a dilemma - advice needed, please
So this is a combination WOW and dilemma.
Remember when i mentioned how Tony at my gym was so complimentary about how Iooked a week or so ago? Well, he must have mentioned it to someone else, because now they want to do a "featured member" story in the club newsletter on me and my weight loss. I'm VERY flattered, but am torn about what to mention (if anything) about my surgery. It's such an odd instance and I don't want to minimize the incredibly hard work that's gone into this loss by having people focus on the surgery... especially since I don't really have a bypass, have no malabsorption or dumping, etc... And in a short article, i don't want the bulk of it being the description of what REALLY happened (haha).
Would it be inherently dishonest/unethical to not mention it? or to mention it only in passing?
I'm not at all ashamed that I had it, just want to represent truthfully and in the best interests of the readers. After all, the goal is to inspire people to exercise, lose weight, and take care of their health.
What would YOU do?
karen
Remember when i mentioned how Tony at my gym was so complimentary about how Iooked a week or so ago? Well, he must have mentioned it to someone else, because now they want to do a "featured member" story in the club newsletter on me and my weight loss. I'm VERY flattered, but am torn about what to mention (if anything) about my surgery. It's such an odd instance and I don't want to minimize the incredibly hard work that's gone into this loss by having people focus on the surgery... especially since I don't really have a bypass, have no malabsorption or dumping, etc... And in a short article, i don't want the bulk of it being the description of what REALLY happened (haha).
Would it be inherently dishonest/unethical to not mention it? or to mention it only in passing?
I'm not at all ashamed that I had it, just want to represent truthfully and in the best interests of the readers. After all, the goal is to inspire people to exercise, lose weight, and take care of their health.
What would YOU do?
karen
Karen,
That is an AWESOME WOW!! If this was me, I would be honest. Tell them about your surgery, but also talk about all the HARD WORK you have had to do. Many people, as you know, think that WLS is the easy way out. We know better!! This is far from easy. This is your opportunity to tell more people about your experience without just saying it was "diet and exercise" only.
You are a true inspiration to me! This would be a great forum for you to share your journey with others. I find that it is very therapeutic for me when people ask me questions about WLS or tell me that they want my help. I feel like I am paying it forward. Or at the very least giving Dr. P more patients in the future! LOL!!
YOU ROCK!!
Beth
That is an AWESOME WOW!! If this was me, I would be honest. Tell them about your surgery, but also talk about all the HARD WORK you have had to do. Many people, as you know, think that WLS is the easy way out. We know better!! This is far from easy. This is your opportunity to tell more people about your experience without just saying it was "diet and exercise" only.
You are a true inspiration to me! This would be a great forum for you to share your journey with others. I find that it is very therapeutic for me when people ask me questions about WLS or tell me that they want my help. I feel like I am paying it forward. Or at the very least giving Dr. P more patients in the future! LOL!!
YOU ROCK!!
Beth
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I actually think that your full story is of your determination, not focused on the surgery. Since you are in conflict to begin with, if you are not honest, I think you will feel like you have stolen the glory, even though you will not have stolen anything. You made a decision to better yourself and you have. You intended to have additional help that didn't quite turn out to be what you expected, but that didn't stop you. The result, small portions, eating right and hard work and you have done an amazing job!
That's my 2 cents!
Maura
no regrets
That's my 2 cents!
Maura
no regrets
Maura
I think u should mention the surgery even if u dont go into detail, about the mal absorption issue. It is dishonest not to mention it and have others think that u lost all that weight by just going to the gym.
A local gym put someones picture in the newspaper, "look how much weight she lost" they didn't mention the fact of WLS and plastics and I just thought it was misleading to people that would see this advertisement
Susan
A local gym put someones picture in the newspaper, "look how much weight she lost" they didn't mention the fact of WLS and plastics and I just thought it was misleading to people that would see this advertisement
Susan
Wow wow wow Karen! FABULOUS! I can TOTALLY understand your dilemma though.
What about something like "I started on a quest to better myself and my health. That process began with a partial gastric bypass. However, it is my daily dedication to exercise and healthy eating that has enabled me to continue down the road of a healthy lifestyle. My results were not typical nor expected based on the surgery itself due to the complex nature of my case. I credit my current successes to the following routines" or something to that nature...
And of course...CONGRATS again!!!
I like that Tony more and more every minute you talk about him. First he recognizes such a fantastic woman and her fantastic successing...and now he's spreading the word. Good for him!
What about something like "I started on a quest to better myself and my health. That process began with a partial gastric bypass. However, it is my daily dedication to exercise and healthy eating that has enabled me to continue down the road of a healthy lifestyle. My results were not typical nor expected based on the surgery itself due to the complex nature of my case. I credit my current successes to the following routines" or something to that nature...
And of course...CONGRATS again!!!
