TeaginB
I need sleep! NOW.
Oct 13, 2009
The second sleep study was with the CPAP machine and I decided to not do any research in an effort to not sike myself out. I did however decide to bring my own pillow and some ear plugs! So, when I show up I assume they are going to just hook me up to the CPAP machine and send me on to bed. Oh no they had to hook me up to all the strange colored wires again. I swear the tears were in my eyes as I couldnt believe I was going to have to miserable again through the whole night. Guess what though? It went GREAT!!!
That CPAP machine gave me the best night of sleep I have EVER had......honestly. I just could not believe it and the next day I was so refreshed. So it has been a week now with NO CPAP machine and boy do I miss it....lol Just waiting for my PCP to get on the ball and order one for me. I think the CPAP machine and I are gonna be bestest of friends. I cant believe I have gone most of my life not knowing that I wasnt getting a good nights sleep and what was causing it. I guess I just believed everyone who kept telling me "your overweight and your body is just so tierd from the weight you are carrying" or "it must be the bad food you eat ALL DAY". Now I know that those add to sleepyness but that sleep that I achieved with the CPAP was INCREDABLE!! I know say cheers to sleep studies......
Pre-op mumbo jumbo...
Sep 20, 2009
Last week was my first pre-op appointment which consisted of my upper GI and I have one word for it EWWWWW!
So I get undressed and put on the little night gowns they give you (had to use 2 one going around the front one around the back) and then I go into the x-ray room and take the nasty fizzy ewww stuff. Then I was advised not to burb....torture because it was the only thing I felt like doing after I took it! 
Then came the stuff that I was told before drinking "just tastes like water"?!?! I take the first big gulp and literally almost spit it back out.....lol Thankfully I made it through and I guess in the end I am thankful I went in there knowing nothing about it--otherwise I probably would have run away! 
Most embarrassing thing though was when I went back to my car and looked in the rearview mirror--yea, I had white stuff dried up all over my mouth.....that would be the wonderful drink I had during the x-ray. Geez and no one said ANYTHING. lol this is so my luck. hahahahahahahaha 
Next week is the sleep study and I am hoping all goes well just a little nervous about someone "watching" me sleep.....WIERD! The ball is officailly rolling and it really makes me feel on top of the world. For once in my life I am taking control and following through with my dream!
Really it's not that bad!
Sep 16, 2009
. My hunger is locked away safely with healthy choices! So here goes my daily eating agenda:
B: Muscle Milk protein shake (have to add a 1/2 cup of milk because other wise it is thick and I cant seem to get it down with out wanting to hurl....lol)
S: half a banana
L: Muscle Milk protein shake (oh yea incase you were wondering THAT-IS-IT. I get two protein shakes a day and one small meal.)
S: 1/2 cup unsweetened applesauce
D: Groud turkey with cut up onion mixed in, salt and pepper for taste, and then made into a patty and cooked in a skillet! It was so delicious especially when I added a nice salad with some yummy bellpepper and cucumbers! Mmmmmmm mmmmm good!
I also got a walk in tonight with my husband and it felt sooooooooo good! I feel complete and I am NOT hungry. Could it be that my mind is actually deciding to work with my body? If so-----it is about freaking time!
So its not just me?
Sep 11, 2009
So I am not the only one who through weight GAIN has lost their true identity? lol 
Because I am obese I find myself constantly uncomfortable--hot, irritated, hungry, tired, impatient....etc. Oh and my poor husband definitely gets the short end of the stick and I have become REALLY good at appologizing! 
As soon as I "fly off the handle" I immedialty break into tears and say OMG did I just really have a fit over that?!?! This is what I would call my "fat speaking for me"!
There are so many things that I look forward to when I get my weight loss surgery but I think the biggest change for me will be to regain my "identity"! I have through the years always kept a smile on my face but now it wont be just a mask it will be ME from the inside and OUT satissfied! When people ask me what my goal weight is I answer "I just want to be comfortable being ME"! So good by obesity have a nice trip..........
Do you need an explanation?
Sep 10, 2009
Why have you chosen this as a way to lose weight?
Is it safe?
Do you think it will work?
Have you really looked into it and do you know what it is all about?
Have you tried a "serious" diet?
A serious diet----come on, I have lived my life around those so called "serious" diets and what I have to say is been there done that 20 times over and back. Lose the weight gain it back and some.
Do I need to explain my self NO do I Yes and why???? Because as an obese person I have lived my life explaining myself and making excuses for something that I have let happen. I am here now and saying this is the time to "take the plunge" not for anyone else but myself so there will be no more explaining and just doing. 
