Dear Peachpie,
 I totally understand. I am strong willed and a loner by nature as well and I also do not, and never have cared for "the buddy system".  I too struggled with this, including with my sister.I felt guilty for feeling this way because I was so grateful to God for pulling me out of myself and showing me who He truely made me to be. What God showed me is that I am not responsible for other people's journey only my own. I pass on the knowledge and experience that has been given to me but I do not connect myself to it. I will be supportive, but I also will draw lines that I do not cross. Weight issues are usually more about inner hurts than about food. So even the most perfect weight plan in the world won't stick if you yourself don't realize why you are overweight. I am resolved that I cannot fix anybody but me, and I can't even do that (Lord knows I've tried) without God's help. I will answer whatever questions people have, I will be supportive but I will not let it affect what I know about myself or what works for me. I just tell people that each journey is individual and what worked for me may not work for them. They have to heal their hurts and find a healthy, liveable lifestyle that will afford them personal sucess. A lifestyle that they can stick to and live with forever. I don't know what your situation is with your sister, but for me, I have always been "the fat sister" and she has always been "the skinny sister". She has recently gained about 30lbs and is for the first time in her life really struggling with her weight. I am much thinner and in much better shape than she is and I know this hurts her and makes her feel like less. I felt really bad about this at first, but then I realized that by feeling bad and poisoning myself, I'm not helping her and I'm definitely not helping myself. So I don't allow myself to do that anymore. I am straight forward with her. I help as much as I am able but do not sabotage myself to do it. I have learned that if you don't take care of yourself,  you will not be well to ever help anyone else. For this reason, it is not selfishness. I don't know what your faith is, but I give glory to God for my sucesses and because of that feel it is an honor to pass on what I've learned but not to the point that it makes me sick again. God does want me to use what He showed me, but not to the point that end up back where I was. Hope this encourages you. Take care and God bless you and your journey.

Congrats Ruth! You must be so proud! I'm so glad you had a nice time. Welcome back.

Interesting topic Skylar. I don't think I have fat thinking at all. Despite my weight I have no anxieties about the typical thing overweight/obese people have. I don't fear walking or activities, I don't fear wearing short sleeves or sleeveless tops- I wear any color w/o regard to how it'll make me look, I don't dread swimsuits- I can even can find a feature or two I like of myself in one. Don't get me wrong- 'fat thoughts' venture into my mind- but not enough for me to alter how I live my life...its usually a passing thought for me. 

So I think I'm the polar opposite...I guess I have "skinny thinking". Problem with that is it kept me from realizing just how out of hand my weight was. (denial is a son of a b....). But at least I don't have to reverse my fat thinking...I just have to get my body to catch up with my mind ;-)

Wow, Skylar...how neat to have those records and even more so the feelings of that 100lb weight loss recorded!  I think it's very important to have some kind of accountability.  I have kept a diary of my weight (loss and gains) on a sporadic basis over the years and it's always interesting to me to look back and see "how much did I weigh last year when I went on this vacation" and similar instances.

I weigh daily....actually twice daily (right before bed and first thing in the morning) and have for the past couple of months been recording it on the daily weigh in thread on Low Carb Friends.  It has really helped me stay accountable to myself and has stopped me several times when I would normally snack at nigh****ching TV, knowing that weight had to be recorded the next morning and not just once/week at my WW weigh-in.  It also has helped me realize how my body reacts to the unhealthy carbs and salt....I'm wickedly fluid retentive and have had a couple of episodes of A-fib recently when losing large amounts of fluid all at once (whoosh).  I am learning amazing things about my body and feel that I'm really taking baby steps all in the right direction toward accomplishing my goals.

Next goal....getting into some kind of exercise routine. 

In addition to my weight loss, my diet has eliminated several co-morbidities that interfered with my ability to move and do regular activities - and I've been feeling normal for many months now.

You would think that along with the physical changes, that there would be mental changes too - and there have been. But every once and a while I realize that something I was thinking was "fat  thinking" left over from when I was super morbidly obese and it shocks me when it happens.

For example, when we went to the Arts festival we had to drive around to find parking. There wasn't much available on the streets and we ended up parking in a $10. DH is superb at finding fabulous parking spots but it just wasn't his day - the whole time I was thinking how I wanted to park close to the entrance and it didn't matter what it costs because I  didn't want to wear myself out just walking to the festival. What I forgot is that it doesn't matter anymore where we park, I can walk for miles and miles without getting tired and in fact extra walking is good exercise. I wonder when my brain will catch up with the new reality of me.

The trouble with "fat  thinking" is that it acts to help keep you fat - things like trying to limit how much you have to move or walk while doing simple every day stuff like walking into work, shopping for groceries etc. all add up to less calories burned, less muscle and bone being built etc. It's defeating us before we even start.

Do you have "fat  thinking" - how can we change to "healthy thinking".