Finding My Feet Again

Mar 17, 2011

My last blog was written while I was shell shock from some realizations.  Today I'm feeling better.  I have a tough road ahead of me in regards to this difficult relationship.  But, this is part of my journey.  I knew when I had my surgery that I'd be breaking my food addiction and I knew junk was going to come up.  It has.  BOY, has it! 

This time is about me.  I'm usually a selfless person, selfless to the point that I literally lost my self.  I'm getting her back and boy have I missed me!  I like myself so much now.  I get offended when people mistreat me now, not because they're mean but because I don't let people hurt my friends.  I am now my own best friend.  My best friend deserves respect. 

As for my difficult relationship person, well, the relationship is in a peaceful lull.  That's a good thing.  I think I have about two weeks before the feces hits the oscillator.  But, we'll see.  I have a strategy in place and I'm working toward unentangling myself from the toxicity.  Until that happens, I realize that I don't have to play the games and I don't have to join the drama.  That's an automatic improvement.

As for my weight loss, the stall has officially broken and that is reason to cheer!  I'm having to be careful about emotional eating right now.  Yesterday I forgot to eat breakfast, which is not good, but for me it was a signal that my head got away from the food for comfort mode, at least for a bit of time.

My life is changing.  Good and awful are happening all at the same time.  I'm enduring the awful and enjoying the good.  Blessings to all of you in your journey!

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