Should I have surgery or not?

I am so upset here, today I caved in and ate some turkey. I am due to have surgery next Friday. I told my 18 yr old that I changed my mind about having surgery. He is behind me. We discussed all the complications that could happen. Then I talked to my daughter and her hubby and they are upset with me... they want me to have it.  I am sick with diabetes and high cholesterol and high bp, and on top of it I suffer from arthritis extremely badly. I want to be healthy and have less pain. Yet I am afraid, no terrified of the whole deal. Can anyone here help me? as I write this , Im thinking yes Ill do it, have the surgery. What an idiot I feel like

I think you know what you want to do and only you can answer this. You have to really take a look at yourself and figure out what is best for you. I say that you make a pro and con list. I bought this workbook and it really helped me with the decision making process.

http://www.chapters.indigo.ca/books/the-weight-loss-surgery- workbook/9781572248991-item.html?ikwid=weight+loss+surgery+w orkbook&ikwsec=Home&gcs_requestid=0CKCbjsyu-7cCFcbj5wodXTcAA A

wonderful! Great resource.

Girl... you have your act together. You will do very well after the surgery.

Thanks! It was so great to have this book and it really works you through the process. Thanks for the kind words.

Sorry only you can answer this question and you need to really think about it. Forget what family or friends will tell you. This is your decision. Not one person on this site should try and tell you what to do. Ask yourself are you ready to make the changes that need to be made and if your answer is no than you are not ready. 

I will tell you for me my diabetes is gone, high blood pressure is now normal no more high cholesterol and I can breath again. For all of those reasons I knew I was making the right decision.  

Maybe call the clinic and see if you can get in and talk to the social worker and she could help you work through this

 Make the right decision for you and and no one else

The only one that can really answer this question, is YOU!   Big Hugs!

After such a long wait and all the research we do, all of a sudden the time has finally arrived for us, and we all get

those crazy thoughts and feelings going through our heads.  It's perfectly normal to second guess ourselves, l know l did it a few times and many others have too.  But for myself, l was running out of options, I made of list of pro's and con's l looked at my pictures, I looked in the mirror,  l knew that deep inside me the surgery was something l wanted for ME, and in the past everyone always came before me, so it was hard to do for myself. I also knew without the surgery I was not able to lose weight and keep it off, if l could have l would have done it.  I thought maybe l should try one more time, but after waiting so long and being told carrying this weight around it would only be a matter of time before l encountered some serious health problems, I changed my thinking and fears. I am so thankful l was accepted into the program to have this surgery and all the supportive people in my life, at the clinic and here on this forum.  I can honestly say the 6 weeks l was on optifast was a challenge someday's but l did it over the holidays, and 2 special occasions, without cheating!

 I wish you all the best with your decision, your not alone and l know you will make the best decision for YOU!

Whenever I am uncertain I think about what life is like right now.  I am not happy, I can not do anything I would like to and I feel like I am watching my girls do things instead of doing it with them.  I am tired of the pain and the exhaustion.  These are some of the reasons why I am having surgery.  I am just finishing day 3 of Opti and would love to eat something, but think back to the WHY whenever I have a moment.  The decision you make needs to be right for you.  What will make you happy?  What are you going to be okay with?  

Reenie, you know deep down inside what you should do. It sounds like your beating yourself up because of the opti cheat more than anything. I am hungry on this opti all the time . Only you can decide whats best for you. Can you lose the weight on your own? I cant , thats why i need this surgery. I am on 3 blood pressure pills and on 2 puffers...I support what ever you decide , but i would love to see you at HRRH walking those halls with me next Friday.....And if you chose not to please keep posting and i wish you all the best... Krista...

Krista, I will be there walking with you. Guess I just got a lil stage fright. I know deep down it is what is right. I simply cannot lose the weight on my own, or I would have by now. Well I have of course done the yo yo thing, But Im at my highest weight ever. # bp meds 1 cholesterol med and 2 diabetes meds as well as heavy duty narcotics for the arthritic pain I am in almost constantly. Even the anestieoligist said to me WOW THATS A TRUCKLOAD OF PAINKILLERS! We will be sure to give you extra as Dr. Sohi generally only gives 5-10 mg of morphine, and that wont even phase you. I want to be free of all of these meds before my liver gives out. You are right I am feeling guilty, and I feel like Ive let all of you down. Especially those of you who have to take the opti for more than 2 weeks. Im such a crybaby. Only 4 more days to go WITHOUT CHEATING ... I fear that the Dr will just close me up without doing the surgery, honestly I dont know why I beat myself up so much. Hugs to you Krista, Ill be seeing you soon

1. It is total nonsense that a single cheating on opti is somehow detectable by a surgeon. I don't know why nurses and dieticians tell this crap to people. It's just a scary tactics. You liver will still stay very fatty even months AFTER surgery. Yes, liver becomes a bit more manageable with weight/fat loss - but NOT from Opti. there is nothing special in opti for "shrinking" liver. Opti is nutritionally balanced and it is safe to use. Hence it is easy to put majority of patents on identical diet - cheaper on the health system than to tailor individual diet for each patient. There were dozens of patients who had allergy, intolerances, and all old-timers. who never did opti diet. We (I never did opti) had to lose weight doing low calorie diet - I lost some 14 pounds preop eating turkey and other stuff. It doesn't derail your success.

2. failing (giving in to the food) once doesn't mean you'll fail the surgery. You are a food addict and if you think your addiction is over - sorry, it's with you for life. You have to learn to cope with you addiction, because food will call your name for the rest of your life. Forgiving yourself and learning to move on, is the best ways to do it. "All or nothing" thinking is one of the reason people struggle and fail. success is not in not falling, but in getting up and keeping moving.

3. you have diabetes and you still have doubts? you must be the first diabetic in your family? Three out of four of my grandparents died from this disease before age of 60, and their deaths were not easy ones - blindness, amputations, dialysis...  Are you already on insulin? I was put on insulin at age of 35. There was no doubt about WLS for me. It is a question of life and death for diabetics. I know it first hand. You know it too. stop deluding yourself that you can live with it. no, you can't, because diabetes kills.

Hope I scared you enough to stop crying and start preparing for your surgery. Good luck!