Dorine63

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Thank goodness my first plateau only last 1 week. It was frustrating even though I kept telling myself that it is part of weight loss. Any delays in weight loss is very frustrating for me and I have a tendency to sabotage myself. As I have so much to lose, I feel that as long as I keep my calorie count below 800 (usually 500) and do my exercise a minimum of 3 times a week (normally do 5-6 days) I should continue to lose every week especially since I have almost 200 lbs. to lose.   Have heard everyone talk about plateaus and that they are a part of weight loss as they give the body time to adjust to the weight loss. As I have lost 60 lbs. in 7 weeks; if I think about it, that is a large weight loss, and it is understandable that my body would need to readjust. Am fitting into clothing that I haven't worn for 2 years. Also took my measurements, and that was a shock. Have lost 5 inches off my chest, 2 inches off my waist, and 7 inches from my hips. That doesn't include the loss on my arms and legs. Needed a pick-up on my plateau week and that sure did it. Am back to losing as I lost 5 lbs. this week bringing me to the 60 lb. mark. Was wanting to lose 100 lbs. my first 90 days, but am having some doubt that I will meet that goal--bummer. However, I made that goal when I was planning on having the BPD/DS. As the sleeve is only half the procedure compared to the other, I have to remember that my weight loss is not going to be as rapid. My surgeon told me that the issue with my liver was due to fatty tissue and that when my weight loss slows (6-9 months) we can do testing on the liver to ensure that the DS portion won't jeopardize it. It we can do that, I will be going through another huge weight loss then. So, I need to reanalyze my thinking and goals. Maybe the first thing is not to put a date on the number of pounds I am wanting to lose. I don't want to frustrate myself by not meeting the goal and it is not something that is in my control. I need to make goals that I can control such as my exercise program or clothing I would like to wear. In some way I am feeling that some things have gotten off track and that I need to get things back in-line or at least more focused.  

I think it is time to put my schedule on the refrigerator again. During pre-op I made out my diet plan and ate accordingly. It helped to stay on track and to control my intake. I have been having problems getting proteins to stay down or consuming enough proteins . I think I need to start using the menu again just to get my proteins in. Will probably have to go back to the protein shakes and Greek yogurt to get the protein levels up and retry adding meats again at a slower rate.  It will also give me time to start putting together recipes and shopping lists from my bariatric cookbooks. Have been eating a lot like I use to in very small quantities. Have seen that it not a good plan--too many carbs, not enough protein, and have almost felt bulimic with how much I get nauseated and vomit after eating. Still able to keep down at least 300 calories a day, but will probably lead to future problems if I don't get it under control.  

Am so happy today! While I did not lose weight this week, I took my measurement for the first time since I started my pre-op diet. What a shock that was! And was I ever pleased. I have lost 2 inches off my waist, 4 inches off my chest, and 7 inches off my hips. Yes, 7 inches off my hips! Wow!! I feel so much better. Was able to get into a pair of jean shorts that I haven't been able to wear for a year. Mom was here as we were going into town and she told me how wonderful I looked. While I thanked her for the compliment, my brain was saying "for a fat woman" until I walked in front of my full length mirror. I had to stop, back up, and look. It was then that I realized the weight loss was noticeable and I really did look good in my outfit. I was walking on cloud nine!

Today brought another pleasant situation. It was the first day in almost 2 weeks that I haven't had nausea and vomiting. I did not take the medication that I suspected was causing the problem. I have felt good; ate my meals; drank my fluids; and had no problems. It has just been an upbeat day. Even had my niece stop by for a visit. We have always been close even to the point of taking multiple vacations together. Things are definitely starting to look better and I am starting to feel like I am on top of the world. Thanks to all who were so supportive and let me vent during my difficult time. It is people like you that make this world a better place.

