starbucksiren

Send Message

Block

Add Friend

My surgery was August 9, 2007.  I weighed 270 lbs the day of surgery.  Today is Valentine's Day 2008.  I weighed 124 this morning.  I wanted to weigh 200, or less, but it didn't happen.  Realistically life happens, and even though I wanted it really bad, I havent worked out like I should have been.  But thats my fault, no one else's.  I don't really mind, I know that I am still losing weight.  I haven't gained since the surgery, just lost.  If it goes slower than I initially hoped, I will still be ahead.  I am a size 18/20 right now.  Before surgery I was a size 22/24.  But I have lost alot of inches all over.  If I would just comit to working out in my beautiful full size gym upstairs, I would be in a bikini today.  But I am not an athlete, and I hate working out.  No matter how much gym equipment I purchase, or how much I buy workout clothes or gadgets to make working out fun/entertaining/cute....the bottom line is, I have to get my ass in the gym and work it out.  And if I don't, having the surgery will just be a limitation of how much I can consume at a sitting.  I wont really lose at all.  Just stay fat like I am right now.  I was hoping that the surgery would carry me through at least 60 lbs of lost weight before I had to work out, but thats not realistic for my body.  I still have the binging problems I had before surgery. Now it just means I am throwing it up after eating it, because of the uncomfortable feeling food causes when eaten in excess.  My husband is sympathetic to a point.  He tells me "This is what you paid twelve thousand dollars for".  And he is right.  Even though I was hoping to be skinny as a result of the surgery, the reality is, I paid to simply limit the amount I can eat.  Thats exactly what it does.  If I force the issue, I end of gagging and spitting it up like a fool.  Duh.  I thought it would only happen a few times, but guess what, I am a hard headed girl, and after doing it several dozen times, I am finally getting used to the fact that I can't eat certain foods EVER AGAIN.  Bread, meat, oranges, and pasta.  But oh well.  If you ask me, it's still worth it.  And yes, it is hard, its not easy.  But it will shock your body into doing whats you should have been doing all along....EATING LESS!