Reddheadd7
Let's see...as far as I can remember, going back to elementary school, I've always been chubby. The only person that really said anything about my weight was my grandpa. My grandma and my mom would always say, "that's just baby fat, she'll grow out of it". I had baby fat for a long time! I remember in jr. high I wore size 14 pants even if they were too tight because Mervyns didn't carry anything larger and the only fat person store I knew about was for grandma's.
In high school I -never- wore jeans...in fact I don't think I wore jeans again until my mid to late 20s when Avenue and Lane Bryant became my stores of choice. Always stretch pants, sweats and the like. I weighed 175 my senior year then after slowly started gaining and stayed at about 215 until after I had my first daughter at age 20. I had tried the B12 injection diet, phen fen and nutrisystem but only lost about 15 lbs with each of them, meaning, I'd do one diet, lose weight then gain it back and try another one. In May '94 I was in a car accident with a broken pelvic bone which put me on my back for about 12 wks so once I was up and around again and muscle was coming back, I came in at a svelt 242, my highest weight at that time. That November I married my baby daddy. Probably about In '97 I lost 42 lbs by walking everyday at lunch and maintained for about a year then gained back 30 after I had my second daughter n 2000, lost that 30 lbs just in time for my 10 yr high school reunion. 
I did Weight Watchers with both those losses and maintained for almost 2 yrs then I got a new job. This is where it went really bad. We all ate together, everyday and fast food mostly and slowly reached 249. My mom had her RNY and was pushing me to do it so finally in 2005 I tried attempt #1 for WLS and really just didn't follow through and let it go by the wayside. I think I knew in my heart that my husband would really be affected by this because he was a very jealous type person and well, he is a chubby chaser. After 10 yrs of marriage I got divorced (best decision ever) but fell into a heavy depression, not because of the divorce because I chose to leave him. It was more because of getting out of a terrible marriage that was full of mental abuse and his bad temper plus he was extremely negative and having to live on my own for the first time in my life at 33 years old. I loved it though. I always craved being on my own but it's not easy at first. Probably about a year later I started on Jenny Craig. I lost about 30 lbs and I was working out and saw really good changes in my body from lifting weights. I went through attempt #2 for WLS but at that time my BMI was too low and I had no medical problems so they denied me and JC got too expensive so I quit...and gained....more. 
I thought I had a good grasp on my depression with medication and therapy but then I lost my job on St. Patrick's Day in 2008 and again, depression set in. I slowly gained weight. I didn't work for about 7 months and during this time I met my honey Josh. I started working at a temp job and about 8 months later I weened myself off the medication but that was not a good idea. That went from bad to worstest ever! and I gained even more weight. It was very stressful for me because the temp job ended and I had to move in with my honey. I wasn't really ready for this but I really didn't have a choice because I couldn't support myself and my daughters. When I moved in with him, my daughters lived with their dad because I didn't want to transfer them to new schools with my unstable situation. That was SO hard for me to be without my girls. In the next year I gained weight...Now I'm up to 275ish but I got a new job! I went to my Dr to see about starting attempt #3 for WLS which brings me here and up to date. Although now I'm actually on 2 antidepressants and doing awesome!!!
It really gave me the focus and motivation I needed to go all the way this time and really make it happen.
I'm going through pretty much everything a lot of you have or is going through to get this surgery done. The only thing that I'm having an issue with is the stupid therapist i saw in result of my evaluation but you'll read that blog. 
My honey is really supportive of my decision but I have people that don't want me to have it and I don't talk about the subject to them but I have my family who do support me, especially because my mom and brother both had RNY. I'm actually using the same surgeon as my bro. I'm excited to be on OH and meet a bunch of you that -really- understand me and to get and give that extra support we all need. I'm looking forward to the journey! 
