Michelle H.
Hello, my name is Michelle and I am a 36 year old mother to four.
I do not remember a day in my life that I have not had a weight problem. I am the middle child in my family and I was always bigger then my older sister, and even as my "baby" brother got in to his teen years I was bigger then he was.
I can remember being in the 5Th grade and my mom telling me that if I did not stop eating and gaining weight that I would never have a boyfriend. I went on the scale that day and saw I was 136 pounds. I then proceeded to try and figure out in my head if I never gained another pound for the next three years would I be "normal" like everyone else.
Now even though my mom was the one who made these comments to me I know she only did it as her way of trying to help me. My mom was overweight and most of my family members from her side of the family were overweight. I do have to say, not that you will be surprised. I did not accomplish my goal of not gaining another pound in attempts to be "normal" in fact I went on to gain a good amount of weight.
I was drug from Hospital Nutritionists, to TOPS, to Weight Watchers, you name it at a very early age. I would lose 5 pounds, gain 7. I remember my high school graduation and I did not even go dress shopping because "you don't want to be embarrassed" were quietly whispered in my ear. I had my dress made instead. My first "date" was my high school grad, thanks to my sister I did not have to go alone She saw to it that one of her "guy" friends would make sure that I had a good time.
In 1999 I came across something on the Internet about Gastric Bypass. I was intrigued and wanted to know what it was. I did a bit of research and found out that this was my "ticket" to getting out of this fat body and getting to live my life. I went ahead as a very young, very foolish person thinking that I had the tiger by the tale so to speak.
I had Gastric Bypass surgery on December 13Th, 1999. I did amazing and lost 170 pounds. I succeeded finally at getting to where I wanted to be and needed to be.
I Met my now husband and in 2001 I had my first set of twins. My Obgyn and my PCP had no clue about Gastric Bypass let alone nutrition to go along with Pregnancy let alone twin pregnancy and Gastric Bypass. I was put on a very high caloric intake diet, told that if I did not comply to the diet that my babies would not get enough fat for brain growth and they would be born very small and possibly not viable for life. I was put on bed rest and basically ate for nine months. I gave birth to two healthy happy beautiful girls who both were 5 pounds.
In 2003, I had my second set of twins. The same diet and routine was to be followed and once again a beautiful healthy set of twin boys were laid in my arms. The boys were 6 pounds and 4 pounds. I was able to lose all my baby weight and then some both times and looked amazing. Many times people could not believe that I had twins, let alone two sets only 22 months apart.
In 2004 just four short months after my boys were born my mother passed away. It was devastating. I had just lost the women who had become my best friend. 8 months later my Dad passed away. I took such a blow when this happened that I just could not imagine waking up and going on with my life.
I am an emotion eater and I ate my way through the feelings of the death of my parents. I gained 20 pounds and quickly realized I needed to make changes. I joined WW and did wonderful. I got back to basics and I dropped down to quickly.
In 2008 the weight started to come back for no rhyme or reason. My eating had stayed the same, my calories were where they are suppose to be. Since that time I have gained a total of 80 pounds. Testing shows that my Stoma is stretched and my pouch is larger then it should be. I am currently waiting a revision from the RNY to the DS. I am going to be traveling to Brazil to have Dr Marchesini preform this life changing surgery. I will be doing this as a self pay so the surgery is not going to be until later in 2010 but that gives me time to stabilize my labs and get as healthy as possible.
I hope to use this space to journal my way through the process. I want to learn and grow as a person so that this time it really is my last diet.
Blessings
Michelle