I like that Tony more and more every minute you talk about him. First he recognizes such a fantastic woman and her fantastic successing...and now he's spreading the word. Good for him!
Instead of complaining that the rosebush has thorns, be happy that the thorn bush has roses. 
Karen you asked " What would I do?" So, I will tell you. It does not mean it is what you should do, or that I would not support any decision you made. I got your back regardless.
I would tell them. You know me, I am an open book big mouth about my surgery. I always see things like this as a opportunity to educate people. So if it were me, I would tell them the story, and then tell them what YOU HAVE TO DO NOW, even with the surgery to be successful. People hear WLS and they think oh easy peasy. It isnt. They dont always realize, how much stress and attention goes into every choice you make, and how hard in the gym we all work. ( well at least some of us LOL) I understands your thoughts on it.
Maybe you could tell them you are honored, and that you wanted to give them that one more piece of information and if they still want to do the story go for it, There aint no shame in this game.....you worked for every pound
I would tell them. You know me, I am an open book big mouth about my surgery. I always see things like this as a opportunity to educate people. So if it were me, I would tell them the story, and then tell them what YOU HAVE TO DO NOW, even with the surgery to be successful. People hear WLS and they think oh easy peasy. It isnt. They dont always realize, how much stress and attention goes into every choice you make, and how hard in the gym we all work. ( well at least some of us LOL) I understands your thoughts on it.
Maybe you could tell them you are honored, and that you wanted to give them that one more piece of information and if they still want to do the story go for it, There aint no shame in this game.....you worked for every pound
Hi Karen - this must have really bothered you because you're normally not an indecisive one on this board, but I do agree with the others that you should talk about the WLS to some extent - I think it's wonderful to educate people on what we've gone through and how we continue to go through it on a daily basis - so many out there still look at it as a quick fix, and if someone at the gym reads your article and knows of someone who is on the fence about WLS but really needs it that might just be the vote of confidence they need.
The people at the gym obviously know how hard you work - they see you there all the time - so I say go for it - it's a fabulous compliment to your hard work and dedication.
Good luck and congratulations!!
The people at the gym obviously know how hard you work - they see you there all the time - so I say go for it - it's a fabulous compliment to your hard work and dedication.
Good luck and congratulations!!
'One shoe can change your life'...Cinderella
R K.
on 4/28/10 10:24 pm
on 4/28/10 10:24 pm
IMHO Not telling them would taint the whole story. It kind of reminds me of back when I owned my gym. It was a big steroid time in the industry and hiding it made it worse. Some guys did juice up but you don`t juice up and grow muscles. It still requires hard work and dedication.
I fear that although WLS is legal people believe you get it and suddenly you`re on the cover of Shape magazine when in fact it still requires hard work and dedication.
Great opportunity to showcase the dedication and hard work you`ve put in and also educate about WLS.
I have to say though I find the statement that you didn`t really have bypass, no dumping or malabsorbtion interesting.
I fear that although WLS is legal people believe you get it and suddenly you`re on the cover of Shape magazine when in fact it still requires hard work and dedication.
Great opportunity to showcase the dedication and hard work you`ve put in and also educate about WLS.
I have to say though I find the statement that you didn`t really have bypass, no dumping or malabsorbtion interesting.
*
"If I only had three words of advice, they would be, Tell the Truth. If got three more words, I'd add, all the time."
— Randy Pausch
"If I only had three words of advice, they would be, Tell the Truth. If got three more words, I'd add, all the time."
— Randy Pausch
Well, as I mentioned in my surgiversary posting, I didn't "really" end up bypassed. Dr. P started to do the bypass, dissected my stomach, then found lesions in my abdomen. Rather than continuing with the bypass, she reconnected the stomach, creating a "demi-pouch" that she said woudl stretch out REALLY easily, and that was it. So I can't dump, have no malabsorption, and have no mechanical restriction keeping my pouch small. At this point in time, I'm not even sure how small it is, or whether it's expanded back out to its "normal" (pre-surg) size. Now that I've been cleared by the oncologists, she's willing to go back in and complete the bypass should I ever need it... but at this point it's just an option left on the table.
That complexity is why I was going back and forth on whether to mention the surgery or not.
It's CERTAINLY not that I'm ashamed of it - I just don't want to give people the wrong idea in either direction.
Karen
That complexity is why I was going back and forth on whether to mention the surgery or not.
It's CERTAINLY not that I'm ashamed of it - I just don't want to give people the wrong idea in either direction.
Karen
Karen,
WOW! Congratulations. What an honor. If it were me, I'd feel dishonest if I didn't share the information about my surgery, but that's just me. You have worked extremely hard to get where you are, and I would focus on that. Focus on the healthy behavior changes you've made. You are a true inspiration! CONGRATS on all of your hard work and determination!
Debbie
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