X Post: Are "vets" condescending?
Thanks folks for such thoughtful comments. The thread just struck a chord with me as I've been here a long time and have been called every name in the freakin' book for offering common sense, been there done that, advice. I guess I just want you all to know that EVERYONE on this forum is valued, newbie, oldie, or 'tween. In my (not at all humble opinion lol) I really, truly believe that this Ontario forum is the best one going.
Love you guys. :)
Love you guys. :)
Karen
Ontario Recipes Forum - http://www.obesityhelp.com/group/ontario_recipes/
I thinK those that stick around are saints. Their patience is commendable and their insight invaluable. I also know that I will need to be here as time passes because I need the support too and will for a long time to come.
Many long timers say they don't post anymore because they are busy with life - ok - but what about once a month ? Do you really not have 1/2 hour to help some others out? If you don't want to help newbies because of the repetitive questions than what about the maintenance boards or just an update to tell us how you are doing and whether we can PM you if we are struggling and you continue to be successful.
I suspect many are struggling and don't want to admit it. How are we going to continue to be successful without some accountability and sharing.
I have lost my patience responding to some of the "I haven't lost any weight and don't follow my doctor's plan, just eat less of everything - why aren't I losing whines on the VSG board. I can be very supportive the first time they ask for help but weeks later when nothing has changed and they are back saying the same thing, I'm sorry, if you didn't make changes or at least tryafter the first time round of support and suggestions, why would I try and help you again. You have to make the changes and not expect and miracle and I can't believe how many expect a miracle on the other boards. There are so many new people on the VSG boards that want and need the help. It is an extremely fast moving board and those struggling can be past over and I worry about that. I would rather spend my time helping those that want to help themselves but need some support and direction.
I am no vet and yet I understand the need to respond to a newbie when all their other responses come from newbies or those waiting for surgery who are all rainbows and butterflies . I have been told on occasion that I am not supportive and not helpful. Telling someone to follow their plan and to quit drinking and eating chips, etc. at 4 months out IS being supportive but responders don't know what they don't know. Those that come in prepared - ie join OH before surgery and learn about their surgeries and challenges, those that ask for and listen to suggestions and report back to their doctor if they have follow up and report back to the boards, those that stay around after the first 6 month honeymoon phase are the heroes on these boards.
When I find I cannot say something constructive and/or a poster has ticked me off then I don't respond and will wait till next time. We all have bad days and often postings don't really give a true account of what the poster/responder is feeling and trying to say. Just as we as responders should give PIA posters a second try so should posters give vets a second try and or find ones you respect to follow.
Boy, I am in a very chatty mood today and it is procratination from doing what it is I need to to do. I will stop now and get to tasks that take care of me.
Many long timers say they don't post anymore because they are busy with life - ok - but what about once a month ? Do you really not have 1/2 hour to help some others out? If you don't want to help newbies because of the repetitive questions than what about the maintenance boards or just an update to tell us how you are doing and whether we can PM you if we are struggling and you continue to be successful.
I suspect many are struggling and don't want to admit it. How are we going to continue to be successful without some accountability and sharing.
I have lost my patience responding to some of the "I haven't lost any weight and don't follow my doctor's plan, just eat less of everything - why aren't I losing whines on the VSG board. I can be very supportive the first time they ask for help but weeks later when nothing has changed and they are back saying the same thing, I'm sorry, if you didn't make changes or at least tryafter the first time round of support and suggestions, why would I try and help you again. You have to make the changes and not expect and miracle and I can't believe how many expect a miracle on the other boards. There are so many new people on the VSG boards that want and need the help. It is an extremely fast moving board and those struggling can be past over and I worry about that. I would rather spend my time helping those that want to help themselves but need some support and direction.
I am no vet and yet I understand the need to respond to a newbie when all their other responses come from newbies or those waiting for surgery who are all rainbows and butterflies . I have been told on occasion that I am not supportive and not helpful. Telling someone to follow their plan and to quit drinking and eating chips, etc. at 4 months out IS being supportive but responders don't know what they don't know. Those that come in prepared - ie join OH before surgery and learn about their surgeries and challenges, those that ask for and listen to suggestions and report back to their doctor if they have follow up and report back to the boards, those that stay around after the first 6 month honeymoon phase are the heroes on these boards.
When I find I cannot say something constructive and/or a poster has ticked me off then I don't respond and will wait till next time. We all have bad days and often postings don't really give a true account of what the poster/responder is feeling and trying to say. Just as we as responders should give PIA posters a second try so should posters give vets a second try and or find ones you respect to follow.
Boy, I am in a very chatty mood today and it is procratination from doing what it is I need to to do. I will stop now and get to tasks that take care of me.