I grew up without Fast Food.  Soda & "junk food" was not allowed in our home.  Guess what?  I was still the fat kid.  I have three older brothers - none of whom grew up fat - same diet, even less exercise than this fat kid.

Some of the weight is medical - you spoke of diabetes.  Much of the weight is bad eating habits.  After "growing up," at age 19, I discovered McDonalds would make a Big Mac just lettuce & cheese (I hate all the other stuff).  Ugh!  In the age of Fast Food, Dashboard Dining, I saw my already fat body turn super morbidly obese.  I don't have diabetes, but I am also ridiculously obese.

I do NOT drink sodas - diet or otherwise.  I allow myself once in a while a Fast Food meal - it is usually Taco Bell Fresco Meal.  I cook from scratch - staying away from "prepared" foods.  It is a tough row to hoe, but if you keep positive, you will become a healthy version of you - without surgery.

Exercise! Exercise! Exercise!  Even if it is just parking your car further from wherever you are going.  Doing my trips up & down stairs in your home (or wherever).  Taking an evening walk to clear your head.  Movement is the key to getting your body working with you - not against you.

I weigh over 400 pounds, but I still swim laps at a local pool three times a week.  I walk at a local park - laps, even when people look at me for being huge.  It is difficult to face the World, but I think hiding out from it would be worse.  I used to play sports, go dancing all the time, I was learning how to waterski (I weighed high 200's) when I destroyed my leg.  The only thing that will keep me in bed is a coma - or death.  I hope I can get my weight into a healthy range, that is why I get out of bed every morning.

Take those children of yours to the park - and PLAY with them.  I did.  I was in the low 300 range when I had a wagon hooked to my bicycle to take them to & from school.  Played soccer with my girls and participated as a volunteer in their classroom.  You may not see a size 2, but you can be healthy at a size 22.

Stop looking at the scale & look at your overall health.  If you decide WLS is for you, that's fine.  If you decide you aren't ready for it (I did, a few years ago), then work on being the healthiest you, possible.

Good luck!  For me, I am finally decided I am going forward with surgery.  Surgery is NOT a cure, just a tool.  If you've never heard of TOPS, it is a non-profit club for supportive weight loss.

Brenda  : )~

Hello :) I am new to this site and only half way considering surgery. I am 21 years old,  5 foot 2 and 307 pounds. Obesity runs in my family, but no one in my family has had surgery. My mother dieted and exercised for 2 years and lost of her weight and went from 280 lbs to 160 lbs. I was hoping that some of you could give me advice on diet and exercise. Really, in all honesty, I am looking for support without surgery. Im looking for people I can turn to when I feel like giving up that will encourage me to keep going. I have been trying to lose weight for a year and everytime I try, I give up becuase I have no one to push me to keep going. No one to give me strength to continue. I am tired of being obese. I just want help.

Where does anyone find the stregth to keep going?

-Skittles

 Good job on the 1.5 lb loss! hope your kiddo's are feeling better soon! 

Hello There and Welcome,
I can relate to a lot of what you posted. It breaks my heart because I know how much it hurts and how much you want things to be different. I had tried every diet known to man and had lost and gained hundreds of pounds in my lifetime. I even became a vegan and exercise freak and lost 100lbs in 8months when I was in my 20's. I of course gained it all back because I couldn't live that lifestyle, it was killing me. I eventually became anorexic and was ordered by my dr to put on weight or she would hospitalize me. I put on weight alright, at my known heaviest ( I stopped weighing myself eventually) I was 273. I was in bad shape. Two days after Christmas 2007, my morbidly obese father suddenly died. At the end of his life, he was so heavy he couldn't do anything for himself. I could see myself heading in the same direction and it scared me. I didn't want my sons to have to be doing everything for me the way we had to for my dad. I wanted a different life. After gaining 20 more pounds. I decided to change. Diets had never worked. I prayed and asked God to help me be different. I made a commitment to myself to make better food choices, watch portion control and move more. I took it at first hour by hour then day by day. Each decision at a time. If I screwed up, I wouldn't beat myself up about it. I would just make a better decision next time. The big difference this time was just that. I decided not to pressure myself, not to beat myself up and to take it slow. It is not a race. I had bought a Wii for my sons for Christmas and also the Wii Fit. I decided to play on that for 15 mins a day for exercise. It was fun. When 15 mins became too easy, I upped my time to 20 and so on. Eventually I was doing 1 hour of cardio 5 days a week. I lost over 124lbs in a little over a year. I have struggled with self-hatred and lack of self-worth most of my life. Losing the weight didn't make that go away, in fact, it brought it all to the surface. When I had lost around 90lbs, I had a nervous breakdown of sorts. I no longer had the fat or the overeating to hide behind. I always knew I was obese because of emotional pain, not because I loved food. I just didn't know how to stop the pain.  I am a woman of faith, I don't know if you are. I'm not trying to preach to you or convert you to anything, I am just telling you my story. I wanted a different life. I knew somewhere inside I wasn't this sad, defeated person who hated herself. I knew this wasn't who God had made me to be. I asked for God to reveal who I really was. I needed to really see myself through His eyes not my own, not through the way this world views me. Over a few really tough months He did just that. He showed me TRUTH. I am not what people have told me I am. I am not a body image or a label. I am who God says I am. That is the truth. It has set me free. I am a different person inside and out. I no longer have a screwed up relationship with food. I used to hate it. Now it is a blessing that is used to fuel my body. It is possible to live a different life. If it is possible for me and others, it is possible for you. I want to encourage you to want more for yourself. You are worth it. This is not who God made you to be. He wants a different life for you too. My biggest advice to you is to take it slow. Little steps, little changes, without putting too much pressure on yourself. If you mess up, no big deal, move on. This is NOT a race. You are changing your life.You have to find a lifestyle you can live with for the rest of your life. It takes time. I believe that most people, if not all, are not obese just becasue they love food. Pain is the real culprit. If we can find the source of that pain and deal with and heal from i,t we can change our bodies for good. PM me if you need to talk or need anything at all. I will be praying for you. God bless you.

Hi Michelle. Thank you so much for your reply. I agree about the CBT. My oldest daughter has OCD and this type of therapy has worked wonders for her!

It's so cool to talk to someone my age with three kids too! I would absoulutely love to talk and get any information you would be willing to share. As you can see I need help!!! Do you have a way for me to PM you? Let me know and I really look forward to talking to you more!