since high school) when I weighed less than 200lbs. My current weight is 238lbs, and I stand only 5’5 flat footed (my BMI is 38 or 39 which is obese). I am actually down in weight from a total weight of 246lbs, my highest weight ever.
I have always felt that I was a small person trapped in a large body. Even in junior high and high school, even as a bigger kid, I took ballet, jazz and modern dance classes, and gymnastics. I was highly energetic and performed many physical activates. I was even a cheerleader (biggest on the squad, but I had spirit, yes I did!!!) and could out cheer, high kick, split and tumble even some of the smallest girls on the squad.
I have been having pain in my back and knees for years and made every excuse for the pain except for my weight. Self-fake outs such as, “oh I must have slept funny, and that’s why my back hurts.” Or "Oh it must be about to rain because my knees are killing me." I also have breathing and sleeping issues due to my weight. And I recently found out that I am prehypertension. Not to mention the long family history of thyroid disorders, hypertension, Type 2 diabetes, and heart disease that runs in both sides of my family. My family is riddled with every disease or disorder that plagues African Americans. Most of these conditions can be triggered by obesity. And the topper of it all battles with depression, which can be a vicious cycle if one of our triggers is your weight. This scares me to my core. Some time ago my doctor advised that the pain in my back and knees would not subside until I lost at least 30-40lbs and maintain that weight loss. it's basically loss the weight or prepare yourself for back braces and knee surgeries on the future. The doctor also had concerns about me being prehypertension and elevated white blood cell counts (many times found in obese people), and other irregularities I am experiencing that can be directly linked to being overweight. My doctor and I would like to see me at a weight closer to my suggested weight. Especially considering my age and sedentary career.
I won’t lie, like most people I have tried every product and diet on the market for weight loss. If you can name it I've more than likely tried it. I had been on the "yo-yo" dieting and tried so many diets that I had lost track. Yes, I have lost weight on some. On my last major weight loss journey, I lost a total of 35lbs and kept it off for almost 2 years. That is until last year. I soon started back with the bad eating habits (eating and snacking while late nights. And very little exercise.). as a result I gained that weight back.
So to complete my I am changing my entire life for the better, because of my desire to have the surgery. I have already began to change up my eating habits, drinking (5-6) 8 oz. cups of water a day. walking the dog every day for at least 15 to 20 minutes.
For me, this surgery is not just to change my weight. It’s another tool I want to use to complete a transformation in my life. I have been a caterpillar to long, I am ready to be a butterfly.
Because my insurance will not cover the cost I have decided to have my surgery abroad. I saved for almost 2 years only to tear my right ACL and had to use my savings to pay my surgical deductible to repair it. I had to start over again. But I am determined to get my surgery and lose the weight.
About Me
Before & After
rollover to see after photo