Contacted Dr. due to the stomach pain, nausea and vomiting. Have been having problem with eating and drinking. Every time I try to eat I have a lot of nausea and abdominal pain, and will often vomit or want badly to vomit so the pain will decrease. When I drink I feel a lot of pressure and have a knot to the side of my stomach. The Bariatric Nurse was going to have me come in to see the Nurse Practitioner before my regular appointment on Tues., but see ended up seeing my surgeon and had me hold. He wants to see my lab to get an idea of what may be going on before he has me come in. So tomorrow morning am getting lab, and hope that it will give us an idea of where to start. Am tired of feeling discomfort, pain, nausea, and get a bad headache every time I put something in my mouth. Eat about 500 calories a day, but it is not "good" food. If I ate according to my hunger and how my stomach feels, I consume about 150-200 calories. I know there is a problem with my protein intake. Usually it is under 20 grams a day; on the days I am able to drink my protein shake I get about 30 grams. Will figure out the problem and I am sure the Dr. will get me back on track.

Am now 5 weeks post-op and am feeling great, loving exercising , and hating to eat . Still having problems with stomach bubbles, nausea, and vomiting. Before anyone makes the statement--I am calling my surgeon on Monday and have a follow-up appointment for next week. As long as there are no complications that need addressed, I am happy that my stomach (Bruiser) is so finicky. It keeps me from over-eating and I am attentive to what I eat and how it will affect me.  Have lost 56 lbs in 4 1/2 weeks and that is what has me feeling good, both mentally and physically. I can see and feel my clothing getting loose on me. I feel like exercising and enjoy it when I am doing it. I don't feel like I just want to drop after a minute or two, and afterwards I feel so positive and rejuvenated. It is so funny when I put my shoes on as I have 2 dogs. Before they would lay around and not move until I call them; now when I put my shoes on they both perk up their heads, jump into standing position and are primed for one of our walks. It seems that they have been trained that my shoes mean one of our frequent walks. It is so cute to me that it makes me want to walk.   As I said before, my stomach is very temperamental. I choose to look at it as a positive thing as I am one of those hard learners when it comes to eating. The miserable feeling when I eat the wrong thing or too much is good at teaching me portion control. I have tried measuring everything out that I am going to eat to the appropriate amount, but I am now finding out that it is only a part of portion control. Usually doing this results in 2-3 meals. Have learned that it is important to keep food to the correct serving size, but you also need to look at the whole plate and how much total is there. While my plate (which I have started using a small dessert plate) may only have 200 calories of food in the correct serving size, the complete plat of food is more than my stomach can consume. Therefore, most of the time I have to put half of the food in a container to warm up for another meal . The vomiting is a firm reinforcer to not eat the wrong foods and to listen to my body, eat slowly so I can recognize the signals from my stomach before I get to the vomiting stage. 

Did make a change this week in my goal weight. Have had several people voice concerns about me having a goal of 140 which is what charts show as a normal weight for my height. While I stuck to the choice as that is what a "chart" recommends, my signif/other made some arguments that made me reconsider that goal. At first when he found out the goal weight was to say "No, that is too much." At first he was throwing "Are you just wanting to be thinner than me?", "Where did you come up with 140 as a goal?", What is your motivation for that weight?" I started really thinking about that figure and realized that that weight was chose from an abstract chart and that others that were close to my starting weight had achieved it so had "Why can't I?" attitude. He than stood up and asked, "Do I look fat and overweight?" I stated, "No" and his reply was "So you could be happy about this weight" and guessed that he weighed 185 lbs. I replied "yes" and he stated to get the scale out. His actual weight was 162. We talked for another hour discussing reality vs. fantasy. I have been obese my entire life and getting down to a "chart" weight may not be a reality for my body. He also stated not to set myself up for failure; that I needed to set a goal weight that is achievable and reasonable then if I am able to set a lower goal do it in increments so I am not possibly setting myself up for one big fail instead of many little successes. As he made sense, and looking at my health, I decided to change my goal weight to 175 lbs. I would be under 200 which is important to me, that weight would not over-stress my body, and I believe that I could comfortable. (He also stated he like a little "meat" on the bones of his woman.) Had to smile at that. He loves me no matter what, but as long as I am losing weight, I guess he is putting in suggestions to sculpt his ideal woman. He was understanding when I told him how I wanted to shop at regular-sized clothing store and not have to pay extra for larger sizes, to wear any swimsuit I liked without having to look for suits that cover fat so I don't have disgusting fat hanging out, or be able to sit in a chair without hoping it doesn't collapse. He stated he understood and his concerns about me setting myself for failure would be alleviated if I did my goals in achievable increments. So we discussed weights and what we would both agree is a good starting goal which was  175. When I reach that, we will look at whether I feel good and am comfortable at that weight or if I want to lose more and set a goal at another 10-25 lbs. lower.  

