Please Help, need advice

 I was diagnosed back around 1999 with fibro. I am a nurse, my husband an occupational therapist. I have fought so hard for so long to not let this get me down or stop me. I am in so much pain now, stiff, tired, foggy and swelling all over. I have broken down and called my doctor for an appointment tomorrow. I am not taking any meds at this time although I should be. During a time when I was under the care of pain management and on 10mg Hydrocodone and antidepressants I felt much better, but didn't care for some side effects. Also my husband hated the idea of me being on "drugs" of ANY kind, pain killers, antidepressants etc. He started to call me an addict and so I started to refused medication and just suffer. I think the suffering has mad it worse. I am so tired and in so much pain I finally want to cry. I don't work anymore and havent since 2008, I can't. I am appying for social sec disability at this time. My attorney says I am insane to not be on medication and allowing myself to suffer. I am afraid of asking for pain medication anymore cause I am affraid of being judged by doctors etc. I have, in the past, tried pretty much ALL the alternate medications for fibro by the way. I also have: spinal stenosis, sciatica, oesteo arthritis, herniated discs, anular tears to discs and scar tissue from spinal injections. 
I am having surgery next week to have VSG done and am so thrilled about this. It is the one thing I have to give me hope right now. 
Any one out gone through this?? Please help me find some answers.

When I read this I was so angry for you! I cant believe that somebosy who loves you, and shouldnt want to see you in pain, would call you a junky. I, at 32, have severe dibilitating spinal osteoarthritis, and will be going to my PCP this Friday to discuss Fibro with him. My P.A. did alot of lbs and everything was normal, yet I am in pain all over, from the neck down. Every muscle, joint, and OMG my feet, hips, and elbows are the worst. People that are not in this amount of pain, just do not understand, and never will. There is such a terrible stigma in the medical field and in society of people that HAVE to take narcotics to function each day. I know from experience too. I havent worked since 2009, myself. Gosh, I can so relate to what you're going through. My family tries to be supportive, but there are "issues" about drugs too. I thought RNY would be my answer to start getting a life back, but now I think the surgery triggered this because it became full blown about 2 weeks after my surgery. Now I feel so disheartened. I am only 32 and have all these problems that somebody much older should be having. I am just not sure how I am going to live my life in even more pain than I was in before. I dont have any answers for you, but know that there is at least one person out here that feels you're pain. Thank you for posting this, because I feel better too. Good Luck with your VSG, losing weight does give me something to look forward to, as I'm sure it does with you too. 

Hon please don't suffer because others don't understand! Myself I take morphine and oxycodone every day but I use it as prescribed and I do not consider myself an addict. I may be physically addicted in the sense that I would have withdrawls if I quit cold turkey but I don't doctor shop, pharmacy shop or steal to get my drugs. There is a whole different mind set in someone who uses drugs to get high and someone who needs them to function on a daily basis because of pain. Please get back with the pain clinic so they can get you on medication to help you, not all of the meds for fibro are narcotics. However if you need them to have a better quality life don't turn them down for fear of being labeled a junkie. Shame on your hubby for treating you this way, does he enjoy watching you be in pain? I can't imagine my husband saying anything unless he truely felt I needed intervention and he hasn't so I feel confident that I'm not out of line with my med use. Actually studies have shown people who use narcotics for pain control are far LESS likely to show addictive behavior and are more compliant with their docs instructions. Most of us on narcotics are very thankful for the pain relief and wouldn't dream of doing anything to jeopardize that. Good luck and feel free to come here to vent anytime!

Thank you both so very much for your support. I have been through so much in  the last 3-4yrs. My back injury at work, taking in my father and caring for him until he died in 8/09, injury my back again in 6/09 after being thrown from a horse (spent almost 2 weeks in hospital), my house burnt to the ground the day after I got out of the hospital from horse accident (insurance had lapsed 2 days before fire since I was in the hospital and couldn't pay it), I had to close the horse rescue I had been running (I was the brains, not the braun) and in 5/10 I had emergency surgery to remove my lap band due to major port infection and slippage. We moved in 6/10 right after my surgery only to have the rental house have plumbing problems and flood. All my weight has come back plus even more co-morbidities. I am so tired from all of lifes crap. 
I went to the doctor this morning. I cried so much. My doctor seemed to kinda understand but I dont know. She prescribed me diuretics for two reasons, 1) swelling in my hands, feet, ankles etc, 2) my BP is a little high ( which could be from the amount of pain Im in). She also prescribed me Vicodin, just enough to help til surgery next week. She had blood drawn for a ton of lab tests also. 
I told my husband about my visit and what she prescribed. All he said is, "you don't have to take the vicodin if you don't really need it." Like he completely does not get it!!!! He has NO CLUE the amount of pain, stiffness and misery I am in. If I try to explain it he just cuts me off, or gets angry (I think cause he can't help me) o r "advises" me on what to do!!!! He got his first tattoo last weekend and almost died from the pain. I had my makeup tattooed yrs ago so I am not a wimp. I told him if you think that was suffering live a couple days in my shoes. If one more person tells me to "walk more, exercise more, eat this, dont eat that, etc etc etc" I am going to f---ing loose it!!!!!! 
I am sorry but I have NO ONE to talk to about this or vent to, anyone. Let alone someone that would even understand a little. 
Thank you for just listening. I have no friends here so I have no support for this. My husband supports my surgery but doesn't understand my illness. I am sooooo f---ing alone.

