getting back on the horse - I've fallen and fear I can't get up

Laurie S.
on 5/9/18 1:18 pm

Long time member, been gone too long.

Short version - had surgery in 2010, lost 160+, got to onederland. Gained a little back via infertility treatments, still 130# down from highest (holding around 230-240) from 361. Baby (finally!) in 2015 - gained to 275 while pg, lost back down to where I am now.

FF to now - son is 3, eating is out of control - restriction is still in full effect - have friends pressuring to do beach body - tried, but my knee is crap.

I need a reset. Who out there has fallen off the wagon, burned the wagon, toasted marshmallows on the remains of the wagon and then realized that you need the freakin' wagon? Help would be appreciated.


Laurie =)
my blog:
HW - 361/SW - 338/GW - ONEderland somewhere......
(loss reflects 23# loss pre-op)

on 5/9/18 4:22 pm

OK- Your "who" would be me. Life happens, choices are made--behaviors sprout out of those choices. Mine were not good ---Maintained goal for approx. 1 1/2 yrs, then went bat**** crazy and regained 125#s. It took a mere year and a half to do that. Long story short- came to my senses last May, 2017, and did the following:

Made appointments immediately with health care workers (I was putting off seeing until I got my act together). And when I went in was ruthlessly honest about what I had been doing, took responsibility for the stupidity, and resolved to :

Turn mental intentions into true change of behavior. First, I detoxed off the sugar and simple carbs--all slider foods. Until I did that, it was impossible for me to stay on the wagon, as you put it. This took a full two weeks for me.

If you've been on the boards, you know the dance...hydration, protein forward, vitamins .logging and food journaling, .etc, etc..etc

Most importantly, for me, has been in maintaning perseverance. This task of loosing a great deal of regain is in understanding that it cannot be done Willy-nilly- On some days and then off again won't cut it. Progress is realized in DAILY EFFORT OVER TIME.

It has taken me a slap year, 53 weeks now and I have lost 115 of the 125 regained pounds. The sleeve isn't will work if you choose to do the work.

Courage to you, girl. You can do this! -Bonnie

  goal!!! August 20, 2013   age: 59  High weight: 345 (June, 2011)  Consult weight: 293 (June, 2012)  Pre-Op: 253 (Nov., 2012) Surgery weight: 235 (Dec. 12, 2012) Current weight: 145

 TOTAL POUNDS LOST- 200 (110 pounds lost before surgery, 90 pounds lost Post Op.diabetes in remission-blood pressure normal-cholesterol and triglyceride levels normal!  BMI from 55.6  supermorbidly obese to 23.6  normal!!!!  



on 5/9/18 8:16 pm
RNY on 07/23/14

Love the visual.... you can do this.

Right now the food is more important than the exercise, so don't stress it.

Protein forward, preferably dense protein... no drinking with meals and for ½ hour after. Personally I always liked to keep my protein at 100g at least. That sounds like a lot but there is 4 calories per gram of protein so that's 400 calories of your day, granted there are fats in there too but it's doable. I drank a protein drink every day during weight loss as well... that may or may not work for you.

Good Luck!

Cynthia 5'11" RNY 7/23/2014

Maintaining a 220lb Weight Loss
Plastic Surgery Dr. Joseph Michaels - LBL and Hernia Repair 2/29/16, Arm Lift, BL, 5/2/16, Leg Lift 7/25/16

Need to get back to Basics? The Five Day Meat Test



Amy R.
on 5/9/18 9:44 pm

I love the two answers you've already gotten. Many of us have been where you are, recovered our senses, and re-lost the weight. You can do it and there's no doubt about that.

As mentioned, it has to be an everyday change if you want to re-lose any amount. There is a very smart lady named Hala on the boards here. When someone mentions starting over the next day, she says "Next MEAL, not next day"). Those five words have helped me so much.

After losing two big regains I'm convinced that that philosophy of Hala's has kept me from a third. I'll still be up and down 10 or 15 pounds at bad times, but it comes right off when I just do the next right thing. Or I guess in this case - eat the next right meal.

Good luck, you can do it. Fall down seven times get up eight.

Kristi T.
on 5/10/18 9:03 am - MT
VSG on 02/09/16

I absolutely love that, "Next Meal, not next day" I am going to put that on my fridge! Thank you Hala and Amy R.!!

Kristi T.
on 5/10/18 9:04 am - MT
VSG on 02/09/16

Welcome back Laurie, you can do this!

Kathy S.
on 5/10/18 10:27 am - InTheBurbs, XX
RNY on 08/29/04 with

Welcome Back To OH

You have already taken the hardest step by saying enough is enough and now I want to get back on track. I maintained 118-125 for over 10 years after losing 200 pounds. Due to a personal tragedy I gained and hit the 190 mark a year ago. After several starts it finally clicked and I am back to goal losing 70 pounds of regain. Here are some steps that helped me and I hope they will help you too! You may have several starts and stops but don't give up, don't beat yourself up. IT WILL CLICK!!! Our tool works if we work the tool and get back to the basics.


Remember when we were preparing for surgery? How many meetings, classes and such did we attend? We were told the more prepared we were the better our chances were for success. And they were right. Go through the house, car and work place and get rid of trigger foods. Stock up on foods that will keep you on track. I removed every bad carb/sugar temptation and replaced it with lots of protein, veggies, grains and fruits.


