beccabecca66
Fear and Depression
Nov 07, 2011
I felt so centered the last few months. Felt like I was okay. Felt confident.It vanished.
I'm so depressed. Its like the bottom dropped out on me. It sucks.
I'm terrified of gaining weight back, and I haven't even reached goal yet... although I don't really know what my final goal *should* be. I think I plugged in 150 as my goal weight way back when. I can't remember if or what surgeon said would be reasonable.
I started tracking food and activity. This could be good or bad.
I had my 1 year follow up appt and they ran my labs. Everything was in normal range, except vitamin d (27.2) This might account for the depression. I hope its that simple.
My white blood count was a bit low (2.9), but the rest of the blood stuff came back normal, so I don't know that it really means anything.
My therapist wants me to see a psychiatrist again and consider taking an antidepressant. She's very insistent on this. She's never seen me this low. She is positive I can get back to where I was earlier this year.
I've been off of psychotropic meds since early this year and been okay. The thought of going back on them scares me. Many of them contributed to my weight in some ways. I'm not one that blames all the weight gain on meds... I take responsibility for putting all that food in my mouth... however there is something to be said about the intense carb cravings that were a side effect.