God, I so know how you feel. It seems that my whole life has been a series of crap after crap happening. I think to myself, what have I done to the universe that would make me be **** on so much. I just dont understand it. I'm not usually one to whine and ***** about my problems, but like you I dont have anybody else to talk to that remotely understands all the physical, let alone the mental problems that life has forced upon me. Except for old people in their 70-80's! Men are completely worthless when it comes to pain or sickness. A tattoo, are you serious? It is a scientific fact that women handle pain etc better then men. If he were in your shoes or mine for that matter, he's be singing a different tune. I've already been through the morphine, fentenyl patches, oxy, methadone etc. I think my pain management docs almost gave up. I started about 6 mo ago on a very contraversial synthetic opiate, that the FDA approved for using to get junkies off their drug of choice. It has been used in Europe for over 30 years as a majorly strong pain med, but since our FDA says that it is for junkies, you cant imagine how I get looked at when at any kind of medical establishment. Then I have to explain why I am on it, and they can call my pain management doc if they want to. It also blocks the receptor in your brain to not let any other opiates in, so if you are on opiates and take it, you go into withdrawals. Scary. It was a big problem when I had surgery, to try to explain to my Spanish surgeon how it worked and hoow to give pain meds after surgery. People just do not understand what we go through, just trying to be a "normal" person. I too, get so friggin' tired of people tellingme if I exercise more it wont hurt as bad. Bull**** I used to try and walk the dirt path beside my house and be crying and afraid I wouldnt be able to make it back. That's just not how peole are supposed to live at 32. I know what you mean about being so alone too. If it wasnt for my 2 dogs, I dont know how I would keep going. I'm worried that if anything happened to me no one would take care of them properly. I noticed for the first time this morning that my left hand and foot were swollen. They went down somewhat as the day progressed but...anyway enough for my pity party today!!
P.S. I know how you feel, asking somebody to be "your friend". It's like the little notes in school where the other person has to check the box!!!

 I mistyped. My father passed away in 8/08, not 09. Sorry. :) 

You ladies go right ahead and vent. I'm very thankful I have support and most folks understand my being unable to do alot of things. I hope things get better for both of you!!! Life is hard enough without all the garbage you've been thru. Bless you both!

Hi You all,

I've never been here, and don't know much about fibro...I saw a comercial for some medicine and they described in general terms what it feels like (it is).

I am scared to even consider the possibility but, what is it?  How does it feel?

I feel tired all the time, like the nerves in my back, shoulders, legs, feet, etc are...burning? little needles.

There are times when the pain on the back of my left shoulder blade, all the way up the neck to the base of the scull is so tight that I just have to lie down and like do nothing for hours.

3 months ago or so, I was diagnosed with ADD and Anxiety and began to take alprazolam 0.25mg (up to 3 times a day if needed - and this seems to help with the physical burning feelings...which triggers, mental anxiety).   I was also given a prescription for something very similar to Adderall (its called Dextrostat ) and that seem to help initially with the ADD and Depression, but now, these Physical sensation of my nerves being on fire...like there is too much electricity running through the nerves, makes me question just what the hell is wrong with me.

Please don't scare me anymore by telling me what you have "heard" about this medicines that I'm taking with A LOT of care because...anyway.  If you've taken them and noticed a cause-effect relationship to Fibro, please tell me...other than that I really don't need anything else to feel bad about (like the original poster, I too have been shamed for similar reasons by a lot of people).

I just want to feel normal (not depressed, anxious, tired, confused, and especially NOT in physical pain)  because this is all becoming like a nervous vicious circle that I dont' know, if one thing is related to another (directly) or if this is the typical crap that happens to us long-term post ops...forgive me if I sound frustrated.

I am scared, sad and feeling lonely and confused.  btw, prior to WLS back in 2002, I did NOT have any addictions, anxiety or painful/burning feelings of any kind.

help!

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