While my depression gets to me sometimes, spent the day in bed a couple days ago and it affects my appetite, I am trying to keep working on improving it so that I don't episodes. However it is hard as I live in a small town of probably less than 300 people, no vehicle, no transportation system, no businesses other that post office, and very very few community activities. Needless to say--I spend a lot of time on the phone. Signif/other does provide transportation and we occasionally go on outings, but he works 40 hours a week and his car has so many quirks that I would not feel comfortable driving it and he prefers to drive me because of all the problems. He is very protective of me since I almost died a year ago due to a medical emergency. Am going to talk to Dr. at my appointment next week as may have to adjust. In addition have had a headache for almost a week; would like to get rid of that. Ok, enough with the negative.

Even though having a few problems, as everyone does, I am feeling good about myself and what I am achieving. I feel that I am a success and that my life is improving. I have a superb support system that not only cheers me on, but also makes me look at things realistically so that the achievements continue so I have a positive outlook. Thanks everyone for being there for me and wanting "everything to come up roses". You are my roses and you make a beautiful bouquet. Love you much.  

It has been a good week. While I only lost 3 lbs. this week, it is still losing and the scale going in the right direction. I guess this is one of those plateau moments, especially since I have reached the 1 month mark. I have another 10 days until my next follow-up visit. In that time I am going to be working on losing my last 2.5 lbs to have a total of 50 lbs weight loss at my 1 month visit.  Whether or not I make it to my goal for the visit, I am happy to see the scale numbers going down instead of up. I was totally amazed a couple of days ago when I went on a walk with my signif/other. (He is close to a healthy weight and has a job where he walks for at least 6 out of 8 hours a day.)We I was able to keep up with his pace and still have a conversation. Usually I fall behind and cannot talk at all. We did a mile walk with our dogs and were able to enjoy the time.  Afterwards we sat on the front deck chatting, watching the dogs roam the yard, and enjoying the weather.  It is something that we haven't done for a while and felt wonderful. He even made a funny comment about me "getting skinny". Although I have a lot of weight to lose, it is awesome that he has noticed and appreciates what I am doing. While I have wonderful support from multiple people, others have noticed how closely he "protects" me., even from myself. He keeps me on track by motivating me to exercise on those days I feel "lazy", and can even be over-bearing about my diet. When I mentioned something I want, he would tell me I can't have it if it is not on my doctor's recommended diet. He is not mean about it, but he does know me enough (together for 8 years) to know how to put things in a way that I respond to in a positive way. Sometimes it seems that every success I accomplish is an accomplishment for both of us. With a second thought, I guess it is as the healthier I get, the more we do together because I feel better and more energetic. Believe that this is going to be an enlightening summer. 

