Life Choices

Life really IS what you make it---especially right here, these days.

There's been a LOT of controversy here on the MB, and with good reason. Many of the long-time posters have decided to move to another board. (See my signature for the link.)

I've been enjoying posting here on OH for more than 8 years---but not so much, lately. Why? Because the OH mods have been very...stifling. This has become a place where it's impossible to speak freely, and I HATE that.

It's not like I, personally, have anything really controversial to say---I don't. But I really like to be able to HEAR controversial ideas, any time anyone has some to say. The very LAST thing I want is to have what I can HEAR  (or SAY) be censored before I have a chance to judge for myself whether I want to hear it.

I'm an adult---I have the right to decide what I want to listen to.

 I hear you, Ms Batt.

I am so firmly in maintenance now - you know, Real Life - that any WLS talk pretty much bores me but I force myself to answer some really basic questions (why am I tired...are you getting in enough FLUID? ...Oh! sure, I was dehydrated. huh!) because people did that for ME.  but I need more: more people, more viewpoints, more variety.

my first year post-op was a-typical and it was SO helpful for me to find others that were the same. then, when those in lockstep told me there was only ONE way to do this - I was more comfortable saying, no, there isn't. there are many ways - maybe as many ways as there are people.

and all the most useful lessons I learned on R&R: no, we won't all get along, yes, people can be angry at me and I can deal with that, not everybody I like will like each other. misunderstandings happen, and many more.

now that I have developed the hide of a rhino, I kind of hate to see others not having the OPTION of choosing the same kind of atmosphere. pity!

I expect we will move on - but it isn't easy and it's completely unnecessary. 

How DO you find these pics?

It disturbs me that you find these, and I don't.

MS. BATT-you made some very valid points. I too, have been here a long time. I have seen many "cycles" of this board/site. I have seen several people say "this too shall pass", and I find this sad, as I feel many knowledgable members will have "passed" with it. I have, ABSOLUTELY, appreciated all I have learned about the DS, in order the share the info with others, and wish I had known about it, "back in the dark ages", when I was pre op.

That being said..I, personally, have never been "moderated"..but..I don't really have anything "out of the box" to say/share. If I DID-I would share it-in the best "manners" I could muster, within whatever TOS the site I was using mandated, but I would still share. I may not agree with someone's point of view-but will always defend their rights-in the PRIVATE sector..but, alas, this isn't the private sector.

I have to respect whatever you, and others, choose to do..but I don't have to like it. I sincerely hope you will stay, and continue to share your knowledge-with newbies-and with oldies

Gina,

This message wasn't addressed to me but  I wanted to comment.

I'm one of those noobs, less than two months out.  I need the support of the vets and the way the board is being managed, that support is in a hostile environment and the people that are left, do not necessarily give the best advice.  I'm not talking hostile in terms of snarky responses to noobs.  I'm talking about OH allowing a couple two or three folks to bleed their need for attention all over.

See, if I poke a tiger and the tiger gets mad, I'm smart enough to stop.  If I don't stop, the zoo managment (and no, i'm not comparing OH to a zoo) will make me stop.  Here, it is allowed to play out into a full fledged fiasco.  While fun to watch, it is counterproductive to the intent of OH and not what the advertisers are paying for.

Advertisers come out and these threads directly on top.  Anyone with half a brain can see that one person has incited this kind of waste and that managment has not deal with it.  If they come out more often and see that same poster playing the victim, especially combined with the mass exodus of valuable assets(vets) they will pull their advertising dollar.  Then you have the double standards being given for moderation, sooner or later, everyone here will be caught by it.  This forum is like living on a fault line, no one knows when it's going to shift and we are going to fall in the crater. 

I, for one, will get my information from the vets at the link in my signature line (which OH fixed for me, thank you).   I'll come out here to watch the trainwrecks.  I'll come back to OH as a participating member when they start moderating with transparency.  If telling someone to go away is a TOS violation, the ramifications should be the same for all, not just the one that ****** you off.

nuff said, thanks for listening,

me

Hoosiermoma-I honestly thank you, and respect you for your comments.

Obviously I am a "RNY vet", and am very limited on helping someone with another surgery type when it comes to "mechancial things". For those things I have have always directed them to the experts-Diana, Ms Batt, etc., for the DS, and to Bette for the LB questions.  It saddens me very much to not have Diana's OH links to refer people to.

I am sincerely glad you have found a place you feel comfortable and can find the answers/support you need. That is so very important to successful post op life, IMHO. For me, for now, I find it here--well not HERE, exactly. I have never spent a huge amt of time on the MB. I generally stay on the Tx forum, and come to the MB, when one of my members or a fellow group leader, leads me to a subject here. I am not an OH employee, nor am I an advertiser-just a regular member, like you.

Yes, "train wrecks" gather more advertising "hits"..strange fact of human nature..and I'm as guilty as everyone else..I usually don't comment, as I don't usually have anything to add, of any value...but...yea...I'm a rubbernecker...

Here's to wishing you continued great success on your journey to health!

"See, if I poke a tiger and the tiger gets mad, I'm smart enough to stop.  If I don't stop, the zoo managment (and no, i'm not comparing OH to a zoo) will make me stop."

Wouldn't it be silly if the zoo management got mad at the tiger and got rid of it? Eventually there would be no zoo (or a really, really boring zoo)....just sayin'...

What WOULD the zoo be, without the tiger?

Let's get rid of the little kids carrying sharp sticks.

LIKE

That or take away their sticks...

me