Self Regulation... Can it be? Thank you VSG.... (LONG)

Last night I was in my "Special Needs Child in the Community" class and we were discussing "Self Regulation." This is a skill/ability we "should" all have but don't always. As the Early Interventionist spoke she explained how this related to children with autism, learning disabilities and sensory integration disorder. She then went on to explain that there were perfectly normal children who for one reason or another don't have the skill set to self regulate. They can not sit still while you read a story, cant hold a pencil with out fidgeting and dropping it, can not communicate effectivly with their peers as they are all over the place even with much effort to remain still. We spoke about how given the right tools to channel their energy, gain focus and find their center of gravity they will slowly learn to self regulate for periods of time. Furthermore the children who do not have an actual developmental disability will acquire self regulation permanently as it will become their new norm and the symptoms will disappear. I enjoyed the presentation but my mind went right to weight loss.
I am not a binge eater, I do not find massive joy in food, I do not sit around dreaming of my next meal.... nor did I before the VSG. I didn't rely on food for friendship or emotional support.
I, my friends... just don't self regulate... well anything. I take on 4 more projects than I can handle and then run in circles trying to finish them. I go dancing and have 2 more drinks than I should and poor Jimbo has to carry my ass home. I let the laundry pile up... then spend a whole weekend doing it. I spend more money than I should... on things I don't need without much thought... because I can. I "ATE" not eat... but ATE when I wanted to ... what I wanted to... without thought. I didn't obsess and need tons of food... I just never ever thought about what it was I was actually eating, how it affected my body or health, the carb/protein/calorie count... none of it. I went all day without eating cause I was busy... I ate a huge dinner cause I was hungry... there was not a lot of thought going into the process. I was not thinking out my actions and regulating them like a normal person would. Its just now how I operate as a whole. I'm more of a do-er... less of a planning kinda thinker girl... I do... and then I think... and then I say.. "Oh **** really Jen, really that was your choice"
It's my nature I suppose...
I can now say the not only the VSG.... but the process of the VSG has made me a self regulator ... well as for the food part of my life is concerned. I was given the tools just like the disabled child was given a textured surface to sit on and touch in order to hold focus for story time. I was given meetings with a nutritionist... I learned how my body works, how foods affect me and how to best care for myself. I was invited, welcomed and included in support group meetings that let me see others just like myself, struggling and winning. I met doctors there, who supported me, I was given info every step of the way, not just about food but about life. I learned about the exercise I needed and the foods my new body would need. The list goes on and on...I met a wonderful therapist who helped me see how my life had affected me, how I became who I am and how I had to power to now become who ever I wanted to be. And lastly... a much needed tool, my sleeve. The restriction I so desperately needed was given to me.
My tool box is full, I have been given every thing I need (so far) and now... thoughtlessly, effortlessly... I self regulate. I don't think about it, I don't cry about it. I don't worry about it... And at the same time... I don't mindlessly make choices that keep me from being where I want and need to be. Just like the little children who struggle to hold focus in class because they cant control their bodies and just go where the wind blows them... given the right people in my life who see what I need... and care enough to help... I was given the tools to help me self regulate and function just like every other"typically developed" person. It has become second nature. I have learned in this process that I have the power and need to take the responsibility to self regulate. Its what most people naturally do... it took a little work but now I control food and my body... its not just running wild like a wild turkey in November... well I guess by November... the turkey would be doing less running but you know what I mean. It just never occurred to me that people were so intune with their bodies that they just naturally stopped when no longer physically hungry, that they thought, hum I had a donut this morning so I should stick with a light lunch... but the more I talk to my thin friends... this is why they are thin...a little thought and planning goes a long way... and now... I have the tools to be one of the regular guys...
Just a lil nugget from the mind of Jen... I am now gonna enjoy the vicoden and hope this ear pain stops before I'm forced to shoot myself in the face...
If you read all this... I love you... If not... I totally understand....
Hugs, kisses and self control....
Jen


This is my thinking face... look smart yet??? Im working on it...

Do  you get how HUGE....that is?  This is a process.....learning to navigate it....is key to success!   I'm glad you are navigating so well.........now to work on "self regulating"...cupcakes!  lol!   You are full of surprises........I'm so proud....and happy for you.
BTW........your "thinking" face.....looks very much like your...."high on vicodin"  face........Hmmm?  Love ya babe! 

 Ummm cupcakes....

I was the opposite and I STILL think about my next meal. lol. I've been a big girl all my life and I know nothing different. I also have an eating disorder. I havent binged postop but I do think about binging especially when Im bored... go figure.
For me... preop even at my best... The mental aspect of weightloss kicked my ass and I ended up sabotaging myself because I let the fear of failure and becoming something Id never been, get the best of me.
Now, with my tool having my back I find I am more and more self regulating myself. Im not 100% on the ball but this a learning process and 6 months of being Sleeved isnt going to change 25 years of eating whatever I wanted as much as I wanted.
I totally get your post and I'm glad you posted.
Keep killing it girly
xo
Kiki

You are awesome!  Its great having seen you come so far.  I know I still have a lot of work to do and you have been providing so much moral support and are setting such a good example (except maybe the cupcakes...and the alcohol...but for the most part your food examples are good) that I know if I ever am able to get VSG that I will make it cause you will be there to help me. 

 
Great post....great term....

Now that you put a name/phrase/term to it..... I gotta think about it......

It's more defined than "Self Control"


But after reading this thread.... I have a vision of you not showing any "Self Regulation"........

- Drunk and on Vicodin with Cupcake Frosting on your face, shopping bags on your arm and Jimbo carrying you home cause your in a Alcohol, Vicodin Sugar Carb Coma !!!

Damn.... why does that sound like good thing !!!! (all except the Jimbo part....!)

frisco

Love it... sounds like a good time... haha... depending on just how many pairs of uggs have been shoved into those shopping bags

HEY!........I'm ALWAYS a good addition to a night out!  BTW.........the following represents a typical night out with Jen............in smiley icons!  ha ha ha ha !!!..............                

Judging by those smiley icons, your nights out together sound FUN!

Thank you for sharing this.

I am planning to help my daughter get the sleeve too.
I'm going to share this post with her.

I really want this for my daughter. (the tool part, not the part with the vicoden, Jimbo or Frisco) :-)

Thanks again,
Donna