Theresa G.

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I’ve been on the memorial page for the last two hours and I’m scared to death. My son is not even 2 years old yet; am I being selfish in regards to this surgery? I’m in tears… What do I do? The stories I read were heart wrenching; young, old, BMI’s between 36-40, and not too many other heath issues noted; they were from all walks of life; they were you and I. I’m miserable this size and I feel like I’m missing out on life, but do I feel it enough to take the risk of loosing my own life. Signed-having doubts.

I finally got an appointment from Kaiser’s Preventative Medicine for a “Bariatric Information Session”. I wonder if this is a new term for “Orientation”. I’ve been trying to get an appointment since early October but November was booked completely and they thought they may not have a class available until January. Needless to say I’m tickled about my 12/14/07 date. My doctor referred me back in September 2007 for the surgery but only after I completed a 12 week dietary class called “Pathways to Wellness”. I completed the class the 2^nd week of September. I then received a packet via mail which turned out to be a questionnaire with questions like: 1). What do you hope to gain beside weight loss from this surgery. 2). Have you ever been sexually molested or raped. 3). Has anyone in your family ever tried to commit suicide. This questionnaire also required me to list three places I’ve gone to lose weight. Example: Weight Watchers- Jenny Craig. I was also required to get a copy showing I made weekly meetings for at least six months. That was no problem because I’ve been going to a weight clinic here in Pomona, CA off and on since 2003. Well I got my orientation date (at least I think that’s what this is). I’m closer today than I was yesterday.

I am currently calling Kaiser once a week to see if they have an opening for their mandatory 26 week class. When I get discouraged I try to remember that I am closer today than I was yesterday.

I can ' t help but to look ahead in the weeks and months to come and see, "If I start the class by December, maybe I ' ll have my surgery by July 2008." It ' s that type of thinking that makes this waiting game almost unbearable but I try to get a grip.

I seek comfort from my husband (he ' s the love of my life), and my three kids makes the time go by no matter what the wait is (precious gifts in my life)... And that ' s a good thing.