NOTE TO SELF: DON'T KID YOURSELF

Yeeesssss ... I have been thinking about this a lot lately and my previous post should have been a reminder of just that!

We all know this WL journey is hard ... even for those who have raced to goal where it appears they didn't give it a second thought ... people like Elina, Frisco, Devon (kairk), Tom (jub jub), etc... you know who you are...

THIS post is really for ME and for anyone else who feels they need a reality check ...

Do I want success?  Yes

Do I want to get back to goal?  Hell Yes

Do I deserve to eat "wanna-be" VSG friendly "snacks" & still get to goal quick???  Ahem ... no.  A BIG FAT NO AT THAT.

I remember quite vividly when I ate that cupcake earlier this year ... the kiss of death that started this regain ... I remember looking in the mirror & liking what I saw ... I justified it left & right & told myself I looked pretty darn good.  In fact, I told myself I might even look all kinds of cute eating one too ... humph!!!

No ... cupcakes are not my friend.  Why?  Because the want to cling to me like white on rice.  As cute as the are ... and they come in all colors, flavors & sizes ... they are just there to torment me & to make me believe that I can have my cake & eat it too.  This means if I want cupcakes around, the cupcakes need to be in the shape of my air freshener (which BTW is not the cupcake scent, that would just be torture), my cosmetic train case, my necklace, & my keychain ...

Some things are pretty to look at but doesn't mean I need to obsess over them (like wanting to look like 35 year old Catherine Zeta-Jones)   

Bottom line is ... damn it all to heck & back ...  This takes work.  Nothing in life worth while comes free.  If I wanna look & feel a certain way then it's not going to happen while looking all kinds of cute, eating a damn cupcake!!!!  

Girl, I think you need to get rid of all the reminders of cupcakes for a while. They might be cute but maybe they are tormenting you more than you think. Even little Bella can go without cupcakes!!

You deserve to be good to yourself and you deserve to be successful. And as always, learn to love yourself my friend. I need to seeeee you soon.

OK, OK my friend let me clarify ... I haven't had a cupcake in a loooong time BUT I mentioned the cupcake just to represent any type of food obsession

Gurl, I have some free time this weekend.  When are we gonna meet up???  I feel a quivering lip comin' on ova here!!!

xoxo

 

You are right. This journey does take work. It is harder for some than for others. For me, WL was easy. I had rules. I stuck to them. The weight came off.

Maintaining my weight has proven to be much more difficult. I have had to deal with old behaviors cropping up, core beliefs about food coming to the surface (beliefs I didn't even know I had), learning how I used food to cope with emotional issues, and my personal food culture just to name a few of the biggies.

I believe that I must be ever vigilant to be successful. That does not mean that I will never again eat X, but it does mean that I need to be aware that eating X comes with a price and must be a weighed out choice.

I think in the end it boils down to what is the price we are willing to pay for an indulgence. Some find it worth the price to have a glass of wine or ****tail. Others may want some chocolate or an ice cream, or heaven forbid in my case, a chewy gooey cookie.

For you and me, my friend, there are probably things we should just not eat. It's simply easier that way. I'm learning to be okay with that. The best thing I have done for myself lately was my self imposed baked good hiatus. My 30 days is long up and I have gotten used to not eating those types of foods and they don't call to me as they did when I would allow myself a bit here and there. Maybe an abstention from some of your trigger foods for 30 days might work well for you, too.

That sounds like a good idea. For me to give up my main trigger foods to see if that helps. I need to mix things up for sure. Thank you!

What's eating at you? It's not food. It's something else.

You've been through hell this year. Not an excuse, but **** - life happens. You are awesome.

You totally got this.

I guess a lot of personal stuff but its alway been a lot more tolerable to turn to something like food, you know?
I guess I feel like posting will help keep me accountable but I'm not really sure it's always working for me.
I'm just trying to get my head screwed on right. Just when I think I've had it down... It's always something I guess!

Ah, you sweet thing. I get what you're saying. If you ever want to vent, PM me. I know you've got lots of folks to lean on, but I'm really good at cussing and commiserating. I'm also good at understanding that it's just today. Tomorrow may be different.

Life will always be there to live. Do your best right now--as it happens. Sometimes posting it does help because it gets the head **** out of your brain, which can sometimes make the problems not seem to damn big. Sometimes though, it's just hard.  

Keep on plugging away at it because really, what the **** else are you going to do?

*hugs*

I really needed your reply today, I really did and it gave me a little swift kick in the butt but also made me chuckle right after. 

What the **** else am I gonna do is right!!!!

I like how the first things you typed talk about WANTS...I always tell myself,  my friends anyone who will listen...when push comes to show what do you WANT.

Do I always WANT to be at goal MORE then a "cupcake" well no BUT what I WANT is goal and I will NOT accept anything less!!