Way too much harshness here...Sometimes

Jaiart
on 12/2/12 8:44 pm, edited 12/2/12 8:47 pm - MI
I've noticed that some people on this board get personally offended when people don't simply get in line and follow their "advice". I mean I've read people getting downright mean and nasty towards each other. I understand that many of the vets here have been through a lot and want to share what they have learned but you vets also must realise that people are sentient beings and don't just follow others. Push back is to be expected in issues that really matter to individuals. This is not to discount your vast knowledge and experience but remember the old adage "convinced against your will, of the same opinion still". So respect people's opinions offer yours but allow people to express theirs without personal attacks and brow beating into submission.

 

determineddanni
on 12/2/12 9:26 pm
It doesn't bother me but then again maybe I am not as sensitive. I know when people give opinions they are only trying to help you you. Sometimes people aren't the best at putting it out there but I always look at the content they are telling me and I don't get wrapped up in delivery. Besides what makes this country so great is our voice, you can't tell people how to speak they will just take offense. It's ok to have different opinions and its ok to argue over them.
I have learned a long time ago life it not all flowers and butterflies.

HW 259          SW 256          CW 141       GW 150
             

bugirll
on 12/3/12 2:42 am - MD
DS on 03/19/12

A strong response is warranted when potentially life threatening advice is spewed.  There is a LOT of very bad information out there about the DS.  Newbies do not need rainbows.  They need accurate information.  In order to be a good DSer, a thick skin is needed.  It is not a sensitive person's surgery.  A DSer, in there travels, will need to be able to advocate for themselves and put up a fight to get the health care that they need.  If someone can not handle their inaccurate and deadly information being rebutted, then they need not have the DS.

DS with Toon Sonneville 3/19/12
A. C
on 12/3/12 4:24 am

I totally agree!  Sometimes it comes from the NUTS!

Jaiart
on 12/3/12 2:50 am - MI
This post isn't about people being quiet it's about people being indignant when people offer the sincere advice and it's ill recieved by others here. Then the name calling and insults start flying. That will discourage newbies from asking questions due to a fear of being ill recieved and the treatment they will recieve. So the key is to advise and debate but allow others to have their opinions as well. In the words of the late Dr. Martin Luther King we must disagree without being disagreeable. Just my two cents and apparently oh.com agrees which is why they posted that comment about flaming etc...

 

bugirll
on 12/3/12 2:58 am - MD
DS on 03/19/12

Then why post this if the great OH has already told us to play nice in the sand box.  Who's the one inciting now?

DS with Toon Sonneville 3/19/12
Jaiart
on 12/3/12 3:04 am - MI
A good message bears repeating

 

determineddanni
on 12/3/12 3:47 am

i haven't seen any personal attacks or name calling in a long time. at least what i warrant as name calling and personal attacks. i see generalized stuff to get through to people but i haven't seen outright personal hatred towards another person. maybe some tough love but that is about it, did i miss something.

i agree that pre-ops will definitely need to have some tough skin getting the DS. you will have to fight for the right care for the rest of your life. i know that might seem easy to read but in all reality it is a very tough job and if you were to meek, this surgery might not be for you.

hell! i know i wasn't ready mentally any earlier than when i got my surgery:) i was such a pushover, then i got screwed by too many a doctor and that was the turning point menatlly.

HW 259          SW 256          CW 141       GW 150
             

* Gail R *
on 12/3/12 4:11 am - SF Bay Area, CA

Gosh, I read nearly everyday. Did I miss something? I like drama as much as the next person but haven't seen any here at all. Whatcha talking about?

~Gail R~  high wt.288,  surg wt 274, LW 143, CW 153,  GW164

bugirll
on 12/3/12 4:19 am - MD
DS on 03/19/12

Someone posted to the OP that a DSer can be vegan or something along those lines.  Turns out that person had RNY and kept spouting how vegan is okay with the DS(something alone those lines).  Her false information was rebutted.  Then the mommy button got pushed and OH moderated the hell out of a tread, or two, I can't remember.

Now the OP want to incite more drama by bringing it up again after OH already put out warnings.

DS with Toon Sonneville 3/19/12
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