shannonmcgee
I have been heavy my entire life. I always was able to scan the room and say "im not the heaviest one here" or "Im not THAT overweight". In high school I wore size 18. I felt fat but always said to my self that I was thankful that I was not at 200 pounds yet. Well after the birth of my son in 1996 that all changed. I reached 209. Then I convinced myself that it was not that bad. Other people weigh more. Always comparing myself to others. over the next few years I would fluctuate between 220-240. Loosing some, gaining some. I was so happy not to be that person who weighed 250. But that time came. 250 came and went and extra pounds added up. Before I knew it I was weighing in at 272. I knew I ha to stop this because 300 was not an option.
I have not really had many medical problems that I could not handle. I am a nurse so I stay pretty active. I take care of patients daily and I am on my feet constantly. I don't get out of breath at work because my body is used to it. But lugging this 260 pound body around daily is not without effort. My feet would hurt, especially on the balls of my feet. Depending on what I ate, I would get some edema by the end of the day. I knew to elevate them and it would go away. but mostly it was my back. I have a lot of belly fat which cause a lot of back pain. I don't sit up straight because my breasts are large. When I sit I tend to push my shoulders forward to compensate for their size. I do not have diabetes YET but I am well on my way. my HGBA1C is right on the edge. I am thankful that my blood pressure is low but I know that too could change. My body is giving up. I can tell that it has fought a good fight and needs m to love it again. I have abused it not by alcohol or drugs but by food.
I tired several diets in the past 20 years. Phen fen in the mid 90's was my first attempt to seriously loose weight. I got down to 186 before it was banned. That 20 pound weight loss made me feel so good. But then the hunger came back. I would loose the weight only to regain it back. I have tried Atkins, weight watchers, wt loss meds, south beach, slim fast, mayo clinic diets.My problem is that my full button is broke, or I was born without it. I was never full. I remember eating a full course meal (salad, breadsticks, Cheese ravioli, wine and tiramisu) and was still looking for something to snack on later. I know I was not hungry but my body did not know that. Diets tell you if you are hungry to eat a small apple or handful of nuts. That was never satisfying enough so I would eats the apple plus a sandwich, chips, cheese and crackers all with 2 cokes. Only to find out 10 min later I was still not full. My weakness is cheese. I can eat a brick of chees in 10 min. That too has got to stop. I am eating to feel that fullness which I never achieve.
I will be 40 in February. I want this for my health and for my life. I do not want to go the rest of my life killing my body. I am excited about my journey and hope to be an inspiration to others.