I have started the hard part of my post-op diet I think. I am up to a pureed diet and my stomach is not happy with it. Occasionally I am able to keep food down, but most of the time it is coming back up within a couple of minutes. Am having to do snacks that are from my liquid diets. Am able to drink my fluids so I don't get dehydrated which is good. With going through this phase where I get nauseated and vomiting so easily, I frequently don't feel hunger and when I do a 4 oz glass of milk sounds like a good meal. I know that a lot of people have said that it gets better once the stomach heals from the surgery, but since I have advanced from a clear liquid diet, my stomach (nicknamed "Bruiser") has been in a temperamental turmoil. There are a few things that I know will stay down, but one can only eat so much cream soup, mashed potatoes, and ground beef. Sometimes it feels as food has went from a comfort item to my worst enemy. I know that food is to be a means of survival, but right now there is not much that will stay down so basically I am still on a starvation diet. It is lucky if I am able to consume 500 calories a day. Most of the time it is closer to 300. I am doing well at weight loss as I am down 45 lbs. in 3 weeks. The rough part is the days that "Bruiser" throws back at me everything I eat, it is hard to keep my energy level up so I can keep up with my exercise routine. I love to workout or walk, but lately with getting sick so much I just want to take a nap. I am looking forward to the day when my stomach is done healing and becomes a little more stable so I know what to eat and how it will affect me. 

For months since my sister found out that I had chosen to have WLS, she has been very supportive. She is one of the first to give encouragement and asking how I am progressing. She was even at the hospital the morning of my surgery to give me support. Now it is my turn to be there for her as she has decided to also have WLS. On Saturday we are going to her seminar. I was so excited for her when she told me that I put together a binder for her to keep all her information in and made a list of all the contacts and physicians information that she will need for her pre-req's as she has the same insurance I do. Wanted to make it as easy for her as possible as there is enough things to worry about then whether or not the pencil-pushers think the surgery is a good idea. It is nice that we will be able to share this experience. Her surgery will be about 6-8 months after mine which was 2 weeks ago. Get-togethers will be easier as we know that each other will be bringing something that both of us will be able to eat.

My brother, who is a trucker, was able to make it home late on the 4th. So, for a surprise he and Mom picked up all the fixings for a 4th celebration on the 5th. We grilled and enjoyed the company. It was my first holiday since my surgery 2 weeks ago. The sad part is I am still on the liquid diet so I had to enjoy my protein shake (made it chocolate for a treat). Was unusual, but was not as difficult as I thought it would be. Am sure that it will get easier as I get more time getting use to my new stomach and how to eat meals/foods that are healthy and nutritious. In addition to all the grillin's, he also bought a bunch of fireworks that ended up being about a 90 minute show. As a lot of them were aerial, most of the small town we live in were able to enjoy them as well. Is going to turn into a busy week as next Saturday I go with my little sister to her seminar to start the WLS journey. She has been a big cheerleader/supporter to me and it is a pleasure to be there for her. Have lost 36 lbs. in the last 2 weeks and have started giving my sister some of my clothes to get her to her surgery. Am looking forward to the surprises that will happen when Labor Day rolls around. Who knows how much I will have lost, what I will be able to tolerate for food (at least it will be solid), and the surprise from those who haven't seen me for a while.  I love the shock value right now, especially from those that always expected my to be fat my entire life. (Am even amazing myself) Hope everyone had as wonderful a holiday as I did!!

Happy 4th of July to all my friends and OH co-subscribers. Hoping everyone has a fun and safe day. We are going to spend the day at home. I am 2 weeks post-op so cannot eat anything and he doesn't want to tempt me and risk me getting sick. (Very considerate of him, but have had vomiting and "dumping" so would not risk them again.) Then there is me having to pack my special diet, and we don't want to go through the hassle right now. By the time the next holiday rolls around, I will be back on regular food and the holiday will be a lot better. Kind of like the idea of spending the day together just the 2 of us. (Very cosy).

Have been on my diuretic for 3 days now and I feel so much better. Have lost 30 lbs. in the last 3 days and feel so good I was able to take a 3/4 mile walk this evening. Can't believe I lost that much in such a short time. I know that I have been retaining, but wow. In just that short of time I went from fitted clothing to clothes that are baggy on me. The only problem I have had is that I am getting very dizzy each day. Called both PCP and surgeon to let them know. My PCP told me to half the dose of my diuretic as I may be losing fluids too fast. Hope that that is what is making me dizzy. Would love to keep dropping weight this fast, but know that my body has to keep up with my weight loss and it will level out.