I am an asshole

Happy, I like your posts, you are helpful. but on this thread I think you may have missed the sarcasm Big Red was getting at about being an asshole. I can't speak for her but I can tell you when I see 2-3 three new posts back to back and each are covering the exact same topic I know people coming to these boards for help aren't doing any research, damn there not even hardly changing the title of their post from the one previous to that one. that ****** me off and tells me the second and third posters, really don't care, and hear comes my asshole, yet I refrain. I'd like to give them a big shake and ask them WTF, McFly, wake up and pay attnetion...Theres a lot of other questions people ask that they don't do any research on first. like the 3 week stall. The drama that people go through when they hit a three week stall and then come to these boards and its chicken little, the end of the world because the sky is falling. I've been on a three week stall 3 days before three weeks and for the last 14 days and I gained 6 pounds, SO WHAT! but I did my research, I know its normal, and this too shall pass. Still, people come on here without doing any checking, or reading even the last 2-3 pages of current posts and just ask the same question over and over, yea they need to be throttled and that brings out the asshole in me.

Ok Texas,

I get that there are a bajillion posts on the 3 week stall and that there is a tendency for redundant postings.  But I would respectfully point out that many of these types of posts are made by people new (or relatively) new to the forum.  They consequently would not be aware that it is a common topic.  And don't get me started on the search feature.  If you think it is obvious that it evens exists due to the placement in small script and crowded out by all the other garbage on the site I would disagree.  Heck, with this new format it took me a while to even locate the darn link, so imagine if you are new to the site how easy it would be to overlook it or not even realize that it would sift through topics.  Even then, if a search doesn't hit on the right keywords it is possible to miss posts.  

My next point is one that is very, very easy for teachers to relate to... but not as easy for my non-teaching brethren.  When a person throws up a post on a redundant topic please try to empathize that it is NOT redundant for that poster, only the experienced poster.  The poster is genuinely reaching out seeking information, strategies, motivation, or whatever.  That is the very essence of what a forum like this is for. You mention your irritation with a poster not researching... well my friend, that is exactly what a poster is doing when they put up a topic such as a stall.   Imagine if in my 5th grade classroom I started being an a-hole to my students because for the MILLIONTH time I heard the question about using zeroes as a place value holder in the standard multiplication algorithm.  I think we can all agree that indeed I would be an a-hole and shouldn't even be in the teaching profession if I only served up a dose of "tough love" instead of addressing the educational need of the student(s), belittling them for their "stupidity" or perhaps for their insensitivity for not knowing the material and forcing me to address the question.  

We together forma  group of posters with a wide swath of experience and can all contribute positively to others.  Posters who choose to bag on others for their own selfish reasons certainly does not embody the spirit of what a forum is about.  Now with that said, I think the OP has some issues that indeed do need some empathy and I sincerely hope that she is able to find a path that leads her to a healthy physical and emotional lifestyle.  I wish the same for you Texas.

forums on the internet are a dime a dozen. if anyone has ever been on a forum and read the the "instructions" most forums require, its a stated part of being a member that you need to research your topic before you post. because that rule isn't stated on this board doesn't mean its not a relevant tactic.I agree with you the search function on here is poor, but its still there and its still functional.

Its hard to equate the people here to the mentality of a 5th grader trying to learn mathematic equations. people on this board are either considering or in some stage of undertaking a major life altering surgery, they have to go through a rigorous screening process including a psychiatric eval for many of them. Also, a big thing you may have missed is that I said I get frustrated with people, that doesn't mean that I make rude replies or am mean. I think that is what maturity is about. On this post, which really has nothing to do with any specific surgery or questions about complications, but more of a general rant, I expressed how I felt. I'm not wrong for that, I haven't been disrespectful to anyone. That does not decrease a low tolerance for stupidity from anyone in any situation at any time. I don't tolerate or suffer fools. It also goes straight to the point I was making of personal responsibility. If you can't read the first post on the board and then post an almost exactly worded post, what does that say about you (no, not you happy teacher).

plus, posts on here are devoid of emotion so misunderstandings are sure to arise just because tones can't be put into words. I admit it I am an asshole, but I haven't been an asshole to anyone here, yet, but I have my eye on someone now...(again not you Happy).

Did you read my very first post on this thread? I do understand this a great resource for anyone who is serious about using it as a resource.

Hey again Texas,

It was not my intent to point a finger and accuse you of being mean or even inappropriate.  Really my response is focused on accepting that newer folks have a learning curve and need support and time to figure this all out.  We were all there once.  Some of us are much more computer savvy than others as well.  For an experienced user I agree the idea of a search button is more likely expected and sought, but those with less experience may not even realize it is there.  I guess the way I deal with the redundant posts is to simply jump in the pool when I feel like it, otherwise I feel like somebody else may be in the mood to jump in when I do not feel up to it.  Take what you can use and lesve the rest, help out when you can.  Happy New Year :)

Oh, I am not a gun person... what does CHL mean?

Happy,

seriously, were good, I didn't take offense to anything you said at all. I post on threads when I feel I can make a contribution to the discussion. ones on topic, I answer honestly and try to be helpful if I can relate. Hopefully I've been helpful so far. I just ignore a lot of posts where the urge for sarcasm or smart ass remarks come to mind. This is one of the best and most helpful boards I've ever come across and that's due to the effort put into it by people like you and Elina, Frisco, and so many others.

CHL is concealed handgun license.

An armed society is a polite society.

Thank you for clarifying the CHL thing.  I am afraid we are not in agreement about guns though ;)

I'd also point out if you are this frustrated a little over a month out doesn't bode well for this board to serve you over your journey.  But then again i think, it takes a newbie to be a know, it all because as time goes by a most of us realize there are levels to what we know, don't know, and thought we had sorted. There is a reason it's called a journey and everyone travels differently.

oh you again!

so this journey has been a nice smooth xanax trip for you the whole time and you've never been irritated, bothered, annoyed by anything you've read, its all A-Ok by you? well I know that's a lie, your seriously losing it on your comments to me on this thread about nothing. I can't believe you equated my comments of being a wife beater, thanks alot!

Ok, so I think you're funny and all that jazz, and I like women who say things for what they are and don't sugar coat things in an effort to appear feminine and nurturing. However, being mean for the sake of being mean is not the same thing. I don't find that in most of the posts I've seen from you, but in all fairness you must admit that at times you've been sarcastic without any advice/truth/helpfulness behind it. I don't normally get involved in all this stupid bickering, but this is a support site. I've found great strength here post-op from so many strong, caring and helpful men and women. I would hate for it to become a place where I had to be nervous to post for fear someone would decide to get their kicks knocking me down. Come on, we were all fat at one point, haven't we all experienced enough degradation in real life?

In other words, I want someone to tell me to knock it the hell off if I'm being stupid, but don't call me stupid for the fun of it. Does that make sense? 

I think the majority of the people on this forum come here for advice.  This is supposed to be a life changing experience for all of us and most of us need some help.  Some make stupid choices, I agree, but alot of us really need guidance and support.  

I understand if you don't want to be some ones "mommy", and you shouldnt be, that doesnt really accomplish anything, but realistically, people respond better to kind words rather than harsh or mean ones.  I just don't understand the need to be an "asshole", all that does is irritate people and why would you want that? 

I am here to learn from others and their experiences, not to see who can win the ******g contest.  If you want to be mean, that is your choice, but just remember, people will probably block you and what good is that?  I think being truthful, and honest is the way to go... and not to sugarcoat, but there is no need to be a mean about it.

Just my 2 cents worth.  :)

Everyone have a great day!