OT - my son got into hockey!

I was so worried that he wouldn't get in...signed him and his younger brother in April up for Stanley Stick, was at the time, pretty hopeful he'd get in, but as time passed and no cheques were cashed...September came and went and still nothing...started sending emails, leaving messages, just to get an answer to see if he was in or not.  Last week I got a reply back that he was #1 on the wait list, then a couple days later was told there was a cancellation and I should expect a call soon!  Well, this morning, I got the email from his coach!! he starts Sunday at 8am! woohoo!!  I am so excited but at the same time wondering what am I doing!  I have three kids, my schedule is pretty much booked with all their activities: Monday - hip hop for my oldest, Tuesday - hip hop for my youngest, Wednesday - jazz for my daughter, Thursday - tap for my daughter and cubs for my oldest, Saturday - indoor soccer for my daughter, which I coach and now Sunday - hockey for the oldest....since their dad isn't involved in their lives, I feel keeping them busy is the best thing, and having financial assistance towards these activities makes it affordable (HE, my ex, does NOT contribute towards any of it)  I think that's what is making it somewhat easier for my "diet" but am afraid I am wearing myself too thin...

good for you, just be careful not to overbook them, or you. THey need some downtime too. (and so do you)

Very exciting! and very busy! Maybe there'll be another child in hockey that lives close to you and you can arrange with the parent to take turns bringing the kids.... but then you wouldn't get to watch which would probably be tough!! Enjoy. I hope it all goes well and you find some great downtime too

 Too bad for the Dad he isn't involved!  I read a startling stat the other day, over one half of black fathers under the age of 30 have nothing to do with their child's life, no support, either moral nor financial...  As my child's life has defined me for the past 18 years I can not fanthom that type of person.  

I wish I had an easy answer for you, or even a hard one.  You must make time to care for yourself, your health fails and your care of the kids is endangered.  Not being judgemental, just sayin.  

The second I found out I was going to be a mom the first time, I knew my life was going to change in the best way possible...I have always put the well being of my children first, they are my whole life.  It does baffle me that not everyone feels that way when they become a parent.

I do try, have great friends, just a tight budget so getting a sitter isn't always so easy (grandma seems to have a busy social life! she's my freebie)  I am a worry-wart about that too...it scares me to know that if anything does happen to me, my kids will be lost, I hope/believe my mom would step in and possibly my brother (he has two kids only 1/2 the time)  We have a laugh now and then that the three of us are all single at the same time, we lost my dad almost 6 years ago to cancer, while he was battling, my brother and his ex went through a rough patch, tried to reconcile after the loss but didn't work out, and last year I finally put my kids and my happiness first.

 I trained in the financial planning area and was pretty good at it when I got sick about ten years ago.  One thing I always did was have frank discussions about estate planning and wills.  I am not a lawyer but know a bit about what people should think about and discuss, esp when kids are involved. Please forgive me for using your thread about your son getting into hockey to broach this but I can't help myself.  Congrats to your son, please!  

You should get over whatever barriers your family has regarding guadianship of your kids.  You should know they will step up, or won't, and if not you need to make other plans, if possible.  I have had clients buy small insurance policies to help ease the financial burden of guardianships, and in some cases have had their brothers/sisters figure out a way to pay insurance premiums as a pooled responsibility because some were more able than others but the concept of leaving money for kid's care was desirable.  

In any case, a will (if you can't afford a lawyer get a will kit from a bookstore or internet, just make sure its Ontario based) is a neccesity and it describes the guardianship arrangements made for your kids.  

The anxiety folks place on this tres important planning is not OK.  The anxiety should be when there are no formal plans.  When it comes to guardianship of kids do the planning and formailize it so the courts (read Province of Ontario) recognize what you have done. Do you buy helmets and mothguards for your kids who play sports?  Of course you do.  This is the same type of thing, just in case of your unexpected death.  Sorry again.

Well.  I have to say that I completely agree and had a chat with a financial planner friend about exactly this, this very afternoon.  Mine needs to be updated and I've avoided it.  No time like the present.

FYI, it's not just black men.  I've been on my own with Jesse since he was 5. And have tried my f'ing hardest to provide for him.  So I know where you're coming from.  My boyfriend raised his two daughters all on his own as well. Another friend of mine has raised his two children on his own, and his son is suffering from cancer, no involement or contact from mom.  Yet ANOTHER wonderful male friend has also raised his two children on his own.

Dads are AWESOME.  Sounds like you did a wonderful job.

 I know its not just black men, that's just the stat I read the other day, such a huge percentage of Dads that have nothing to do with their kids!  The stat for caucasian was a lot lower but there were still lots of deadbeat Dads too.  

Sorry, really just meant to say "men" in general.  Despite my grrrr... trying to be kind here... "bad" experience, I really wanted to share the most fabulous 3 men I know in my life.

Well, besides my Dad.  No one trumps him.