Judgementalism
How sad, that we as formerly fat or still struggling people, take such glee in the failure of others. How sad that we don't have enough kindness and empathy within ourselves to understand and not bash or put down. Does making it a public figure make it "okay"?
Days on end I read about friends here feeling judged. And days on end everyone supports and encourages them.
How sad that we make targets out of those we don't know. What hypocrites we've become in some cases.
Never the person I strive to become. Never the person I will be.
Days on end I read about friends here feeling judged. And days on end everyone supports and encourages them.
How sad that we make targets out of those we don't know. What hypocrites we've become in some cases.
Never the person I strive to become. Never the person I will be.
Karen
Ontario Recipes Forum - http://www.obesityhelp.com/group/ontario_recipes/ 
Well said!
It is interesting too, that in many cases the ones that cry out for sympathy and support the most are the first to point and snicker. I am not referring to anyone on this forum as I haven't gotten to know anyone and I am not at all looking to jump into any wars or drama, I'm just sharing an observation.
We, as fat or formerly fat people should be doing all we can to end stereotyping and prejudice of others who are struggling with weight issues whether it be one way or the other, not propagating the stigma and making the subject of weight loss/gain a taboo. Nobody gains from that. Well, weight maybe, but certainly nothing positive.
I'm getting off my soap box now before it A, breaks, or B, I stumble and break something.
It is interesting too, that in many cases the ones that cry out for sympathy and support the most are the first to point and snicker. I am not referring to anyone on this forum as I haven't gotten to know anyone and I am not at all looking to jump into any wars or drama, I'm just sharing an observation.
We, as fat or formerly fat people should be doing all we can to end stereotyping and prejudice of others who are struggling with weight issues whether it be one way or the other, not propagating the stigma and making the subject of weight loss/gain a taboo. Nobody gains from that. Well, weight maybe, but certainly nothing positive.
I'm getting off my soap box now before it A, breaks, or B, I stumble and break something.
Approved for DS in Ontario! Waiting for a date!
I think most of the times anyone who is mean and rude to another's faults are very insecure and project themselves onto the person who is struggling with something.
Trust me I see it all the time with my husband. He is 32 years old and had to loose his right leg! You should hear the remarks people make about his prosthetic! Not curious glances or question but rude, hurtful words. And the answer is they are not happy with themselves.
I sometimes feel helpless for other people, for instance when I see a lady or man who is very very obese and I know how it feels to try to function at my weight, I feel for them...but I NEVER Look down on them. And I sure as hell don't say anything mean or hurtful!
I think if you find yourself judging or thinking badly of someone you need to look inside yourself to find out what is wrong with you!
Off my soap box now!
Juls
Trust me I see it all the time with my husband. He is 32 years old and had to loose his right leg! You should hear the remarks people make about his prosthetic! Not curious glances or question but rude, hurtful words. And the answer is they are not happy with themselves.
I sometimes feel helpless for other people, for instance when I see a lady or man who is very very obese and I know how it feels to try to function at my weight, I feel for them...but I NEVER Look down on them. And I sure as hell don't say anything mean or hurtful!
I think if you find yourself judging or thinking badly of someone you need to look inside yourself to find out what is wrong with you!
Off my soap box now!
Juls
Unfortunate.
I tell my children that they should feel sorry for bullies at school, because they simply act on what they have learned at home.
We, have learned to be ridiculed and judged all our lives. It is a very hard thing to consciously take stock of that behaviour and make a change. BUT.....if we weren't able to do that, we wouldn't be here.....so at least we know its possible.
Good for you, Karen.....for bringing this to light for some. :)
I tell my children that they should feel sorry for bullies at school, because they simply act on what they have learned at home.
We, have learned to be ridiculed and judged all our lives. It is a very hard thing to consciously take stock of that behaviour and make a change. BUT.....if we weren't able to do that, we wouldn't be here.....so at least we know its possible.
Good for you, Karen.....for bringing this to light for some. :)
Jennifer 
(deactivated member)
on 5/29/12 1:09 am, edited 5/29/12 1:37 am - Guelph, Canada
on 5/29/12 1:09 am, edited 5/29/12 1:37 am - Guelph, Canada
I am going to correct you on the bully comment... my oldest son was a bully.. a knock down fight it out bully.. he was NOT taught this at home.... he was in fact hiding a very painful secret and his way of protecting himself was to be the bully so no one ever got close again.. he was expelled from school after school to the point that the minister of education offered a tutor to come to the home for the safety of the other students within the school system... and I will state again he was NOT taught this behavior at home....
he was treated at the age of 11 at a mental health facility in Toronto called youthdale... their solution was to keep him doped up and slap labels on him...
at the age of 15 he came forward and told me (while I was driving on the 401 no less) that he was sexually molested by a family friend from the age of 10 - 12...
so please dont judge the parents of bullies until you have walked 5 steps in their shoes... to be honest.. I dont think narrow minded people could handle the mile that is normally prescribed
I will add my son is now 20 and a fantastic young man...holds a job and lives on his own with a girlfriend.... and is doing GREAT
he was treated at the age of 11 at a mental health facility in Toronto called youthdale... their solution was to keep him doped up and slap labels on him...
at the age of 15 he came forward and told me (while I was driving on the 401 no less) that he was sexually molested by a family friend from the age of 10 - 12...
so please dont judge the parents of bullies until you have walked 5 steps in their shoes... to be honest.. I dont think narrow minded people could handle the mile that is normally prescribed
I will add my son is now 20 and a fantastic young man...holds a job and lives on his own with a girlfriend.... and is doing GREAT
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