If I leave my house I'm gonna eat!

Have been on emotional overload the past 36 hours (for those following my story - I have an update on my situation with V & Destiny that I promise to post soon...) and combined with anxiety-related sleep deprivation I am near my breaking point. I feel trapped here at home but I know that if I go out I will eat and eat a LOT of ice cream (sucks that I am craving my biggest food AND one of the easiest things to slip by my band). I went to my support group last night and had been planning to do grocery shopping afterwards. Felt so vulnerable foodwise that I just came home. Same thing today - had jury duty and then had to come straight home. I've done all the right things - drank my water, eaten good, healthy, protein-filled/first meals - but feel on the verge of a major slip. Honestly I'm anticipating a late night food run at this point. I've done the if-you-want-it-tomorrow-you-can-have-it-thing and yes its now tomorrow and I still want it! I'm afraid to allow myself even a little to stop the deprivation battle in my head because I don't trust myself to only buy a pint let alone a single cone or dish somewhere. Don't know what I'm looking for here - don't feel really receptive to suggestions but also don't want to sabotage myself. I do NOT want to eat over my feelings anymore!!! And I certainly don't want to give V the power to make me eat over her and her actions. Caeli

JUST DONT DO IT!!!! TAKE A TYLENOL PM and GO TO BED or go run around the block, or go iron, or go buy a new pair of shoes just dont go to Dairy Queen. You will be madder at yourself in the morning. Plus you do not want to give anyone (that includes yourself) the power to make you fail. Sorry for the strong post but you sounded just like me, so I had to say what someone should say to me EVERYDAY ;) Good luck and stay strong, tomorrow will be better than today

Hi Caeli, I know how you feel, and yes I've wanted to stuff my face with junk food, then had all the guilt afterwards. But then I started to compromise with myself to where I don't deprive myself either. Why don't you go and get your ice cream, which is my favorite too, but get a small cone of something you like. You SHOULD be able to enjoy it once or twice a week, but compromise and make it a smaller portion. Make it something you will enjoy and eat it slow. Make sure happy thoughts are going through your mind when you have every bite, and then be satisfied, then done. Good luck, and enjoy yourself. Lea P.S. Don't beat yourself up, but don't get out of control.

Good for you for not going to the grocery store!! You know what it takes to resist that pesky thing in our heads that whispers things about trigger foods!! You are very wise....... take a shower , paint your toenails..... drink some hot tea , have a small treat and GO TO BED AND FORGETTABOUT IT!! tomorrow start off with a BIG breakfast ( if you can) and have a great day! Carolyn

Caeli--Hang in there girlfriend! How about a big hot bathtub? Soak and soak and soak! Hope it helps! Joan F

Caeli Can't you stop at DQ or better yet TCBY for a lowfat ice cream/yogurt? If you still have the craving, I really think you should go for a single serving goody before you go out and buy a quart like I did!

Thanks, Julie. I decided to go for the single serving and feel so much better (and no longer on the verge of self-destruction). Sometimes you just need permission to have that treat, you know? Caeli

I am so sorry you are feeling badly. I hope you take that going out money and treat yourself to a pedicure and a foot rub or even a massage instead of food. Maybe buy yourself a pair of winning sandals, new lingerie, anything but snacks. Liz

Sorry your feeling down. You are such an inspiration to so many on this board. Your posts are so considerate and helpful. I'm sure you may not want to do this but I have found that a ff/sf fudgecicle cures all for me. It has about 40 calories and cures my chocolate and ice cream cravings all at one time. Take care of youself and if you do decide to go out, go for those first. Straight to the frozen foods, checkout and out the door. I sure hope you feel better. Tammy

Caeli take it easy...everything will be ok. You should not deprive yourself of the things you want. If you do, it leads to what you are feeling right now. I will tell you something. Blue Bell makes this delicious, no sugar added, ice-cream that is only 100 calories a cup. I can only eat a cup before feeling stuffed. I put it in a regular coffee mug, and sometimes I add 2 tblsp of fat free whip cream. I am telling you, this icecream DOES NOT TASTE LIKE DIET ICECREAM!! I wouldn't kid you. Try it. I keep a tub in my freezer, it is always there if I want it. Half the time I eat dinner and I am still too full to have anything else but if I am not, yes I let myself have a cup of icecream. I have been steadily losing a half a pound a day, I exercise, I keep my food intake under 1500. You can do this. I just read your profile, I just got into size 20s too!! Don't you just love it!!??