scared of dying during surgery

Your fear is totally normal.  Yes, you could die on the table, but we all had that fear and we did it anyway.  Best of luck to you and may you have a LONG life with LOTS of grand children.

 

Honestly the last thing I feared was dying during surgery, I would be asleep forever that way, that wasn't my fear, my fear was not getting surgery or waking up and them not being able to do it.  Dying during surgery is only a tiny risk, staying MO is a death sentence, a long painful one.  Nearly 9 yrs of normal weight, no diabetes, being able to stand without pain and move freely, that's living. 

Fear is a normal part of human nature.



I had fear but my fear of dying because of my super morbid obesity was greater.



The way I looked at it was: I was dying if I stayed my size anyway. Having WLS I was at least doing something about it. I was also extremely big (467 at my heaviest). I don't know what your numbers are and your situation might be different. Good luck.

Like you, I also had an extreme fear of dying during surgery!  

So much so, that it kept me up many nights, and for many weeks (if not even for several months), pre-surgery.  

And so much so, that the day of surgery I had such anxiety that they had to knock me out early in the waiting/holding area .  

And so much so, that my sister said the first thing I asked waking up AFTER surgery was "Am I still alive?" LOL.

But despite having such an extreme fear of dying, I somehow pushed thru the fear, one day at a time.  Day after day after day, night after night.  Yep, I silently cried to myself as I fell asleep thinking about things.  I cried my fears to several friends.  And I cried with family.  I was SO scared of this surgery.  (And I've had my share of surgeries too).  I did NOT want to die.

Understand a little background history of mine.... about 2-3 years prior to WLS, I ended up in the hospital for almost a week due to a bad infection on my lower abdomen.  Somehow a pimple or ingrown hair blew up/got badly infected, and then the infection spread throughout the fatty tissue of my lower abdomen.  It was called "Necrotizing Cellulitis", one step below "Necrotizing Fasciitis" (which is that flesh-eating disease!).  I needed surgery immediately, and they cut my abdomen from left to right, under the "apron" of my hanging belly of all places, to clean out the infection (imagine the uncomfortable recovery after THAT surgery).  5 days after being in the hospital, labs came back, it was determined I had Staph, Strep, and C-Dif infections!  I was lucky this infection didnt get deeper into my system and attack my muscles or organs.  But I was rather ashamed at the same time that this had happened to me regardless, especially when my surgeon told me the infection attacked my "fatty tissue" and it was harder for me to heal because I was diabetic.  Basically it was a nice way of telling me I was obese or fat, yeah I got the hint.

So when WLS surgery was quickly approaching, and YEAH I was scared out of my mind of dying, I somehow dug deep and put things in perspective by repeating this famous line from the movie Shawshank Redemption (and if you haven't seen it, you have to!):

"Get busy living or get busy dying"

Here's a clip from the movie:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=46GwJbrMghQ

I could have stayed where I was at, struggling with weight loss and could have continued to encounter more unexpected, as well as expected, medical problems in my future.  

Or...  I could choose to do something about it.  It's all about having choices in life, isn't it?

Well, I chose to get busy living!   And if I was going to die in the process, well, it was because I was chasing that dream.  And my family and friends knew that too.  And suddenly, I was okay with that notion.  

Mind it, it didn't necessarily knock out the fear of dying completely, until it was all over.  But I was more at peace with my decision in my mind when I came to that realization.  

I think of it another way... if I had to pick the lesser of 2 evils, I sure didn't want to get busy dying by continuing to be complacent or ignorant about my health.  I knew I had to try something to get my health back in order, and I knew this was a tool that I had to try.

By the way, for whatever it's worth, I'm 87 lbs down my highest weight (from that day I was in the hospital 2-3 yrs ago).  I only had VSG surgery 6+ months ago.  I still have a looong ways to go though, and I'm currently struggling with a stall/plateau for about 1-2 months now (extremely frustrating! I won't lie.).  But I'll take this small (and temporary) problem than being where I was at several yrs ago!

Also, I just got my two(2) work ID's retaken a few weeks ago.  I haven't shared these pics yet on this board, but I'll post them here so you can compare the progress and perhaps get a little inspired too (first pic in each pair is from Dec 2010 - second pic in each pair is Sep 2013). 

 

Good luck to you!

 

 

Awesome post, awesome progress and awesome MOVIE too, btw!! :-)

I had my surgery Jan. 11 2007 at 367 lbs. Im now about 150-160. It fluctuates (ugh!) I, too, was terrified I would die duting surgery. I was a single Mom and my youngest was only 5 at the time. I had researched the surgery for years prior to having it and thought I knew everything I could know, but u find u still learn things throughout the whole journey. Long story short... I had severe sleep apnea,diabetes, and a long list of other medical problems and in my heart I knew if I didnt have surgery I was gonna die FOR SURE. No matter how scared I was I was even scarder that I would die in my sleep and my baby would wake up and find me that way. When I finally convinced myself to go through with WLS I was met with another problem. I was on medicaid and it didnt cover WLS at that time. SO I was screwed. I felt like Id been handed a death sentence. As luck, or God, would have it tho, I ran into a friend who had gone to Mexico and had surgery 5 years prior. She called her surgeon and found it would cost me $5,000.00 to have it done. I was broke! So still doomed. THEN...my brother (now deceased, god rest his soul) asked me if I knew what I was doing and if this wa what I really wanted. I said yes and he said he and his wife would give me the money. So...I took a plane ( for the first time) to a foreign country (for the first time) and had surgery in a tiny hospital by a doctor I had never seen before in my life and woke up tonurses who didnt speak english. That being said... they anticipated my every need, I had no complications, I lost over 250lbs and would do it again in a heartbeat if I had to. But thank God I dont have to! LOL  You WILL be fine. Its normal to be scared, but like I and many others have said..its a small risk compared to the certain death u are facing if u DONT have it done. ANd u will be so amazed at how differant your life will be and how u will feel. I had been obese my entire life so I could have never dreamed how awesome it is to be able to do the things I can do now but couldnt before. I only wish I could have done it sooner and when I was younger. I was 40 when I had it done. Quit worring and focus on how wonderful ur life will be afterward. I wish u the very best!!

First, I am almost 12 years post op - about 110 pounds gone from the surgery, another 20 over the last two years. 

I was terrified just like you. I was new to this site and posted a similar entry. Someone responded and said, the odds of you dying from obesity are greater than dying on the table. It was sobering words that helped me past my fear. WLS has changed so much since I had my gastric bypass RnY. What procedure are you considering?

I first started researching WLS when my youngest son was about 11 years old. He begged me not to do it. I waited until he was no longer afraid. I could no longer bend over to tie my sneakers without being winded. I knew it was time. My weight kept me from enjoying my boys' childhoods to their fullest. 

The fear is normal. Your chance at a normal life is attainable. Funny, it has been raining today and I am in Texas. If you need an angel, don't hesitate to let me know. I am happy to share my experiences, good and bad.