DustinD
Four years later
Jun 02, 2013
I'm finding it agonizingly hard to make this post. It's been 4 years since my surgery, and while I haven't regained half the weight I lost at my peak, I've definately regained a lot. I'm currently at 278.8 lbs and the best I saw on the scale was 255. It's no fault of the surgery, but a result of choices that I've made. I drink while I eat, before this last week I had not been working out barely at all, I don't stop when I feel full, and I have made just flat out poor food choices. Basically everything that I was doing before the surgery.
But it's June 2013, and June seems to be the magic time for me to realize that I need change. My original goal was to get to 230 lbs, 100 down from my heaviest. It may take me a while to get there, but I'm making changes today. TODAY. I refuse to see 280 on that scale, and I'm sick of seeing anything with 270 in it as well. I choose to be thinner right now. (BTW, there is power in seeing this in writing!)
I went through a period of time here, where I was blaming my increased eating on a "stretched" sleeve. However I don't truly believe that it is beyond recovery. I think more than anything it's the habits that I let creep back in. It's just so easy to make excuses for myself and want to be able to eat like what I consider a "normal" person. No more.
I do wan't to say, I was pretty distraught to find that none of the friends that I had listed on this website, have posted in years. I was hoping to find some sort of similar story I guess? A success story this many years out, that would help me believe. Even with a community like this available sometimes it's easy to feel alone in this struggle. However maybe it's my duty to be that motivation. I did it before, I will do it again.
BTW, looking back at my previous posts, many of my goals were realized outside of weight loss. I graduated with my Bachelors degree, I am half way through the Masters program to a change of career to Counseling. That is exciting, though it has obviously taken longer than I'd hoped. But other positive changes happened as well... I moved to Denton, TX and the kids are with us full time now. I took a new job, which was desperately needed in Lewisville. Though it's by no means what I really want to do again, it is much less stressful and more balanced. I don't feel as micro managed as I was, and my day to day activity is led by actual need versus my bosses opinion of using my time.
Anyways, enough for now. I'm glad I posted even though it may never be ready by another. :)
