Jerilynk75

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...at least not pre-op.

Let's be honest.  You're talking to a "meat and potatoes" West Texas farm girl.  Chances are, if it "Mooooo'd" regularly while it was alive....I'm more than happy to put a slab of it on my plate for dinner...or lunch.  Ok, even breakfast. 

Can anyone tell that I am craving steak?

I don't think I was quite ready to divorce food.  I almost wish I had been given an extra week - a reprieve...a last meal for the condemned, maybe?  But, I went in for my initial workshop on August 9th, met all the criteria, signed all of my paperwork...and was told, "August 24th surgery...you're on shakes starting NOW."  *jaw hit floor* 

The liquid diet has been a major pain in the butt  - I have ordered some pre-measured shakes from Advocare, some stuff from Unjury and a few things from Bariatric Advantage...and am waiting for those to arrive.  So, for now - I am mixing my own shakes utilizing Dymatize's Iso100 in Gourmet Vanilla.  No fat, no carbs, no lactose.  Toss that in with a bit of water and ice - and I have a shake.  If I am feeling adventurous, I add a bit of almond extract, or some sugar free cocoa powder.  It is not much different than what I was doing for breakfast prior to prepping for surgery.  (I was having a protein powder shake with 2tbsp fat free yogurt, 1 cup skim milk, and one cup frozen fruit.) 

But, I still want a steak.  No matter how much protein I am ingesting (right now I am over 100g...and I am 9 days pre-op), I am starving.  And, I am not talking about 'head hunger' here.  I am tummy grumbling and salivating over a non-existent steak.  I have downed almost 200oz of water today...but my body is still screaming for a steak.  

I did finally have to give in and have some chicken on Saturday - I was as weak as a kitten could barely get out of bed that morning.  My orders were to lose 10lbs between 8/9 and 8/24 - - and I had lost 7.1 of those pounds by 8/13.  At that rate, I was probably heading to a 20lb loss.  I am not going to complain about that - -but I did want to keep my energy up and ensure I was getting adequate protein.  So, some chicken it was!

And, the result was noticeable.  On Sunday morning, I got up and was so full of energy and tore through so much housework I qualified for the term "domestic goddess".  I say I may need some lean protein up until a few days before surgery.  In talking to other patients in my surgeon's office - almost all of them are having shakes as well as one small meal (Lean Cuisine, Smart Ones).  All I want/need is half a piece of boneless, skinless chicken breast!

So, crossing my fingers that this doesn't get me into trouble....but I am adding that protein. 

On June 6, 2007....I got the call that every little girl fears and prays will never come. 

"Your daddy is gone."

Gone.  At 56, he went to sleep one night and suffered a massive heart attack. 
Gone.  Leaving behind his wife of almost 34 years, as well as four children, ages 31, 30, 28 and 27.
Gone.

My father had always struggled with his weight, and I had urged him to consider WLS.  But, he was a farmer and owned a freight company - no insurance.  It wasn't an option, financially. 
I was in no position to help him, either. 

Then, he was gone. 

I made myself a promise  when he died - - that I was going to do everything in my power to shed my excess weight and start caring for myself at least as much as I care for others.  I gave myself four years to accomplish this. 

I have never been a tiny girl, myself.  I am a West Texas farm girl - I was raised on a cotton farm and in a catering business.  You worked hard - you ate big meals.   But, I still managed to maintain a somewhat average weight throughout high school and into college.  I was a varsity cheerleader, I played basketball, I ran track and even (grudgingly) ran cross country. 

Then, something happened.  No matter what I did, weight started creeping up.  In my case, PCOS reared its ugly head and took over my life.  I tried low-carb, I tried Body for Life, I tried Weight Watchers, Nutri-System, HCG, 17 Day Diet, phentermine, Advocare, Herbalife.  (Sounds familiar, doesn't it?)

I could drop a few pounds - - as many as 25....before I would stall.  And not just a 'correction'....a months-long stall.  I would switch up my eating plan, radically change my exercise program.  Nothing.  I would get discouraged and give up....and the weight would creep back up. 

I hit the four-year mark in June of 2011....at my highest weight ever.  I was ready to give it another go around with yet another 'diet'.  Morbidly obese at 252lbs, depressed...with horrible skin, bone spurs in my heels, a bum knee (thank you HS basketball!) and all sorts of aches and pains.  I felt 65 instead of 35. 

In July, I went in for a routine physical and got a shock - an abnormal ECG.  My genes and lifestyle were catching up to me.   The PCOS and associated insulin-resistance was much worse.  I finally broke down and told my doctor that I had been considering WLS for a couple of years.  

August 9th, I visited Dr. Davidson at BSC.  August 10th, I went back for their pre-op educational class and had a cardiac stress test. 
I started my all-liquid pre-op diet on August 9th.....and am scheduled for a sleeve on August 24th. 

Yes, it looks like a whirlwind....but it is a carefully orchestrated one.  I have been a lurker on the boards for ages...I have read studies, papers, spent time quizzing other WLS patients on their experiences....researched more surgeons than I care to name...and finally decided on the best approach for me.

It's also 'fast' because I am a self-pay client.  My insurance coverage has specific exclusions for WLS surgery.  I find it absurd (and I am the HR Manager!) but feel very strongly that this is an investment in my health and future - - I spent THREE times this much on my last car.....so why not spend money on my health?

I will be surfing the boards as my surgery date nears - - and will be relying on you vets to help talk me down from minor freak-outs, pre-op jitters....and help comfort me during those difficult recovery weeks. 
(I keep repeating to myself "I will have NO PAIN, I will have NO PAIN.  I will have no NO NAUSEA, I will have NO NAUSEA.")

Bless all of you for all of your knowledge and your willingness to share and support one another - I am thankful to have found you all.