NEED SOME ENCOURAGEMENT

Hi everyone,
I am normally not a Debbie Downer but I'm having a few issues and need some advice, tips and encouragement.
What bothers me most is that our family wa**** hard with financial burden during my extended period of recovery.  I ended up being off work for 9 weeks due to kidney stones and dehydration.  We racked up a bunch of hospital bills on top of hubby having to pay for daycare for both kids, my car and more.  He threw it in my face last night that I hurt us bad financially.  It really bothers me alot.  He has no idea how I feel (& we have been together for 23 years!!!)  I did this for me and him and the kids.  He has no clue.  I have BiPolar Disorder so I have spent alot of $$$ in the past on things not needed so I know he thinks differently about me already with the $$$ issues.  Instead of defending myself (which is hard to do with him) I yelled and screamed and told him to leave and if he didn't, I'd have him removed.  All while my 8 yr old daughter heard and watched.  I hate myself for it but he gets me so dang mad and whenever I try to talk to him, he NEVER tries to see my side of things.

Also, I'm a bit down on my weight loss.  Yess I weigh myself on a daily basis which I know not to do but my scale is like crack to an addict.  I sometimes weigh myself 3 or 4 times a day!  I am 5 ft 3 in and was 270 pounds at preop diet time.  I lost 19 pounds in that time and had my surgery 2/1/12.  I am now down to 223 which is a total weight loss of 46 pounds.  I thought I'd lose more by now.  I feel like the weight is never going to come off like I had wished.  What am I doing wrong?  Is 46 pounds good?  I've hit 3 stalls already!  Will I always be an obese woman?

Lastly, my diet.  I CANNOT do chicken.  I gag it down!  I get 1 maybe 2 protein drinks a day in.  Hardly any water.  My diet consists of protein drinks, eggs, cottage cheese, ground beef, greek yogurt and honey wheat pretzels. 
I need inspiration on recipes, food ideas etc.

I really need you all on this board today.
I am at a loss and I could cry, cry, cry.

I am really trying to reach out to all of you for help!!!!!!!!!
I want to prove to the world that I can do this and I did it for the right reasons and anyone who disagrees with me can.......well.......I won't say. 

First off let me say you can do this! You can heal, get to a healthy weight and manage your other issues. As for a limited diet many of us struggle with that for awhile and I am sure there will be tips and recipes to follow from our fellow OH'ers. What I can hopefully help with is the billing issues. First off, don't ignore them everyone involved hates that. Offer your billers a flat amount under the amount you actually owe and tell them you will begin by sending them an fixed amount towards that debt each month. If any of the bills are for the hospital itself speak to a financial person in your hospital and tell them your situation and also if you are eligible apply for charity care. In this economy  so very many patients are doing this. Either way, the billing depts are usually good with working with folks because the alternative is often they don't get any money at all so some a trickle at a time is better than nothing.

I hope some of what I suggested helped...in the meantime allow me to wish you all the best in health and happiness in the future and I hope your troubles will be far behind you soon. Much good luck to you.

You can do this Michelle!  First of all, if this were me I would make an appointment with my therapist because you definitely need someone to talk to.  Also, you can certainly call your nutritionist as well.  They can help you with what you're eating.  Remember, stress can be a big contributor to weight so that may be part of the issue as well. 

Sometimes a good cry helps as well.  Cry, talk to a therapist, a NUT, and your husband.  Try not to let this get to you.  I know that's easier said than done. 

I wish you all the luck in the world and keep it up.  You are not alone.

You can get through all your struggles. I have attached a song that helps me when i'm down. Good luck to you. Be encouraged.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sGWS1BfNLEM

You need to see the positive side of things. How good you have felt when things were good. Use this forum as much as possible and let your feelings out. I am sure, a few more weeks down the line you will see how things are better. I know that exercise and keeping a diary really helps me. Good luck and hang in there

 Hi! You had surgery almost 2 weeks before me (mine was on Valentines Day) and I have lost 38 pounds so (from my pre op 2 week liquid diet, and 50 pounds from my highest weight) so you're definitely are making good progress. Like you I have the bad habit of weighing myself daily but I feel it really helps me stay on track. At my last meeting with my surgeon he told me that this is not a race and that the weight loss is like a set of stairs- sometimes you go up and sometimes you go down, but you will get there. I've hit the dreaded 3 week stall a few days early, and it was terrible and it did break and I know that there will probably be others before I reach goal. In terms of food I would say force yourself to drink your 64 oz of water, that really help get the scale moving and keeps it moving I've found. Also, the honey wheat pretzels are pretty carby. Chicken is hard for many, but there's turkey, meatballs, tuna and other fish and seafood  and some meatless products for protein. I'm not a cook and tend to eat the same things until I'm sick of them. I still do my protein shakes (1 scoop unflavored protein, 1 scoop Nectar protein, and  1 envelope sf Carnation Instant Breakfast, mixed with unsweetened unflavored say milk, which is a good amount of protein . I 'm glad your health problems seem to be over and hopefully you can now focus on your health and your family and finances. Its OK to put yourself first-sometimes. The flight attendants tell us that on every plane ride.  I believe that you did this surgery for the right reasons-you mention you have an 8 year old daughter and being healthy and involved and present for your children is the greatest motivator of all . I truly believe that you can and will reach your goal , stay focused, remember why you did this major surgery, up your water and protein intake  and cut the carbs, try walking or some type of excercise-its a great stress reducer, and you will surely succeed. i hope I was able to help and I wish you all the best on this journey.

 I just realized we share the same name too!

Thanks for the advice.  I think I just needed to rant and vent.
I know in my heart it will work.  I am just the kind of person who wants instant results.
I guess I need to learn to SLOW DOWN!!!!!!!

Michelle

P.S. Michele - Isn't it a great name (hehehe)