Get back to journaling. This will help you identify when you feel like eating, stress factors and any triggers in your life. Once you identify these factors, this will help you put tools in place to keep you from eating. It became clear I was not taking time for me anymore. I worked my day job and then spent the rest of my time caring for my husband. It was easy to reach for fast, prepackaged food. Since I purged my home I have to eat clean as there are no other options LOL

Use a tool to track you're eating and exercise like Getting Started with Health Tracker. Once I started to track ever bite and drink it became clear why I had gained.


Make a list of goals for yourself. Make them realistic and small. Some of mine were move more, purge all junk from my home, eat more protein. If you didn't make a Weight Loss Surgery bucket list when you first had surgery do it now. GREAT reminder of all the things you can enjoy in life after losing weight.


In general, a long term post-weight loss surgery eating plan includes foods that are high in protein, and low in fat?, calories, and sugar. Important, vitamins and minerals are provided as supplements. (if you had a different surgery adjust this to your food plan).


Water is our Best Friend. I have to say I never went back to pop or any bad drinks, however I was drinking tea like crazy. What is wrong with drinking tea? I was either using sugar or 3 equals and 3 sweet n lows per 32 ounce glass. I found once I started carrying one of the metal bottles of water to keep it cold I drank water all day.


I can't say enough about how key this was for me. The reason I kept my weight off for almost 10 years was no matter what, I kept moving. If I could not go to the gym I would walk. Grab a cart and walk all the isles at your local box store. I loved Zumba, bootcamp workouts, lifting weights. When I stopped, the weight started coming back. So for me I am starting slow to avoid injury by walking and using some of the workouts on my Demand TV. Find something you love to do and it won't feel like a pain in the *** to do daily.


If it's an option "run" don't walk to a support group. Come here on OH daily for support and participate in one of the food threads. It helps you be accountable and also great ideas for food prep.

Keep me posted on how you are doing.

HW:330 - GW:150 - MW:118-125

RW:190 - CW:130

H.A.L.A B.
on 5/10/18 10:57 am

Hugs. I've been there - dealing with regain. Before WLS - I would start my new diet "Tomorrow, or Next Monday, or On the 1st of the month". Post op - while in maintenance- I start as soon I find my dedication to lose regain.

Gain does not happen overnight. Loss will not happen overnight.

Also - when I start new eating program- to lose some of regain - I almost always have to decarb first. I gained weight when my eating changed from protein forward to carby foods. Somehow my volume restrictions is very minimal when I eat carbs. Even the "so called" -healthy carbs like fruits or dairy or complex carbs.

When I am decarbing I need to avoid carbs, to break the cycle. First couple of weeks as I am decarbing - I don't limit amount of dense proteins beyond what my pouch can handle. I try to not overeat, but I eat as much as my pouch can handle. I try to concentrate on dense proteins - and avoid sauces. But I don't avoid natural fats like butter, avocado, olives.

Having many proteins choices - like chicken, fish, pork and beef- prevent my eating boredom. Adding low starch veggies - like cucumbers, olives, pickles (NSA - no sugar added) etc. I try tot limit things like mayo (to make chicken or egg salad) - because that may create more "slider type food".

Hunger is not pleasant - but it is not an emergency, and often what feels like hunger - may be thirst, or head hunger- cravings.

Hala. RNY 5/14/2008; Happy At Goal =HAG

"I can eat or do anything I want to - as long as I am willing to deal with the consequences"

"Failure is not falling down, It is not getting up once you fell... So pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again...."

B. Jones
on 5/11/18 3:54 pm

I might be your Doppleganger ;)

I had my VSG back in 03/09, lost 310 lbs (High of 550) was around 240-250 for a few years. The weight slowly creeped back on (no biggie right) but I've had 10 more operations since then. Really slowed me down and made me miserable. This last one was an ankle fusion (5 months off work) got back up to 333, down 45 lbs to 289 last 3.5 months. But dealing with a Sciatica, pulled hamstring, and tendon in my foot all on right side cause I haven't been walking properly :( so back for more PT. Just SUX! I work all night on my feet too.

Still have my restriction in place, staying focused on eating good (Not great) but enough to keep the weight coming off. Keto, Paleo or some version of it.

It's funny, that's what I've joked about with family and friends is crashing the wagon, cooking my food with the remains and then realizing I have to walk

Hang in there, you can lose it again.

on 5/15/18 11:34 am

For your sciatica problems, you may want to find a Bowen Therapist. Bowen Therapy works great on sciatica. Also, try not to wear flats, it will make it worse. You need 1" to 1-1/2" heels. I had to give up my birks, which I was in for over 15 yrs. Most of my clients don't leave my office until I've used my elbow in their butt, which knocks the sciatic nerve down. It goes from very painful at first, until it's tolerable, but they walk much better.

Bowen Therapy is a muscle manipulation modality that works on fixing the structural balance of the body.

HW/225 - 5'1" ~ SW/205/after surgery 215 ~ CW/145~ BMI-25.8~Normal BMI 132 ~DS Dr Rabkin 4/17/08
Plastics in Monterrey - See Group on OH Dr Sauceda Jan 13, 2011
LBL, BL, small thigh lift, arms & a full facelift on 1/17/11
UBL 1/21/13
Love my Body by Sauceda